SLEEPING AT UNHOLY HOURS N HALF THE DAY GONE

Nowadays just kinda of feeling bored. Bored cos I know that work will start in mid-Sept so I still have some time to do some stuff but I dun know what to do with this time or myself. I just cant decide what to do. Everything seems so Xian.

I want to spend time with family. But no one is around at home during weekdays or that during weekends, I am out for the whole day. Not much interaction. Also I am doing some of the cooking and cleaning when I am home cos my mom's back in Msia. Hence I also not motivated to stay at home. Sign.

Bored cos there is nothing interesting on T.V so I just dun know what to do to kill time. When my sisters come home, they start watching all those serials that are noisy and loud. Then I retreat to another area. I thought of watching animes, serials and Vcds. But just dun have the mood to sit around and watch. Just cant sit still while time just pass by. Yesterday was just like that.

Bored cos by the time I wake up, half the day is gone. Cos nowadays, I started reading my comics at night around 10pm and read until the wee hours of the morning ie 5am. Then go to sleep and wake up around 12pm. Half the day is really gone. Then until night time then I finally decide on what I want to do. Again the routine repeats itself.

Bored cos even gaming seems so xian after a while. There are still many games not completed but somehow I am 'stuck' in the games, my strategies not working. It seems every game has reached a stand-still. Just like my life at this point is at a stand-still. Dun know how the future will be like. Dun want to guess or pass judgement. Just waiting and thinking at this point. Am I getting impatient?

Man I often wonder how do housewives bear with this kind of monotony.

SHOPPING

Went shopping with Candle and Kheldar on Sunday. Well I was looking for plain clothes, not office wear. Still Me and Kheldar had lots of fun trying on the trenchcoats in Zara. In the end, the purchases ranking stood at Candle: 2 bags, 2 tops, 1 nose mask, followed by Me: 1 sweater and 1 nose mask. Kheldar demonstrated extreme financial discipline, though she was sorely tempted by a few pieces but prevailed and only spent on food and drinks. Bravo!

WEIQI

I had always wanted to learn weiqi since secondary but didnt have friends who knew how. I learnt a bit of basics from a cousin and books. But didnt proceed further. Many thanks to Candle who asked her friend to teach Me and Kheldar. Though the session was short, I did learn a bit more about weiqi especially about the 'bu ju' and attacking and retaliatory moves. A bit about 'zheng di' also. Will try to move on with this interest.

BAZAAR

Arrived at Tab's place early and fixed up a meal of spaghetti with the ingredients Kheldar bought earlier. Then lazed around and did tarot reading. Tab's deck is the Sun Deck. It is a deck good for work and health issues and gives accurate readings during the day. Mine is the Lover's Deck, loyal deck for interpersonal issues. It will give accurate readings for others except its owner...

So both of us did readings for work and for Tab, a certain 'fly' and 'meat' issues. Pretty postive for the 'Meat' if I remembered the readings. Cos my book is in mandarin and the explainations quite profound, I was very tired after a few readings.

Later when Candle came, we went down to Braddell to set up the stall. It rained pretty suddenly and I ended up doing reading for Candle too. Hers is pretty positive. Oh well I wonder if my tarot tell lies? When the rain stopped, and the crowds started appearing. Went and helped out a bit with selling and bought dinner. Quetzal came to help out too. Sales was brisk after our prices were slashed. Hmm really have to consider the target crowd next time. In all its a better experience compared to our first bazaar.

You have wings of STEEL. No one's really
sure why, but at this point in your life you've
shut off emotion to the point of extreme
apathy. You are cold and indifferent much of
the time...or perhaps you're just a good
pretender. Next to impossible to get close to,
even those who do never see the real you. It's
entirely possible that YOU don't even know the
real you. You have a certain fascination or
attraction to destruction on a massive scale -
disasters, perhaps even death or the concept of
the Apocalypse. Because you hold so much
inside, one day you're simply going to snap.
Then the mask will fall away, and your true
wings will be revealed. Until then you will
deal with whatever comes your way in icy bitter
silence and acceptance. On the positive side,
you are fearless and immeasurably strong - not
much can crack through your defenses. You
intrigue people, who can't help but wonder why
you're the way you are. A loner and one who
spends much of their time brooding and
contemplating life and death - you are a time
bomb waiting to explode and create some
destruction of your own.

