What irks me recently was two Friday ago, I didn't use the umbrella under the cloudy hazy non-sunny time of 4pm for just a mere 10-minutes duration.
And the next day, I woke up to a nose badly-swollen, unsightly pus-filled pimples starting to form all over. I had agreed to meet Tab n husband for Suki-buffet lunch. So I put popped some and put on a cream.
Let's just say by evening, after reaching home from dinner. I looked into the mirror to an even more serious case of pimples on the nose. Almost all the pores on my nose are painful, pus-filled pimples that hurts. Omfg... Pricked those with a needle head to get the pus out and slapped on the Oxy cream.
The next day, a Sunday, I had to head out to IMM to fix up the Internet with mom n sisters. So I covered up the nose with the Oxy cream. With the tinted cream, at least it covered up the ghastly sight... Still having pimples developing...
While I was there, I bought an untainted Oxy n an acne cream which was tinted. When I reached home, I washed off the Oxy, washed the face n put on the cream. By late evening, not so painful.
Mon, I had to go to work. By then there are still some pus pimples and some starting to dry up. I put the tinted acne cream over the nose. Told students straight up briefly about my colored-nose cos it was kinda obvious and I expected to have to put it on for several days.
By Thur, the pimples dried and the skin flicked off... Only to reveal the fact that ALL my pores on the nose are now BLACKHEADs!!! Wtf... Can't just go squeeze them all out cos that would leave scars... As if those pimples earlier didn't leave scars...
So, bought Pore-pack for women. Put it over my nose on Sat. Left it on to dry for an hour instead of 15mins. Pulled it off and stared in shock n amazement at the huge number of blackheads pulled out... It was like all sides of the strip had hard blackheads. This is the most I had ever pulled out from my nose ever.... The worst part was that when I looked at the mirror, there were still many obvious blackheads all over the nose still. Man... So have to keep this up.
This is seriously a very bad experience and the worst case of acne?? I ever had so far. It's kinda disturbing that there were signs of spreading beyond the nose area. Some parts of my T-zone are affected also whereas last time there wasn't.
All these meant, I am NEVER, ever going under the sun without an umbrella until it's safely 5pm... Rather be an "aunty" with an umbrella than suffer this kinda of double-scarring experience again... Bleah
Sunday, September 23, 2012
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Thoughts - trying to sort issues bugging me out positively
Several thoughts on my mind, from things that arose.
1) The extra $300 monthly plus $5k upgrading, I had thought through and decided on my plan.
For the $5k since it's to be put in by 2-3 years time, the next time the stock prices dip low enough, I will throw in $5k extra to buy the shares that I will manage those to get profits (excluded from my normal portfolio) and use that to help defray the $5k itself. So if I can make $1k profit, then it meant just a dent of $4k on my reserve and so on.
The monthly $300, I will incorporate into my monthly budget n end up with 50% less spending money. Just have to be frugal in dining outside, not every meal is restaurant/cafe. More hawker, coffeeshop style for me.
I also remind myself that I should enjoy the fruits of my labor (work), n not become a Scrooge or live in some type of post-70s mentality... That is so common whenever I look at my dad n the family back in Msia. Yep so if I need to buy something, I still will.
Like how I just bought a new 23 inch LED TV, plus a small tv fan just yesterday cos my tv died on me. The irony was I was at home. No one jio so contented to stay at home, save money. Next thing I know my tv died, forcing me to be extremely bored, have to spend $$$ and next day have to go out to get one. But once I set up my Tv, I don't have so many things I wanna watch... Irony. Nevermind, tomorrow then I try the PS2 on it and see how. Can restart gaming?
2) Thinking about work. It has it's pros n cons, and being human, a pessimistic one, we often focus on the cons, specifically the pay. Well local educators getting a pay raise. Me? The fact that everyone is on a yearly contract renewable makes me feel unsettled. Well I do consider finding a job to settle into more permanently, I am not sure if I'll be renewed... The last resort would be to go back to the system.
I remind myself to look at it on a more positive side; reduced admin, marking, nicer milder students generally, close to home, fixed hours, pure holidays.
