To all friends and others, hope ya all have a Happy New Year. Today is the last day of the year 2003. As we are moving into 2004, I would like to reflect on my year past and coming year ahead.

Year 2003 to me is remembered as one of struggles, small triumphs and a lot of hard work. Now as I try to recall what are the exact things that I did- I cant really recall exactly.... (partly due to being sick, down with flu).. Well all that I know is that in the first half of the year, I worked real hard to push up my CAP to try to qualify for the honours, which I didnt.

Then I've graduated. Fresh and wide-eyed and facing the job market, I venture forth to look for employment. That search was not forthcoming cos of my empty job experience. Hence another stage in my life begun, with me taking up one temp assignment, teaching tuition. On top of this, learning jap and piano (thanks to Quetzal, appreciate ur efforts alot) cos I wanna pursue some of my dreams concurrently, many which I have deferred due to lack of time, resources or opportunity in the past. Remember how we always say 'well i will do that when i grow up, and have more $$$, or now dun have the time, will do so later when i graduate...' It is impt not to forget these dreams when one is too caught up by daily routine. There comes a time when U have to take action and not wait any longer, grasp the opportunity, cos they wont be there always. Create the opportunities and take them! There are a huge list of things I wanna learn or do, but currently I wil finish this 2 first before I do others. No use taking on too much if one cannot manage. But quite keen on bar-tending course... but the timing is not condusive... But I do take the oppt to try out new drinks, and note their taste whenever I can, not exceeding my twice per mth quota. Then again, this intense second half of the year was one of trials, esp from the time constraints of juggling temp work n tuition and weekend lessons. Many a times, I felt like giving up and stop struggling with fatigue, strong feelings of unhappiness and helplessness. But somehow I managed. A small victory, though a difficult one indeed. I guess, I have learnt much and hopefully my character will grow in strength and I will develop a strong drive to see me to my goals.

Now as I move forth to 2004, I have a challenging n daunting task ahead of me- another half year of struggle as Internal Bleeding, tuition and lessons. For the later half, I hope to see myself more settled to the idea of work as well as the idiosyncrasies and routine related to working, as well as finding a perm job n earning real $$$. Then I dun have to work this hard for peanuts or peanut shells. New year comes in another few hrs, my resolutions are :
1) To be more appreciative of family, friends and people around me.
2) Exercise at least 3 times a week for more stamina to face work.
3) Learn to live in the present and appreciate every day for its lessons and value.
lastly, 4) To face up to challenges and adversity with a brave heart and persevere to the end. To finish all that I started.

All the Best and Happy New Year! *cough, sneeze* Take care and keep in contact.

Today... I went to work at 8.30am and ended at 8pm..... when I finally dragged myself out of the office, I looked at the sky.... It feels like its going to rain... and the crescent moon looks beautiful though solitary... A cool breeze blew past my face, I feel a bit less wretched. *Sign No $$$ for extra effort or OT.... Man this is not a good deal. *grumbles... what a crap of a monday... I hate printing and editing...

On my way home, a coincidence that I met a former collegue from my previous zoo... Then I complain and lament, after that felt better. Somehow I feel very much like exercising very hard- though I should be careful and not hurt myself. Well tom is sooo very near. Just had my dinner n bath, now brain-dead, stoning infront of computer n tv.... wondering if I should play games, exercise or just sleep... Hmm a drink is super tempting... but then again I am falling ill...

To friends out there, take care, cos the weather is not so good. *cough...sneeze.... (I wonder if I should fall sick and get MC, maybe later... cos holidays round the corner.)

*sign.... just 125 more days to freedom....

sign...The age gap bet collegues is too great... mostly mothers or married... dun even have the energy to interact... cos I feel very exhausted. They all thot I sick or what then they thot tt cos I worked before, so 'should be' used to the hours... Well its been 3 weeks since I last worked... and not 9hr per day type.... Well when I'm tired esp dead tired not to mention brain-still-sleeping mode, I am very quiet... and just do my work-type. There are still many more days to go I guess...

Dunno if I come across as a pessimist but dun really have much positive stuff to say nowadays about the present.. No wonder sometimes I keep on looking forward to the future (more of my days of freedom) or dwell in the past (more to looking back at my days of freedom)...

Sometimes we are all so caught up in our work and other activities that we fail to stop a while to notice how blue the sky is.. how beautiful the sun-rise is... and then realise that u are missing out on something... and signed when u realise that u are indeed small in this bigger world out there... Unfortunately before u can finish ur philosophical thoughts, the bus or train turns into the tunnel.... and u hurry back to the 'rat-race'. To those, I saw this and found it highly meaningful:

"Happiness never comes to those who fail to appreciate what they already have"

It is only after my hectic schedule that only sees me back in home after the sun has gone down.... on days of tuition, reach home around 1030 or later.... on weekends, out the whole day... Not much time spent with family. They are understanding of my hectic schedule, supportive. They are one reason for me working so hard.... esp with regards to getting a perm job. But sometimes I forget to appreciate the time together. I have to keep that in mind... and constantly remind myself to adhere to that. That in working hard, I dun forget what is REALLY important.

