Seems to be somewhere.... more is expected

Hmm after 3 rounds of talks with the P. The first being an improto one, which I was asked to go in. I raised concerns with regards to the course, I thought it was to gather feedback on the course that was planned for me to teach, not anything related to my own terms. So the issues and concerns I raised were solely about those. Then out-of-the-blue, the no lunch-out was requested, that I couldnt rebutt at that time. Just came out 'shocked?'

After, it hung on my mind, for more than 2 weeks. Even into CNY, it was somewhat at the back of my mind. Then I decided during CNY holidays, that I would draft out a letter with the areas of concern then explain the reasons and compromise or clarification needed. My plan was to submit to P and Management so that, they are 'aware' of my personal concerns which arent being addressed. I didnt ask for immediate answers but hope that they would be clarified soon before the contract signing.

So I went in a second time yesterday armed with my letter plus a translator whom I showed the letter to and I talked it over with the P. I would have to compromise on the lunch thingy. It seems that my freedom to go out of workplace freely to eat lunch for an hour is seen by some collegues as being unequitable, not fair. Also it would affect my standing in their eyes. Huh??? The end is that they hope I would try to follow their practice of eating-in as much as I could, and if I have to leave to buy back, I do so discreetly... How discreet can one be when I am supposed to be seated at my place in an open-concept office. Err when I suddenly disappear and appear with a obviously-telling bag of dabaoed food??? Well, I told them as far as I can, I will try to eat in and buy in before work but I cant do it everyday. Its really too much to ask for to do it everyday.

So far this week, I have eaten inside for 2 days in a row. Its cos I have duties that meant shortened lunch of 20mins, hence have to buy-in and eat. Feeling quite duh already. Today I bought a big pack of Nasi Lemak for breakfast, but couldnt finish, so I left the rest for lunch. Eat-in again? I miss a change in environment but guess I have to compromise by eating in more often. Maybe I try 3 days inside, 2 days buy-in or 1 buy-in, 1 eat-out... I miss going out already...

Just 20mins ago, I was asked to go in again. I am not going to be treated the same as the other I-teachers, whose contract differs from mine. He said that my contract type is another, the locally-hired contract. Hence instead of like yesterday, when in the 2nd meeting, he said that I should be treated like the I-teachers, hence the pre-term period, dont need to come back at all. Now it seems I would have to come back still. But he would give an exception, that they would notify me which days I need to come back for certain meetings. Because I told him that I came in last year and did absolutely nothing. Having nothing to do from 8.15am - 5pm is really really very mentally taxing. I had to occupy myself with work, like looking through the files, syllabus, tbs and seeing how simple things were... then my active mind kept thinking of workstuff. So that is a good consideration... though still sian that I cant travel during that period, but its clearer than before, where everything was unclear and when I asked it was out-right come back.

Another issue that was brought up was which department do I belong to. In yesterday's meeting, he said that I should belong to the Eng, but be treated like the I-teachers. But today, it's hinted that I might probably be assigned to a level and be a sub-homeroom teacher. It would mean I would have to be in the assigned class for the before-lesson and after-lesson thingy daily. I told him that this year I was a sub, but I dont have a class, so I help out with the level I was assigned. I also say out my thought that if there are extra teachers and they just assign there to be 2 subs, it becomes very redundant. A better use would be to assign me a level and when any of the subs cant make it, need help, I go in or come along. Also must let the level teachers know that I can help out. That is a more efficient use.

Then that was the end of it for now.

Hopefully they can be more efficient and plan out things that can be a good use of time and energy. I know that for certain, next contract year, I would be much more busy and 'well-used' compared to this year. Also freedom is consequently being reduced. Hope the salary would be appropriate though. I dont want to take on so much stuff and be paid just a bit more than what I am getting now... That is something they are not able to tell me until I see the contract. But what then if its too low??? Dunno.

Its better now that certain issues are being clarified so that I dont have to second-guess, third-guess, fourth-guess everything that is being said. Dont get everything my way but still at least there's compromise and more consideration for the difference in culture and hence the practice. I would have to see how much of it can I stomach...