Considering these, it's not bad. I am somewhat happier though it is kinda lonely cos I don't do small chat, so kinda stereo-typed in some way. Plus am I burning my bridge?
Yet everyone of those whom I worked closely with n know me, are almost gone... Every year gotta work with people who leave in batches... The 3 year cycle is almost up. Meaning those who joined at the same time as me, would have left by end of this academic year. Kinda sad.
I focus on finishing my work, going the extra mile for students, making their lessons more interesting and making activities that are skill-specific to somewhat fix the language deficiency I see. For those, I think I do a decent n good job. Who would know about that? I dunno, I don't go around and blow my own trumpet like some... Well I got an observation coming up, let's see if I can impress. But I still have some parts to prepare, can only do on my lighter days. Tom is get through the heavy day, make some lesson ideas into actual soft-copy ws / activity cards.
3) Health n aging is one of the main reason why I decided no more assignments unless it's super close to me and only once a week. Cos doing twice cuts out a lot of time for other things in my life. The extra money is welcomed but not the fatigue.
Having to work "2-shifts" is something I did since the temp days prior to joining teaching. It was something I could do then but I find my stamina falling as I age. Finally reached the point where I decided not to do it for an entire year. See if the lack of that income impacted me? Can rest more, have more time on hand, could pursue a course, do work-out, sleep etc.
I kinda enjoy the extra time n not the burden of having to rush after-work to head to assignment. Now I squeeze the public transport only cos I'm heading to town. Can take bus leisurely at my own pace.
The extra $$ could have helped defray the $300 but as it is, I am nursing my health though Chinese TCM, weekly consultation, twice daily brown powder meds, abt $200 a month. I don't see the need to go pia so hard to make extra $$$ only to spend $$$ to nurse my health if it dwindled thereafter. Totally not worth it.
It's great that my hair drop reduced some, still have but not like the worst. Also my sense of heatiness is abating, meaning I don't always feel so thirsty n heaty n keep having to drink water incessantly. That is a first for me, so it meant this sinseh is power.
It's a plus that finally after 1 year's effort of calories tracking and reduction, I have acquired the discipline n ability to make life-style changes eg cut down on iced cold drinks drastically. So that is helping me out in managing the health aspect. Man, but knowing myself, I still can't stop immediately. Into my 5th week of monitoring my icey drinks n limiting them consciously, I have reached the lowest of once-a-week. Will aim to keep to that first then move to once-every two weeks. That would help my cough a lot.
Need to work on my late nights gradually too. But that one I think work helps. Forces me to sleep earlier gradually. Still about 1am for now, soon it will go earlier as tiredness comes into play.
4) As for the bigger and wider issue of how to live this life better? A single life also and with it the series of issues n problems accompanying.
That I have no answer for myself. Whether I like it or not, everyday passed is the way I am living this life. Only with hindsight, can I see myself more clearly.
But one thing I've learnt from that time of being burnt-out, quitted, family problems is that things kinda do resolve with time just whether u liked the outcome with hindsight. Every step n decision made us somewhat the answer we seek, cos it leads to the outcome n pave for the next step. Hence the quote I saw "Life is led forward, not lived backwards". Guess this means that not knowing what you want, having doubts n fears are normal things to face. Think everyone struggles with these. What this meant for me is, I can only go along with it, make the choices, struggle n hope for the best.
1) The extra $300 monthly plus $5k upgrading, I had thought through and decided on my plan.
For the $5k since it's to be put in by 2-3 years time, the next time the stock prices dip low enough, I will throw in $5k extra to buy the shares that I will manage those to get profits (excluded from my normal portfolio) and use that to help defray the $5k itself. So if I can make $1k profit, then it meant just a dent of $4k on my reserve and so on.
The monthly $300, I will incorporate into my monthly budget n end up with 50% less spending money. Just have to be frugal in dining outside, not every meal is restaurant/cafe. More hawker, coffeeshop style for me.
I also remind myself that I should enjoy the fruits of my labor (work), n not become a Scrooge or live in some type of post-70s mentality... That is so common whenever I look at my dad n the family back in Msia. Yep so if I need to buy something, I still will.