Well Merry Christmas to all, though mine is a sad one.... got out of the office around 4 plus, reached home 5, then rush for tuition 6.30 plus. Arrived home 10.45pm... Well not that I celebrate anyway but the so-called 'half day' is really a fraud... and everyday still have to ask if i can go... damn... i feel like a kid. I only feel like either drowning my sorrow and exhaustion in alcohol... or just sleeping. I guess that is the best medicine I can get... Tom I'll just stay home with family and Fri is going to be a LONG day and dinner with JC friends. I should try to settle in but I am fighting it constantly.... cos I dun wanna be caught up in this routine, and be numb abt doing the routine... Many others whom I have met and asked, told me that that is the deal. It is normal to be numb. Job is nothing much more than for the $$ and something u cant help but still have to do chore. But that violates what I want from a job. I dun expect challenge everyday or what colourful days... but just a sense of ownership and responsibility and decision-making. Sounds idealistic? Well guess I havent learnt my lesson well. I am an idealist in heart and still hold onto my dreams.

Today is like my Nth day as an intern, *N is single digit -and I felt as though I have worked a century.... No wonder I am Ancient Spirit. Okay lemme contrast a bit with my former monkey job. Both into ops and one is paperwork and the other is eyeballing and equally manual. Both routine, boring and most imptly low pay and long hrs. Hmm is there this pattern or that I really suck in my choice of employment..... I think so too. Man whatever naive ideas I have in my head, are all like being taken and showcased to me thru my jobs and I am learning the hard way. During the day, the off is so quiet that I almost fell asleep... the boredom and strain of just staring at the screen for hours... then cannot serve the net... cos under survilence.... I still cannot decide whether I like being a paper-pusher or eyeballing expert..... both menial. Though I wont mind a much higher pay... Pay is definitely a motivating factor, not the MOST impt but still among top 3 factors. Others in my list include exciting and challenging job nature and skill competency. I wonder is it becos I am not in my area of interest like Treasury or Investments that I feel so or is it just the true nature of the jobs- a univeral fact that I have failed to grasp..... " Well all shall be revealed in due time..." In the meantime, I have to continue my count-down...127 and counting... will let u all know when the number falls to 30+ days. Then can plan another unemployment celebration....

Now using alot of Office, so my word and excel skills are actually pretty good. Hmm something else to add on to my resume. Phew lucky I can keep my tuition, but have to schedule so no more ladies nite for me.... sob* "I wanna drink and forget all my troubles....*hic....

Thank goodness that there are such things call Public holidays... if not then I really have no days off. Although I only have 6 such days next year, it is still better than nothing. The only thing is tt i dun work sats. I keep counting onto christmas and new year, not that I celebrate them but cos i have to work halfdays on the eves... So that sounds sad right? Dunno, after 3 weeks of gaming and not working, not to mention late nights- I am still not adjusted myself to the working mentality and mode. Dun have the stamina to last sooooo many hours and face the boredom... Please let a miracle happen, U bloody GOD OF INTERVIEWS & JOBS, let me be magically posted to my dream areas.... its always so near yet so far.... or $$$ falling from the sky... or just a good night sleep with dreams of happiness....

Oh onto my beer and spirits review section. The last time me and friends went drinking, I had a Budwiser.... i think thats how its spelt.... It is a VERY nice beer, cos no bitter after-taste in the mouth... it is very smooth, like the Tiger draught... So lite that Krynnder can also drink it. Definitely a good choice for those who cannot stomach the bitter taste of beer. Also just this week, I tried the Becks non-alcoholic malt drink.... basically beer with no alcohol content but still taste like beer, which is SUPER bitter..... the only other beer to match the initial taste of bitterness is Guiness stout, the black beer. But funny enough, after a few glups... it starts to taste better. Hmm for those who are health-conscious perhaps... But yours truely is keeping to max of 2 drinks per mth... so still have one more for this Dec..... wink wink...hint hint...like real..

Err I was supposed to put up this entry last nite. (sorry to those who tried to read it last nite...)
Okay so now, instead of being a Monkey, I am now an intern (Internal Bleeding). How did that happen? Well sometime back I got the internship details from friends and applied for a few. So just on Mon, the Company called at 5.45pm. Told me that I was selected n whether I wanted it. Okay Great I thot happily.... the caller told me the official hrs and suppose to yesterday. So now I am magically transformed into an intern. A nicer term or so I thot.....

