Today is Friday and officially 4 bloody LONG mths as Internal Bleeding! When I realize that 4 mths r up, I dun know whether to be proud that I have lasted so extremely long (Survivor wannabe) or to feel sad when I know I have remaining 2 mths to outlast... Sign.

The most irritating thing abt being a temp or intern is the lack of leave. Without this, one risk being burnt out pretty fast, as one works almost on all weekdays throughout the year, surviving on that bit of public holidays.... this is really not enough. So for those job seekers, at least look for contract jobs with benefits esp leave! I really feel burnt. I can feel it, the feeling is so like my temping days. The 3rd and 4th mths barrier are really testing times and milestones if one can last through.

Well So in another 42 working days, I'll be free.

This week's events

MC

Got gastric flu n went to doctor and got mc. Finally a day of rest. Used some time to read and sleep. But again, when I went back to work, the episode repeated- have to finish the prior day's work. Collegues from my initial unit asked if i felt better or what happened. The current ones just ignored me. I dun care for them anyway. So just did my work, but unfortunately asked to do alot of physical work, which involves carrying heavy stuff. I really count myself lucky that I have more strength than a normal gal otherwise surely die. But I did 'shirk' a bit as I still recovering.

DEBT COMES N GOES

My tuition grant debt came riding upon an innocent envelope, at a sum of $18k, I almost had a heart-attack when I saw that. Then discussed with my dad, he would let me waiver the amount from CPF. Before that, I was still trying to work out a feasible and realistic repayment amt... No high pay nor perm job, so I really had a headache. Well the next day, called CPF and asked if waiver is possible, and it is. Hence as quickly as the Debt came riding into my life, it rode off again, to come another day. Talk about complicating one's life. Grateful to Dad and hope to pay him back soon, when I get a REAL job.

FREEDOM OR OUT OF THE FRYING PAN INTO THE FIRE THEN HELL?

My Sup came and told me briefly the plans for me for the next 2 weeks. Will be out of current hellhole after this Friday. Freedom!!!!! or is it? Looking back at my earlier entries when i was working there? Is it really Freedom? Or just out of the frying pan (previous) into the fire (current) and then to Hell (going back there) Sign... The funny thing is that even the temp knows of this plan for me, AND the subsequent arrangement for me? Huh? U see the whole dept knows of what will happen to me except ME-the person who will be affected by this arrangement? How do I know? Well though I dun talk much in office, I listen alot. Since I cant ask qns to learn, I learn by observation n listening. And when they refer to me, they dun use name and suddenly lower the voice or just point.... So rude right? But I listen, know and notice... just bo chap these types of pple. U r not interested to know me personally, the feeling is mutual.... I just dun want to be thrown back again..... Just glad to be out. The initial unit pple r very reasonable pple... they expect u to work, but they care to explain the process for the task that u r doing, and they would remind and point out the mistakes, unlike this Bitch who scolds, reprimand using a damn irritatingly sharp and condescending tone... Just keep putting me down for every mistake. That is why my life was really hell. Nothing can please. Always why not fast enough, why make this mistake, why do this instead, go do this, go do that. I was really treated as a dog or so... Even Kelvin felt that I was being bullied when I told him some of the stuff I had to do... Well I am just counting down, sending out resumes and working at other areas that will aid me in the future.... For now I will just keep on my toes when I go back on Mon.