Like how I just bought a new 23 inch LED TV, plus a small tv fan just yesterday cos my tv died on me. The irony was I was at home. No one jio so contented to stay at home, save money. Next thing I know my tv died, forcing me to be extremely bored, have to spend $$$ and next day have to go out to get one. But once I set up my Tv, I don't have so many things I wanna watch... Irony. Nevermind, tomorrow then I try the PS2 on it and see how. Can restart gaming?
2) Thinking about work. It has it's pros n cons, and being human, a pessimistic one, we often focus on the cons, specifically the pay. Well local educators getting a pay raise. Me? The fact that everyone is on a yearly contract renewable makes me feel unsettled. Well I do consider finding a job to settle into more permanently, I am not sure if I'll be renewed... The last resort would be to go back to the system.
I remind myself to look at it on a more positive side; reduced admin, marking, nicer milder students generally, close to home, fixed hours, pure holidays.
Considering these, it's not bad. I am somewhat happier though it is kinda lonely cos I don't do small chat, so kinda stereo-typed in some way. Plus am I burning my bridge?
Yet everyone of those whom I worked closely with n know me, are almost gone... Every year gotta work with people who leave in batches... The 3 year cycle is almost up. Meaning those who joined at the same time as me, would have left by end of this academic year. Kinda sad.
I focus on finishing my work, going the extra mile for students, making their lessons more interesting and making activities that are skill-specific to somewhat fix the language deficiency I see. For those, I think I do a decent n good job. Who would know about that? I dunno, I don't go around and blow my own trumpet like some... Well I got an observation coming up, let's see if I can impress. But I still have some parts to prepare, can only do on my lighter days. Tom is get through the heavy day, make some lesson ideas into actual soft-copy ws / activity cards.
3) Health n aging is one of the main reason why I decided no more assignments unless it's super close to me and only once a week. Cos doing twice cuts out a lot of time for other things in my life. The extra money is welcomed but not the fatigue.
Having to work "2-shifts" is something I did since the temp days prior to joining teaching. It was something I could do then but I find my stamina falling as I age. Finally reached the point where I decided not to do it for an entire year. See if the lack of that income impacted me? Can rest more, have more time on hand, could pursue a course, do work-out, sleep etc.
I kinda enjoy the extra time n not the burden of having to rush after-work to head to assignment. Now I squeeze the public transport only cos I'm heading to town. Can take bus leisurely at my own pace.
The extra $$ could have helped defray the $300 but as it is, I am nursing my health though Chinese TCM, weekly consultation, twice daily brown powder meds, abt $200 a month. I don't see the need to go pia so hard to make extra $$$ only to spend $$$ to nurse my health if it dwindled thereafter. Totally not worth it.
It's great that my hair drop reduced some, still have but not like the worst. Also my sense of heatiness is abating, meaning I don't always feel so thirsty n heaty n keep having to drink water incessantly. That is a first for me, so it meant this sinseh is power.
It's a plus that finally after 1 year's effort of calories tracking and reduction, I have acquired the discipline n ability to make life-style changes eg cut down on iced cold drinks drastically. So that is helping me out in managing the health aspect. Man, but knowing myself, I still can't stop immediately. Into my 5th week of monitoring my icey drinks n limiting them consciously, I have reached the lowest of once-a-week. Will aim to keep to that first then move to once-every two weeks. That would help my cough a lot.
Need to work on my late nights gradually too. But that one I think work helps. Forces me to sleep earlier gradually. Still about 1am for now, soon it will go earlier as tiredness comes into play.
4) As for the bigger and wider issue of how to live this life better? A single life also and with it the series of issues n problems accompanying.
That I have no answer for myself. Whether I like it or not, everyday passed is the way I am living this life. Only with hindsight, can I see myself more clearly.
But one thing I've learnt from that time of being burnt-out, quitted, family problems is that things kinda do resolve with time just whether u liked the outcome with hindsight. Every step n decision made us somewhat the answer we seek, cos it leads to the outcome n pave for the next step. Hence the quote I saw "Life is led forward, not lived backwards". Guess this means that not knowing what you want, having doubts n fears are normal things to face. Think everyone struggles with these. What this meant for me is, I can only go along with it, make the choices, struggle n hope for the best.
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