While preparing for my first day on Wed.... I realised that my work hrs stretchs to 9hrs!.... Okay i thot, maybe I can make it in time for my tuition... nvm I will observe first. Then I signed on that dotted line. Pay is low but still okay I thot... at least I got just as much as a monkey... Again if there is this God of jobs n interview out there..... he must be having a hell of a time playing with my working life loh! So there I was, a bit glad to be an intern n not a temp.... went to meet my Sup... was told of having to do project, was the first intern they have, and they OT like xiao, and the temps leaving soon so I have to take over. Just great! #$&$^ At least a temp can claim OT, which is like xiao... but I dun get OT nor leave. NOW I want to be a temp.... bloody hell! So the normal story apply, got to learn n start doing in record time, no access pass, sign in at the counter, and wake up damn early in the morning. I really dunno if I can keep my tuition kid with this kind of timing... So far so good... but I definitely cannot reach my tuition at 7 or 7.30.... Sign. Tomorrow got to learn new stuff, cos I 'overperformed'..... learnt yesterday, today I do already.... Sup impressed, tom got to learn the harder stuff.... They r definitely not paying me enough for such. I work hard cos I dun wanna be idle.... but this pt might be exploited. Maybe I should ask regarding the tuition commitment... Man 129 days more of workdays to my freedom.... The only 2 irritating things are the hrs.... which affect my tuition and the ulu-ness of the place. Man, what was I thinking of when I thot an intern was better than a temp. It seems tt to certain industries, both categories are the same. Well I'll just hope to complete another few more mths of my tuition grant bond.

Brotherhood Prevails.

KPOcumEternalPMS looked smug when he noticed that the Temp Brotherhood had returned with a new ally, a white witch-like lady whom he dismissed as a written off piece of trash. Again he launched into his KPO attacks, noticing whether one comes back late from lunch, go back home early without permission and even checks the male toilets if one is away for too long. To these barrage of attacks, the temp brotherhood suffered and endured, but H stood up for her rights. H would launch counterattacks behind KPO's back. She would argue with him regarding the 'niaoness' and how she was 'specially selected' to work in Zoo #2. So for days and weeks, everyday was a battlefield, everyday there would be incidents of KPO vs H. Until KPO gave up with regards to H, and crawled away defeated. Finally the Temp Brotherhood can continue on their journey to the next obstacle; Boredom n Fatigue. (to be continued.....)

I really hate interviews esp if they come suddenly with extremely short notice. Then I have to quickly prepare my clothes, shoes n lines. Worse still, I still havent perfected my speech- not to mention even prepare for that. Although I had crashed n burn my resume n phone conversation.... this part unfortunately is still undone as I was gaming happily until out of the blue, in the middle of the nite, suddenly one lone call came. In a blink of n eye, i have an interview 1 n 1/2 days later.... sign... Why cant mine come at more normal timings..... usually they come when I am in the toilet n late at nite or bloody early in the morning. At these times, my mind would not be as sharp n would either just reject or screw up. They should at least call before or after lunch. So now I have less than 24hrs to prepare for the speech.... sign.... No wonder I have a tendency to screw up.

The old lady looked at Monkey Hell, and laughed in a hoarse manner that sounded like a car engine starting. No wonder no evil dwells here. No one could stand that noise/voice. Having lived in the forest for centuries without conflict, the White Witch, or H joined up with the Temp brotherhood for adventure. But both Monkey Hell n X have to cover their ears and grit their teeth whenever H tries to start a conversation or laugh.... Poor them....

With their newest ally, the Temp brotherhood ventured forth towards Mt Heeheehaha to face the remaining member of the baboons that stood in their way- KPOcumEternalPMS..... (to be continued)

An additional part regarding investments into endowment funds esp for Kheldar:
Okay so how did I end up having an endowment fund? Well it happened a few yrs back when I was depositing $$ at my bank. Then the counter people diverted me to one side for this endowment. (Please say NO to them) And I thot that it was okay, saving $100 per mth n 'investing' (please note the '') the idle $$. But after I signed the dotted line, n read thru the whole policy n fineprint n do calculations with my financial calculator..... The whole deal is not attractive at all. The only thing is that luckily mine was a savings endowment, plain type not those exotic structured ones linked to exchange rate etc.

Why? First off, U feel the pinch of $100 less per mth in terms of cash. Even if u pay annually like me, there is a pressure to put aside $100 or the full sum at least before the end of the year. Otherwise it would eat into my bank ac. I hope u all understand what I mean. The money in ur ac is liquid, u can withdraw anytime. But your 'savings' in the endowment cannot be withdrawn.... u can by either surrendering ur policy with huge huge losses, or wait until u can withdraw ur yearly premiums. Which is stupid cos u are drawing out your capital- a big no no in finance. On top of that u lose the extra bit of interest on the premiums if they r not withdrawn. So DO NOT rely on this as a 'saving' ac. It is NOT ONE.

Second, while the IDEAL PROJECTED RATE OF RETURN of the policy is nice to look at.... it is but an assumption based on the highest end of their estimation n is not the REAL rate of return. So dun expect to get as much as they promised. Really think abt how they derive their figures, not just for this but for the numerous types of investments or loans outside. Are the gains or savings for REAL? The most that one can get out of the savings endowment policy is your capital n gains which are subjected to deductions of mgt fees, insurance blah blah....not to mention inflation as well as economic conditions. Most imptly of all is the OPPORTUNITY COST. U might wonder why is this opp cost important. Just say that u really need the $$ but dun have it, cos all locked up in the endowment.. That is why this type of 'savings endowment' CAN NEVER substitute having real cash in the bank. There was this oppt where I couldnt invest in more shares cos a chunk of my $$ in this policy, so in the end, made lesser profit, though it was only once off event. (happened long time back already.....)

