Yar so far nothing has come out from my Totoing and 4Ding and even Big Sweeping ways. A miss is as far as a mile. Anyway yar good things just dun come my way, call it my negative way of thinking... Lemme show u some examples and TRY to put it in a positive outlook, judge for yourself...
Eg 1- House master fell ill so newly appointed, very greenhorn asst house master, moi, has to take over everything... Brand new, dun know how things go.. just whack.
Positive thinking: Yay, a chance to SHINE. Now is my chance to showcase my managing skills and do a good job. This will let mgt notice me performing (tricks) *beat chest, shake tress and making monkey noise*...
Yar u decide. Already very busy from cca and courses, still got additional shit, until kena huge backlog of marking... who really notices? At most I write into epms lor.
Eg 2- Kena arrow for some course then got to do lesson plan plus conduct a actual lesson plus get it filmed. Supposed to be team effort. Have lucky draw,kena to be filmed. In the end, all couldnt make it, only one helped to discuss, who did the lesson plan, the ppt, the preparation and printing of resource and conducted the lesson for filming? Moi...
Positive thinking: Yay, a chance to get noticed. Mgt will notice me doing the work. If I do a good job, will propel me in my job. Become a better educator...
Yar I can do WITHOUT any extra crap... why keep on getting it. I already very pock-marked from the amt of work shot at. Uber sian.
Yar tomorrow whole day will be taken up by that course again. No time for rest or marking... Do I have to go back on Sat again?!?! Its killing me... Its not that my time mgt is poor. Its all these things after school that takes up so much time, either 2-4hrs that there is no time inbetween to mark at all. How can I clear? Duh? Stupid service. Why is there so much of such stuff/programmes that either is supposed to make us better educators, but takes so much time and energy that strings are cut elsewhere. And academic suffers? Losing the point... Dunno abt this weird and incomprehensible cycle of thing happening... Am getting too tired to care or struggle.
Trying very hard to pass 1 day at a time... Not to think so much, so that 2yrs 2mths will pass quickly. BUT its kinda hard. Cos everyday is so long, so its like DU RI RU NIAN (each day is like a year). Only consolation, this week I have been putting off starting cca, running off earlier. Though on monday I seriously did 6hrs of admin stuff at home, tues, i ran off around 4pm, today ran off near 3.30pm for medical appointment. Tom cant run, sure 5.30pm one. I tried to get more rest. Reach home, so tired that I just concuss and wont wake up til near 11pm. Then wake up a bit, and go back to sleep near 12am. Next day, wake up tired still... What is this?
Friday is a dilemna, whether to stay to clear or run off to enjoy and go back sat, or clear on fri and sat. The TGIF is very strong on fridays... The Mt Marking is still very high. I have yet to ascend to the halfway mark.
Well tomorrow is another round of TOTO. See if the reclusive lady luck would smile benevolently upon this soul. Going beyond the hundred millionth chance and winning redemption OR the bloody stockmarket to start crashing like Black Friday... so that I can go in, instead of shooting up like now.... So after half to one year, I can kiss this all goodbye...
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