Image Source:
elfwood.lysator.liu.se/.../nmetalwings.jpg.html
Words added by myself


*~*~*Claim Your Wings - Pics and Long Answers*~*~*
brought to you by Quizilla

Re-tried an interesting quiz. Last time was the Wings of Phoenix. The sign of Death and Rebirth. Blog entry in Feb 03. Now are Wings of Steel. Cold and ampathical. I feel both are correct snippets into the REAL me. What's your wings?

MONKEY NO MORE? PATH TO SALVATION OR DESTRUCTION?

Well the last few weeks has been pretty hectic. Interviews and Job opportunities came and went... I didnt count how many.

(1) During the week I stayed back in M'sia, my previous temp assignment called up to continue.
Since I was not contactable (Bloody joke of a roaming feature I have in my phone. Whats the use if cannot be contacted?) But losing it is not a pity, though previously I wanted to earn as much as I could.

(2) Bank Contract job came along in that same week. Was just abruptly called on Friday and told to start work on following monday. Incidentally I got a call on Thurs from the same bank that I was to go down for a Test. Oh well, I had thot that both calls were related to the same position. Later on, then found out that one was for the contract job and the other is actually perm. So never heard from the agency. Another job went flying.

(3) The following week, went for the bank test. It was actually quite fun and pretty simple, not easy. Quite enjoyed doing the test. Pending the outcome of the test, there would be interviews offered. That week, there would be an interview for a audit perm position. I did my homework and wanted to do well. But on Thurs, received an offer letter with regards to being an Educator. I had gone for the interview earlier. Well the pay was HIGH! I had never seen such an amount. That aside, I had given the matter serious thoughts. Why I chose this area and the concerns. I tried to address my own concerns and am okay with my answers. So with the security of one job in hand, I went for the Audit interview. It was a difficult interview indeed but I wasnt as desperate. Hence I could answer better with more confidence about my self worth.

(4) Today, is the day to go down and commit to be an Educator. Just after I finished signing and everything, missed the call from the Audit firm. Later on I called back to find that they are offering me the job. I politely thanked them and declined. Cos I had about prepared myelf to be an Educator. What would I be missing?

The chance of a lifetime to switch paths from banks to accountancy. The perks of working in a prestigious firm. Dun believe, just observe pple's reaction when u tell them u work in this firm vs being an Educator... The prestige, the big annual increments, the challenges, opportunities and basically everything in the whole wide world. Right? That's what we have been taught to think of ourselves. As the greatest gift to mankind. I will change the world and be insanely successful. Well u are not wrong to think so. Go on ahead.

I feel that is not what I want. True my dream is to own the world also, but I notice that I dun fit in, in such tense and one-man uppership world. If its REAL work, I have the confidence to beat you. But if there are elements of favouritism, flattering involved. I guess I might lose. My personality is not suited to Private world. Its not that I cant change, in fact I have gotten smarter after some work experience. But this is not what I seek. Not that these elements are missing in an Educator world. I can live with it, cos my main responsibility is to impart my knowlegde, inspire dreams and pass on what I have learnt. Its to be a supportive role. I guess though I dun look it, I am okay in this aspect.

My REAL LONG TERM GOAL is to be FINANCIALLY INDEPENDENT! That will not change whether I am in Private or not. That is the real goal. The rest are means to achieve it. There is definitely more than one path. Some friends feel that my choice is dictated by circumstances and pay. Partly true. Cos if I REALLY had a choice, I wont work at all. I dun know if I made my BEST choice but at least for now, it seems true. Well no turning back, onwards to the future. I want to be committed this time around. I want to enjoy and experience the full deal before I make any judgments whether I should have chosen the latter.

A perk is more time with family and self. Oh well... we shall see after I survive my first month.

Mystery of Driving License Solved!