Lastly, it SUCKS big time, whenever they send u letter for payment. Which is bloody painful. Cos I see my bank ac shrink. But besides that. I dun expect to see that sum of money, in my case $30K, until I am like 43 yrs old. Lets think for a while. Do I need that sum now or in the future? For the future. would be what most think, but I like to ask u a qn. Will u have that sum already in the future from working n ur own savings. It is very likely. So 30K then may just be a small sum, compared to what $100 per mth or $1200 is to me every year.

So in conclusion, mine still have 22yrs to go. That is very long. By then I believe I would already have more than the endowed amt. Fortunately for my case, the sum offered is not in the ten thousands, and I can meet their yearly premiums n it is not too heavy a burden. And I wont have to worry if I die bf the policy matured, cos the sum is not huge. I wont have to really defer all my expenditure for 25 yrs so that I can 'consume' them in the future. But still it is a constant IRRITATION for me to put aside $$ specially for it, on top of my personal savings, loans etc. So nowadays if anyone tries to sell me a policy, be it insurance or whatever, that person will get it from me...esp if it is unsolicited.

Temp Brotherhood's New Ally

After narrowly escaping from the intense battle with KPOcumEternalPMS, the Temp Brotherhood of the Monkeys ended up lost n stranded in the Forest of Impending Doom. They have long heard of the forest being guarded by a legendary White Witch, who dwells in the forest; protecting it from the evils of the Great One Eye.

Lost, wounded and hungry, the Temp Brotherhood decided to camp overnite in the dark and errie woods. (if u r wondering, we term it the ladies toilet- the only safe refuge from relentless work order attacks) During the nite, as the forest creatures slowly fall silent; one stirred. She descended upon the unsuspecting campers. Just then Monkey Hell woke up to find an old lady in white standing over them...

Hi, I'm back in Spore, after 3 days back in Msia- which was not a holiday, but a torture of unspeakable agony, and mental retardness that I was bored to my tears.... (sign, dun talk abt it now)

So lemme continue my incident report about my temp days: Titled the Middle-finger Incident (funny)

This happened at Office 1, on my first mth of work. I had mentioned that I gotten along very well with the rest of the collegues despite the age gaps which range from 7-15+ years. There is this one particular male collegue, lemme name him Happy, cos he is a very cheerful fella. Always smiling, cracking jokes, making work fun or at least bearable. So though I dun join in, I do smile at his jokes. Then he said to me: "You have a very nice smile." (frankly I dunno if this is true, but maybe cos I dun smile so often- friends can attest to this- therefore my smile is as rare as it gets. Moreever sometimes there must be a reason to be happy to smile, otherwise it is just a fake one like those given by those customer service pple. At least this is my personal belief with regards to smiling n being happy.)

Then he continuously tried to make me smile... he would come up to me and say "Give me a smile", he would smile or grin at me whenever he said that. So despite myself, I would smile. And he would like snap his fingers in triumph. Like he has accomplished something. So this continued for some time. But there was this one day, he kept doing it. I was okay if he did it like occasionally, but whenever he walked in or out of the room n made eye-contact, he would do this routine. So towards the end of the day, Happy tried again. This time, most of the collegues were at the room, and he tried to make me smile again. "So Yenn, gimme a smile", but before I could think, I had already pointed my middle-finger at him- with a straight face, then I smiled. Lemme explain myself, so far in my life, I only pointed the MF at my bro, none at any friends. So there r certain elements about Happy that reminds me unconsciously abt my Bro. Then during the day, he kept on repeating the smile rountine, n whenever I smiled inspite of myself, I decided not to adhere to this rountine. Moreover smiling is something that I rarely did, unless I am happy or what, then of course I was a bit irritated at being continuously baited to smile. Anyway those collegues at the table, were all amused at my response. They did not expect me to do that cos I was well-behaved, shy as well as educated, well same here- lemme me stress it came automatically. And according to them, Happy was blushing. Well that was a Friday so after that, he only did that rountine occassionally. So there ends one interesting chapter of my short working life thus far. But that did not dampen his funny personality. Anyway I do hope to meet more of such funny people, who inject humor n liveliness into the rountine work life.

Incidentally when I was at Office 2, one collegue, also remarked that I have a nice smile. Her words mirror Happy's. Sign so what I thought. Of course it is nice if it is rare n genuine smile. That's my conclusion.

Okay its been a while since my last entry. My humblest apologies to faithful readers of my Monkey column.

