This thought suddenly struck me just now. I was taking a dump in the toilet. Students are dismissed at 1.30pm, educators obviously not. I dont have much to do really. My solo lessons are over, just finished my last asst teaching class (and that was only cos I scheduled myself in, cos I really dont have anything else) then the rest of the time is free.
Good?
Nope. Its too much free time with no privacy in the office. Dunno what I am supposed to do with myself sometimes. Then going up to hide in the kitchen prep room means privacy but mainly just chatting and playing with I-phone. I feel so sedentary, even my fats are piling up. The whole Zar Chai Fang and my messed-up depraved craving is not helping my waist line. My pants feels tighter. So about 2.30pm, I decided to come down to the office. So I went to the toilet. After taking my time, even surfing Internet inside, I came out and saw the fish tank.
There's a fish tank along the corridor to the toilet, near the office. Most of the time, I dont take a closer look. Today with so much time to burn, I decided to stop and look. There are quite a number of fishes; angelfish, guppies and more, no goldfish. So I saw them swim from one end to another, from the other swim back to one end. Though its a big tank but still the space is limited. Even if swim to one corner, there are other fishes. Some kept swimming laps from one end to another. Then a thought struck me. Isnt that what I am doing now? I keep walking around and hiding up in the kitchen to kill time. Though if I look closer, not every teacher is as busy. Its just I need the privacy of personal space without having to keep hearing Jap for one. Gradually I am finding my ability to slowly 'tune out' a bit of the jap that is all over the place. I find relief in the prep room because I can speak in English without having to consider whether they will understand, I dont hear jap, I can slack in peace. But that's also not a long term solution. Its kinda limiting to have to resort to chatting, playing Iphone, surfing internet via Iphone and in very tiring cases, snooze to recharge the frazzled nerves from the constant on-the-edge esp when there are events and they dont tell you exactly what you are supposed to do and later last min, might or might not have to do.
Like for today, there is a whole period of cleaning. I know that. They gave us each a page full of instructions in Jap with no translation. I looked through it and while I can understand the gist of it, I dunno exactly what am I supposed to do? My level has graduated, so the cleaning of the room I was in-charge, there are no students. So I am not sure whether there would be other students assigned by other level's teachers to come to clean the special room. Mine was a science room. Its not being mentioned on the plan, nor has any collegues come to explain. So I took 5 sponges, 1 washing liquid and the room key. Opened up and sat inside to wait and see. I had the sense enough to bring a reading material "Wattention", my insurance claim forms and my I-phone in. In the end, I sat inside until it was almost over, closed and locked up and returned the stuff. Obviously inside, I was reading, filling forms and also surfing internet and what's apping friends. After that though, I felt tired. Its really these type of non-events that makes one tired.
Also had to help do a bit of "clean up" for a colleuge who didnt come today but last minute Headless eye-balled and saw 2 students comments not done. So I called her and got the grades and comments. Then did up and printed out in 15mins. Bo bian. I dont like to do clean up but I am the one present, the other was on leave. Yup these types of events drains the energy. Plus alot of not knowing, esp with regards to the contract renewal. Specifically the pay issue.
So back to the fish tank. I was looking closely at the fish. Even making fish faces at them but obviously nobody was around to witness cos most in the office. Then I walked back to my seat. I came down and intend to read my book. Its a thick book so obviously not anybody can open my book to see the contents. Anyway its an book about investing in Gold and metals. I want to do my homework on this aspect. A few Ang mohs are not at their tables. They are in their own subject rooms doing their stuff. I have no room of my own and hence feel the lack of personal space plus Headless sits on my left. I am still not used to having a neighbour.
The thing is that even if there is nothing to do, cannot go back early. That is the difference. Its kinda inefficient use of time. If I could have leave earlier, I could go gym, sleep etc. Instead of stuck somewhere hiding to use i-phone (toilet, kitchen, back of school) Its kinda very limiting. I am mostly an efficient person and I get my work done quickly and well, and also when I have more tasks, I do them in these types of lull period, free periods. But inspite of doing all these, still have time to burn. Argh!
I bought 4 x 0.5kg dumb-bells to put at workplace to fight the sedentary. I was just using my right arm to do some weights since I shouldnt be doing left arm yet. Later the plan is to go gym to do brisk walking or cycling and sit-ups. Its kinda boring at the moment.
I am looking forward to the holidays and the true lull. Looking forward to sushi buffet plus spa. Then looking forward to Taipei trip. Looking forward to sleeping late and being really free for a change. Until now, still havent told me which meeting I am supposed to attend. So out of courtesy, I shall turn up on April 1st and then if nothing explicit is said to me, I shall not appear until school reopens. Too bad about more travel but they keep delaying and couldnt tell anything concrete inspite of us asking for clarification, highlighting our concerns and after waiting for a few days, reminded them to ask and wait and wait and wait. We would be told part of the answer and then wait and wait. Sometimes the answers give rise to more questions. Its really more and more wait and wait and wait.
Like now how I am waiting to go home but there's still 1hr 25mins more. How I cant concentrate on reading, how I have already done 2 sets of reps on my right arm and am considering the 3rd any moment.
I have a suddent urge to go do crunches but cant cos not that 2hr after food thingy plus the felt mat thingy I bought is upstairs in the cooking room. If I had known, maybe I should have considered cooking but I felt it wasnt too appropriate to do so too often plus after my mom bought the oven, I've decided to bake at home. More control of the time. Plus home territory.
Signz.
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