Finally after putting it off for so long, being told endlessly by my Dad that I wont need it, and being immensely pissed off by my lack of mobility (M'sia IC Episode), I decided once and for all... that I will go down to the driving centre personally. So off I went to the Bukit Batok Driving Ctr. I didnt bother to consult any Spore maps or directory, just conveniently assuming that since its Bukit Batok Dr Ctr, it should be near to the Bukit Batok MRT. Right? Wrong guess smartypants! After calling up to clarify, it is at Bukit Gombak... Great work Sherlock Holmes.

When I arrived, I followed my friend's advice, got onto the shuttle bus and reached there safely. Well definitely knew I was at the right place, cos everywhere around me are pple and cars or bikes with a Capital L stuck behind. :) Great! I made it safely. Only this time, I didnt know where to begin. So I looked blur and walked around the reception area. A friendly customer service lady came and asked me. I just blurredly say signing up for driving course. She gave me a form, brochure and directed me to the instant photo machine for photographs. Okay, then I took a seat and browsed thru the form. Err I had forgotten my passport and entry permit since I'm PR. Okay then next trip. I approached her again to clarify the structure and costs of the driving course which she skilfully diverted with this reply "Oh, if u sign up for the course package, u can go into the briefing room where they will explain in detail." Much as I appreciate her help, this was not useful. Then I asked her if she knew whether PR can go back to their home country, obtain a license then come to Spore to convert. She replied not sure, but did give me the Traffic Police HQ no. Where I called and confirmed that this is true. I can have a Malaysian license but cannot convert. If I want, have to take Spore test and pass separately. Oh well at least everything is clarified once and for all.

Its a bit too late and uncertain for me to return to M'sia to learn driving... But my sisters can do so. It is also a better alternative given that its abt RM$500 compared to SG$2-3000! I hope to get a job to pay this sum soon.

ALIEN VS PREDATOR - ULTIMATE FLUKE!

After solving once and for all the driving egnima, I headed down to watch the highly anticipated movie AVP! As a loyal albeit rabid fan of the Aliens, Predator and AVP franchise. I awaited this movie eagerly with all my heart. To watch on the big screen, how two fearsome creatures would battle it out. Forget the humans man, they can be killed for all I cared. Its the fight of the century!

Sign.... Little would I know that it turned out to be a fluke. I had a not-so-good feeling when they announced that the director of AVP is the same director as Resident Evil the movie. Well I dunno his name of what. BUT this I know. When I caught Resident Evil on TV recently, it was one of the crappiest zombie/sci fi I had ever seen, save for Existence (which I crown the most brainless piece of crap I had ever watched in my entire 23 years of life!) U guessed correctly, much of it was crappy and corny. Even in Alien and Predator fights, it was unexciting. The movie didnt adhere to the original spirit and even details of the franchise. Details like blooding on forehead turned to become blooding on cheek. Oh My God! Man, there is not one scene where I felt thrilled. Just like when I watched Resident Evil. My sis remarked that she didnt feel anything when she saw how the characters were being slowly killed off by the zombies in RE. For myself, I even laughed in a few RE scenes cos its so crappy, not credible and downright ridiculous.

Err so I laughed at a few scenes too for AVP. Didnt feel much of anything for the characters who are slaughtered and descicrated by both Aliens and Predator. Even my much admired Alien Queen looked so duh in the end. So me and my bro came out of the cinema with a bitter bad taste in our mouths. Criticised the movie for all lack of details, unrealistic time frames in the story. Catching the AVP movie was supposedly a treat. But it left me tired, unthrilled, disgruntled. "Huan Wo Qian Lai!"

Shortly after I left for tuition.

Hi all, issashiburidesu! (long time no see)
Just returned from M'sia. My hp cannot send sms while in M'sia hence can only read all the messages. It seems u all cannot reach me also. I think must add a 02 infront of my hp number. Now I want to hibernate at home, dun feel like going anywhere else unless necessary... this had been a difficult trip... feel kinda of exhausted...