The main reason for my longer than usual abscence is the fact that I have been really gaming very HARD. For the past week, have been watching intense anime vcds. Then gaming non-stop on Gunbound- an on-line game. To top it off, I just gotten PS II on Monday, so game like xiao lah. Playing some interesting titles, Harvest Moon (be a virtual farmer) Kingdom Hearts (revisiting all my final fantasy n disney movies n characters). Too bad I cant get Yugioh, or else, I will be the ULTIMATE Pharoh!!!!!! Not to mention the bearer of huge black eyebags. So now I thrive in the other World, of anime, games n lack of sleep..... (so there goes my resume for now, at least until I get stuck at the games, which partially explains why I'm here...) Lucky me n sisters sharing so dont cost that much, but still I bought a pair of work shoes so also broke but feels good to at least spend some peanut $$$ after working sooooo hard for it.

Then another round of tuition has just begun, n I have only 1 kid. So despite my future impending lack of pkt $, can still survive. I hope. Dunno if I can get better paying tuition assignments, but I just let it be. A perm job is still of upmost priority. Er interview conversations still left undone...... though I now sound more enthusiastic in phone conversations. So I plan for tuition on tue n sat.

Will not be around in Spore, for maybe 4+ days, from this Sat. Cos need to go back to 'fix-up' some biz. Sign even if I was paid good $$$, I am still reluctant to go back... alot of stuff.... but I dun want to air dirty laundry. So dun expect me around for any upcoming activities. Dunno leh, like having a writer's block regarding the Monkey advertures- hmm lemme hang around n see if any inspirations come up. Till the next enty. C ya.

hmm great to hear that friends, candle, kheldar n quetzal r all getting something positive in their job search. All the best.

But for moi, nothing so far..... sign. N I didnt pass the Barclays test. Didnt finish all the question so inevitable. And cannot write on the test, very not used to.. but congrats to quetzal. Try your best there. So far, have really been bumming at home, sent out a couple of resumes, n the only offer i had were contract offers, not perms. Which I reject, 2nd time liao. For 1.6k for 1 year. Cos the job nature is really like my former monkey work. I wonder if I could really stand for 1 year. Then I was a bit lost as to whether I should have taken up the offer. At least its something... but I just wasnt really sure if I wanted to lock myself in for so long- then again, few stay for very long in their first job even if it is a perm one. It seems. So as Candle's cards predicted, I asked my Dad for some advise n inputs with regards to this dilemna. So in the end, I felt better cos he lets me decide my path, n so I am still looking for a perm job. It has only been a short week since I quit being a monkey. So I should not rush into another of such assignment unless there is some element that will help me build up my skills for the future. Wise words indeed. Very helpful when I was so lost n demoralized.... Now I feel more confident.

I am crashing and burning my cover letter n resume, cos according to the career service guy, Lawren*e, the first version no formating, not good. Then I used their format, still not happy, say alot irrelevant.... sign... then follow his input.... He is ONE of the cause of my distress earlier.... sign. N I really have to crash n burn my telephone conversation n interview conversations.... so that I do not waste anymore interviews that come along.

On a lighter note. There is this game, called Gunbound. A cute game where u sit in little mechs n launch projectiles at one another. Quite fun, have been playing for 2 days now. First need to dl the game, played over internet. 98Mb. Try for those who r bored. Then I have been watching alot of anime, Hiraku no Go. My sis's one so I dunno if she will lend u all. But its nice, and I am sorely tempted to learn Weiqi, but no master around. Nothing more to report. Still havent fixed up wrist n will try to become chimp asap. Maybe I should go temple n pray.....sign

ISTJ
You're systematic, thorough, painstaking, and hardworking...You get the job done and complete it on time...you are serious and sincere in whatever you do..you work well within a structure...follow the hierarchy...and are particularly strong and careful in keeping track of facts and details... (sounds like me doing monkey job)

Cautious...generally seeking to maintain the status quo...you are at your best getting things to the right place at the right time.... (i screw up so many interviews, got meh?)

Serious, responsible and sensible stalwarts of society...trustworthy and honor your commitments...your word is your solemn vow. Practical and realisitic, you have great powers of concentration....hard to distract once you have embarked what you believe is the best course of action.... .. (So i shouldnt promise anyone anything, since i always lose out?)

You like to apply past experience to present decisions...you can cite accurate evidence to support your views...you're down to earth and seek to do the right thing at the appropriate time...you find it hard to understand people who start an education but don't finish it... (So I live in the past, not the present nor future)

You are diligent and persevering in your efforts...whether it be school, or work, or love...A half-finished job is not a job well done...you probably believe in "Say what you mean and mean what you say." Private by nature, you appear calm in moments of crisis... (cos everything is inside... )

You believe in work before pleasure...(gee, like posting before playing the online games on Storm Palace?)..while you don't SEEK leadership positions, you might find yourself in one...you build a reputation for reliable, stable and consistent performance... (so what is such a hardworking bloke like me jobless?)