My japanese name is 山下 Yamashita (under the mountain) 千秋 Chiaki (very fine in autumn). Take'>http://rumandmonkey.com/widgets/toys/namegen/969/">Take your real japanese name generator! today!
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Interesting. Yamashita Chiaki for Yenn. My impression of the name using Mandarin translation: Shan Xia Qian Qiu = Forever trapped under the mountain.... Duh, what kind of auspicious name is that? Tahendesune, hope it is not true man. I dun mind being under a mountain of money though. :P

Rat Encounters of The Worst Kind

Me and my parents went back to M'sia over the previous National Day weekends to fix up my IC. We thought that since its the only time my Dad could spare to send us back, its a good time to hop down to the immigration office to make the Smartcard IC. (the current IC is going to be phased out, have a deadline to finish. Due to several fisacos previously, I am the only one who has not made mine.)

BIG MISTAKE! While I missed the rag in NUS, and headed back to M'sia via the Second Link, there was a MASSIVE JAM on the bridge. We had only cleared half of the bridge then jam all the way until the M'sia Customs. It took 3.5hrs! In that time, my family would already have arrived.... Sign. So it was a long journey indeed. We left around 1030h and reached at 1730h.... Sign.

Okay after reaching 'Home', went into the room.... and found that our room had been RAT INFESTED!!! Although non of the previous occupants could be seen - otherwise I was tempted to drown them, but they had conveniently left souvenirs - droppings and lots of it everywhere and urine.... the place smelt like SH*T literally.... Okay so there was a massive clean up and detox operation. Me and Mom cleaned up most of the room that day. It was unbelieveable! Everytime I sweep a corner, more rat pooh would be uncovered. Everytime when I thot I had gotten that last one, one pooh would magically appear... Then had to use tissue to pick up. Then clean up took us 3 afternoons to completely obliterate pooh and the ammonia smell in the room. Did not clean the whole day cos there was still the issue of IC making....

IC Fiasco Episode II: Bureaucracy Reloaded

The other main event was the IC making episode... This was my third attempt to make the IC. Previously went back on another long weekend, got jam, but no rats. Went to the immigration office twice, both times couldnt get the number.

This time, when we went down FREAKING EARLY on Monday morning around 7.30am, there was already a long queue. Later one of the officers came out and told us that their systems are not working. But can still take numbers. There were alot of queue jumpers also.... So ended up with a number but no work done. At first the plan was for me to finish fixing up the IC on Mon afternoon and come out to Spore but circumstances dun allow. So from 8.30am onwards, we travelled down to and fro to the immigration to check up the status of their systems repair. To no avail. Then me and my mom stayed back a few more days to 'get the IC done once and for all'. So this routine repeated itself on Tues and Wed mornings. Finally got it done... *PUKE BLOOD*

If my friends thot that I go back to M'sia to enjoy life... This is definitely not enjoyable....

Tarots and Games

The only consolation for this trip was that I bought a Tarot pack for RM$36. Not the best material type but I quite like the Designs. The book is quite detail and offers different types of arrangements using the Major Arcanna and Minor deck. Though the book is in Chinese, still okay lah. I feel it explains better. The other plus was I got some Yugioh comp and PSII game titles. "I am the ruler of the Game."

Home-Bound

I am a trapped princess (or if u like, monkey) locked away in a high tower in the far-flung reaches of a faraway land. Where is my Saviour? Where art thou, the one with whom I realize and taste freedom. (Peanuts or Bf? well u guess) Am I bored? Not really... just am feeling a bit aimless. Its a good break from being too narrowly focused on something. Its a nice feeling that I dun feel 'compelled' to do certain tasks cos I have no choice. In fact at least for now, I have the choice of the things I WANT to do. My time and schedule is my own to fill with things I want to do, dun mind doing.

This week marks the second week of being home-bound. Starting to feel lazy and undisciplined already. Still have a mountain of tasks to do. Current victories so far are: finished tidying up my bed, reading Sandman comics from Tab and updating resume. Unfinished business include: Tidying up table, shelves and closet that are overfilling with clothes and comics. Yep a common phenomenon with comic readers is that u just dun have enough shelf space. (I have an entire set still lying on my bed) Like Candle, whose room is being renovated, I have major clean-up Ops. And like all lazy pple, just wondering when and how do I kick myself to get started? Sign. Just feel like lazing around. Getting up early to look at the beautiful sky, complete with all the fluffy clouds and brillant sun... playing my guitar and going back to sleep...