You like to schedule....even your LEISURE time! It helps to you if it has a purpose, even if that purpose is sociability...to you, love means bigtime commitment, steadiness and consistency...you behave appropriately for what the situation demands (for example, romantic in the beginning, and so on).. (really? i know that i havent been planning anything recently)

When you give your word and are ready to settle down, you follow-through... you expect your partners to act in a similar manner...you may stay in a poor relationship because of a sense of duty...you might have strong but unspoken reactions under that cool facade... (err no relationships at the moment) Logical and analytical...quick to point out flaws in other people...when you feel scorned in a relationship, you may not let your partner know it..when it's obvious that the relationship is really over, ending it is just the practical thing to do...

Things to look out for: you could immerse yourself in details...you could become rigid in your ways and be thought of as inflexible... don't forget to compliment people and be so concerned with getting the job done....you might overlook the long-range implications of your actions today...don't get stuck in a rut...recognize your emotions, and the values they represent... others might see you as insensitive... (so i am not such a good motivator? But i guess if i can motivate myself, i dun make such a poor one)

Also, you're skeptical of new ideas you don't see immediate and practical applications for...you may impose judgments on others...expect others to be the way YOU'd be...become more tolerant of difference between people. (so i'm weird n want people to be weird also)

ISTJ: "I Save Things Judiciouslyl" (wonder what this means? I save money religiously?)

Just some test results from Khledar's personality test blog, but might be useful for future... Still useful to keep your blog entries up when u dont feel particularly in touch with your long lost brains.

Yesterday went for early Jap lessons, after which I bought a bottle of that Tequila drink, forgotten the name. BUt got some old man face infront. Tasted okay like bitter lemon n the taste blends well with the Tequila taste, cos u cant tell both apart. But the feeling left in the throat feels super-dry. I never tried drinks that left such dryness in the throat. A must-be for drinkers who love lemon+dryness.

Still havent got my wrist fixed up cos my sis not free to go down with me. In the meantime, its just me, my bandages (tiger balm brand) and my wristband (serving as wrist guard). SO in the few short days of unemployment, I have tidied up my table, going onto the room, did up a balance sheet regarding my short temp m tuition to find out exact profits (have some fat), trying to send out some resumes now...err..., threw away some very monkey-related stuff n cleared the trash from accepting all the brocheres, Harry potter order of phonenix n slept like a VERY DEAD person.

Hmm the feeling of staying at home seems so unfamilar.... the last time i did that was 4 mths ago. BUt not to worry, just bought alot of anime vcds to entertain moi.... maybe i should just go n get a PS2 already... instead of waiting... for a sign or my last paycheck *grins

You are Spearmint.
You are quick-witted and sharp. You pay close
attention to details and you can tell what your
friends are feeling. You are always the first
to understand a joke and you are valued for
your insight and advice. However, you
sometimes isolate yourself from other people,
afraid to share your own feelings.
Most Compatible With: Cinnamon


Which Tic-Tac Flavor Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

During my temping days, i always had frooze spearmint handy to recharge. One of my favourite flavours of sweets.

Yenn Hellbound was a Rich Acrobat in a past life. Discover your past lives @ Quiz Me

Born in year of monkey, technically n also WAS a monkey....until today

Today, I inhaled the breathe of freedom as I walked out of the Zoo... n returned my leash. It felt damn good. I wanted to shout out at the top of my lungs- "Freedom!" which I did, but softly. Then i walked to meet up with friends who have come to celebrate this occassion with me. Krynnder got a perm job, n well double celebration- Me unemployed n her employed. Had a great evening with Candle, Krynnder n Kheldar. Ended up drinking 'Wild Turkey'- mixture of bourbon n whisky n coke 8% alcohol. My verdict- didnt really like bourbon taste, much prefer the housepour combination of gin+coke ... tasted like my cough syrup... Prefered the 'Long Island Tea'- mixture of tequila, rum etc... 10% alcohol. So walked around the Orchard area, watching buskers perform. feeling a bit weesy n warm, then again I can really hold my drink.... runs in the genes... not yet tested to its real limit but then again, I have my health n pocket in mind. As I have said to X upon leaving... "suffer too many internal n external injuries... definitely need time to heal..." Will no doubt rest a couple of weeks before my next venture.

Well tomorrow is the BIG day, my day of unemployment... finally after suffering soooo long of untold horrors, still not fully mentioned in this blog. I have reached the Ultimate level of Bo chapness n Stone. "Be one with the stone...." I think i can do that easily. Also become an all-terrain sleeper, can fall asleep on bus, train, work etc n even in the middle of exercise.... Okay there was this incident when i was doing some free weights exercise. I was tired so I took a breather n decide to close my eyes for a while to catch my breathe....going into stomache exercises later *I mumbled to myself....then ZZZZZZZ..... The next thing I knew n saw, was my Mom peeping into the room at 3am in the morning, looking very amused. Apparently I slept lying on the floor, with weights strapped to my ankles. Huh? Then I realized what I done... then i crept into bed. I also master mult-tasking even though the tasks r not related to work; when I'm keying data n eyes on screen, I still know what is going on around me, n can hum some tunes as well as day-dream at the same time n still maintain concentration... *just to indicate how little capacity just plain data-entry takes.... then i tire myself out by thinking tooooo much.

I hope that this period of unemployment will last at least 2 weeks cos some agency contacting me....got 1 mth temp. I dunno if i will take up anymore offers. Much as I tell myself that I really want n need to rest.... but my still empty resume esp with respect to 'work experience' n bloody bond (which still stands at 2yrs 8mths) n my impending cut in pocket money this coming December.... weigh heavily on my mind.... sign (same boat as ya Kheldar) I think I really need some time to sort out my dreams, aspirations, skills n career, not to mention my table n room.... that has been neglected for some 4 months now. But cast those thoughts aside for NOW, I AM GOING TO BE FREE! Just like Kheldar's blog, FREE!!!!!! Hahaha n at least for NOW, NOBODY can take that from me.

"I have locked myself willingly in a cage as a monkey(accepted the assignt) n now I am freeing myself willingly." ..........Yenn Hellbound

Countdown to unemployment n the return to my 'Human Form' : 4 more days. After this friday, 6pm to be precise, I will once again regain the use of my brains, wits, speech, get more sleep, rest, time to bum, play games n read my preciously neglected comics, go out, act my age, n most importantly my Sanity... which was really slipping.... No one ever told ya that temp work is really sooooooo dangerous n degenerating or so counter-evolution that u just 'return' to your roots.... n become a monkey. Now u know how ur ancient ancestors felt.... :P Currently a bit too tired to continue the temp brotherhood of monkeys. But stay tuned next time!

Mini-King; the Temp brotherhood severely threatened:
KPOcumEternalPMS, a thin man in his late thirties (dunno cant tell from the face), shrunken cheeks type n looks very much like the Craven character from Underworld. A big ass cum bully cum KPO cum PMS-stricken.... one who constantly chest-beat to gain attention to the fact that he is doing work (like the rest of us are bumming around n not doing work?) Acts as if he owns the place. So basically the idea is that the type of person u dont wanna meet esp if u have less power.(attack:800, defence:500, Hp:450) a formidable foe indeed.

KPOcumEternalPMS attacked the Temp brotherhood with Micromanaging, constantly jumping on one's errors. Tried all means to find any mistakes made by Monkey Hell n X and have them begging for mercy... He jumped on circumstantial evidence to base his claims of your errors(more details next time) (attack:350) Both temp monkeys were seriously hurt by the accusations or have to endure his nagging... Without letting up KPOcumEternalPMS launched in a series of 'Barking orders', he just enter the room n to no one in particular say "anyone go out and do data entry?" then leave, expecting someone to comply.... Monkey Hell retaliated by hissing under one's breath "U yourself not someone meh?" (attack:100) Monkey X also suffered from the various attacks, both could not last much longer under the barrage of attacks. KPOcumEternalPMS did not let up in his vicious attacks, he evoked the spells of MoreWork and banished the Temp brotherhood to do data-entry, and without letting them rest, sent Monkey Hell to do more eye-balling work, which proved too much for monkey hell that she retaliated "eyes tired, resting now, will do so later in 5-10 mins..." (attack150) KPOcumEternalPMS recovered from shock of hearing these words, as used to silent obdience, threatened "dare u to repeat what u have said to the Great One Eye.." (attack:700) Monkey Hell suffered huge damages n fumed.... Summoning whatever she had, she went n sat infront of the computer screen and SLACKED n SHIRKED from the work (regain full hp) The temp brotherhood could not defeat this monster without help, they escaped.... (to be continued)

Okay its settled, I'm quitting from my temp job n the prospects of evloving into a goriilla is in jeopardy. But the ironic part is that the opportunity might not have existed at all...in the first place. Cos nothing was told to me, not interviewed nor contacted by HR. So i guess i was a fool to stayed on beyond my intended 3 mths, which now stetches to 4mths. Then again I do not regret my decision cos I'm mentally, emotionally and physically tired of that place, people n monkey work. I really need timeout to recharge my being, plus the fact, if they want me, they can contact me while I'm resting at home, not while I'm 'performing' like a monkey/dog at less than 10% capacity. *nose held high in arrogance and defiance. One more week until freedom and I am counting down to the last day where I would definitely celebrate my newfound status as an UNEMPLOYMENT STATISTIC again!

(back to the exciting adventures of Temp Brotherhood of the Monkeys)
Basically MoreWork, HappyGoLucky n KPOcumEternalPMS caught up with the temp brotherhood of the monkeys which so far only comprised of Monkey Hell n X at the forest before Mt HeeheeHahahah. A ferocious battle soon ensued:

MoreWork (attack level: 200, defense: 100 n Hp: 500) attacked with a wave of nagging and ordering spells cast upon the brotherhood to do data-entry. The incessicent ringing in their ears caused them great pains and nearly drove them to insanity (Hp loss: 50). They were forced by the pychic forces to the computer terminals to sit n do the dreaded data-entry work that lasted for 4 hours straight (Hp loss 100 per hour). They would then suffer from sore eyes n back pains, wrist pains from the cramp sitting positions and become temporary retards until the ordeal ends... The brotherhood knew that they had to do something, X brought out an uneaten peanut (weapon status: special effect item) n cracked it open with great excertion (attack factor: infinite). Then she kept the nut n threw the shell at MoreWork with all her might.... It worked! The shells flew into MoreWork's open mouth and lodged in its throat; it couldnt cast anymore spells (hp left: nil, status: defeated)..... Now there were 2 others left.