Currently just watching Shaman King the anime again. Will dig out some other movies and stuff to watch. Eagerly anticipating the Alien vs Predator movie. As a sci-fi fan, especially one who loves Aliens, Predator and Alien vs Predator, I had supported this franchise for many years. In fact I have the entire novel series. Other stuff I did so far was learning a few more guitar chords, recently mastered 'Vindicated' from Spiderman 2, huang hun. It seems that whenever I touch my guitar after a long absence, I've improved somewhat :) If I can be good enough to start a band *dreamily*

Other stuff include some excel fiddling, flash and html. I've gotten the notes and stuff, just havent gotten started... Then these few weeks will be kinda hectic. Intensive tuition 3 times a week. My plans for the coming weekend was to go down to SRC at NUS for the annual Rag performance. Its something I go down annually for. Too bad cannot make it this year. My sis is in the O-Week and she did mention that this year, a lot of probs for the Bizad club. Well just wanted to watch youthful, creative and energetic performances. Everytime I watch the performance, I remember the time where I first enrolled in the FOC. It was really fun! So I dun want to go back to M'sia to make my IC and ATM. Damn!

And the friends I made there remain the ones that I work and have fun with throughout Uni life. These same pple are the ones I still keep in contact after graduation. Went down to Tab's place last Sunday and saw the Taman Negera Victory Photo at her shelf. It really fills me with warm memories... Those stuff that our gang FWFC did seem like a life-time away, though we didnt participate much in other activities but organized our own. They were so much more fun, interesting and character building. Growing up pains? I guess its a transistional period... and adjustment at this point.

FWFC - Flung With Flying Colours

That is what we called ourselves back then in Uni. The group was formed somewhat from the Freshman Orientation Camp. Somehow while doing up the Bizad float, me and krynnder being in the same OG, started chatting up with quetzal and Tab, all who are in the Intracies Section. Later with some supper, flag, rag and the nite out at Samsara. (heheh remembered Tab won the Most Romantic Letter), friendship was forged. Through lecutres, got to know Candle and some others. The rest is history.

Then in Year 1, I wasnt most social, and too focused on academic pursuits. Later on, I decided to be more open. To try out more stuff, to participate more with friends. From JC onwards, I made a conscious decision to change to become more extroverted. Though at times I may seem quiet and socially inept. Its already a vast improvment. Hope to become much more. I did many things I dun regret. Looking back, I wished I had done so much more.

Aside from the birthday celebrations: karoke sessions, dinner cum sabo, barbecues. These events have been MOST memorable.

FOC - Tab's love declaration, Clubbing, Float Building, Flagging from dawn to dusk, midnight suppers at Fong Seng, Cheer fights.

Taman Negara - Tab's Curse of the Bat Cave, Nice Coke after a hot trek, a trek full of complaints and leeches, sky full of stars and shooting stars, a beautiful and misty morning, missing the bus episode.

Learn Guitar - Learning songs like 'Happy Birthday' then slowly got better.

Lived in Hall/Apt - Late night jogging with Quetzal, did only healthy things like cooking, watching tv, jogging, dinner at the different faculty canteens - No supper, no clubbing and no drinking. Unbelievable! Late night virtual trading of the stock market.

KL - Ramy's burger, KL Petronas Tower, Ace, Trenchcoats Galore, Jolly Shandy.

Redang II- Snorkelling and seeing actual fishes, Night of drinking and 'cai quan', beautiful night with 'moving' stars, nuahing with alcohol at the Cafe, doing nothing but staring at the sea and feeling the heat from the sun and the warm breeze that sweeps by.

Graduation and Equinox - Drinking to celebrate, enjoying the view from the 64th storey.

If anyone asked what I did in my Uni life, these are what I did, together with the hanging out daily thingy at the Bizad or Arts Canteen, birthday celebrations, shopping experience. I may not be able to remember every little details/jokes/fun that we had. But definitely it was a different experience and worlds apart from the things I did in JC. So much more freedom and discovering. It was definitely an enjoyable and engaging journey. I will look back at them fondly.

As I cannot live in the past or future, I have to live for the MOMENT. Want to create more memories that I will look back, share with others about. Hmm then how shall I get started? Well tom, I shall kick myself to tidy up my table. :P