HappyGoLucky stepped forth (attack level: 50, defense: 20, Hp:300). It tried to imitate MoreWork and started chanting for data-entry work again (attack factor: 80). Before it could finish one spell, Monkey Hell gave HappyGoLucky a killer stare (attack: 200hp) and shrugged of its puny attacks with the office telephone (attack: 300hp). HappyGoLucky was defeated (hp:0, status: defeated).... There is only one more left.... (to be continued)

Philosophical ramblings II
Hmm lemme change the topic to one which I truely can identify with-Philosophy, esp the branch called Existentialism. To those who see it for the first time, u only need to understand this question that clearly defines Existentialism, "Why do I exist?" . After months of monkey work (will continue story another time), I went for the Matrix Revolution movie and really felt like a person again. Hmm when was the last time I really enjoyed myself....doing something more 'normal'? I dun remember... then again when was the last time I did any shopping.....*mumbles and counts fingers.....sign

So anyway the action was much better than the 2nd one, and very thought-provoking.... Then my rusty brain suddenly jumped to life....thinking about the missing gaps in the story, how the parts fit...and most importantly it settled upon the question of my existence.... really my mind just generated thoughts at break-neck speed.... but it felt good though... The following thoughts are all my own, n if u dont subscribe to them, just read for fun...but at least i know these are MY truths.

"Why does one exists? Unfortunately no one has the answer to this deceptively simple question. There are many schools of thought out there yet no one can try to convince u which is correct. Cos your truth cannot be told to u, u must find your own truth n be at peace with ur own answers. What then is my truth....? Frankly I have always questioned my own purpose for existing.... Is there any purpose that I serve in this life? Can I make a difference in this world? What does life have in-store for me and my future. With these chaotic thoughts, I have tried to forge a purpose for me, a goal for my life....which I believed is to make a difference....leave a legacy... Cos I believed that I was a unique n special individual. As life progressed on, and what was formerly black and white became all grey...then these beliefs have to be modified...

I noticed that people are always seeking a reason for their existence, and most found their answers in religion. They believe that this life is a temporary stop to their journey to everlasting life in the other 'perfect world' and that if they follow through with the rituals n beliefs, they can justify their existence in this world and not question further cos they can move on to the other perfect world, where their existence is not questioned. Undeniably this is a good thing cos even if I do not subscribe to any religion, I believe that the core values of most religion preaches the good and condemns the bad. But unfortunately I do not subscribe to the other argument that we are brought into this world to go into the other world.... I have even questioned why does the other place exist? To house the pure souls...? Anyway who built it n for what purpose? I still strongly believe that things exist for a purpose......

Then there is another school of thought- that we each have a social obligation to fulifll in our lives, that if we each play our part, social harmony is maintained. The reason of one's existence is reduced to roles. eg the role of the father, son, son-in-law in the family, the role of the breadwinner, a worker in society. The successful fulfilment of one's multiple roles would have meant a meaningful existence. One where life is a set of responsibilities to be settled in one's lifetime. I feel that this is true to a certain extent on the micro-level, cos we are interlinked in society and bound by the rules of society. Hence to deviate from the social norm, would result in social problems. But is this reason enough to justify one's exisitence? Did I have a choice to decide what are the roles that I would want to take? No obviously, but does it mean that I wake up to life and then these roles define who I am. I have no higher purpose then to settle all these problems that came with life...and hopefully still found 'myself' admist all these... No. I still felt that there should be more....

Before I talk about what exactly is my truth, I want to mention one more group of people... They focus on the individual pursuits to justify their existence... For some, they do not even question why they exist, they seek to focus on the current life, pursuing, enjoying all that it offers. They might not even be aware that such existentialism exist... To them, they just indulge. Others seek to build monuments, be it a leagacy, an empire, achieve greatness and fame to fulfil the last of Marslow's hierarchy of need; Self-actualization. What is that? I would interpret it as another form of existentialism, which is to seek justifcation and reason for one's life. But sadly, this might just be a partial answer at most, becos the end-goal of this system of justification lies in pleasure, fame, achievements, which are temporial. When the event that gave us pleasure ends, we seek new forms of it; when we finally achieved greatness n riches, who is there to remember us after just 2 generations of people; who is there to say that we have led a most rewarding life...when we passed on? Where is my mark on this planet/society that would prove that I have existed? Sadly all these are transient in nature, and passes quickly....

What is my truth? After thinking n searching for a 'higher purpose' for years, I came upon my truth that seems very logical n real to me. Why do I exist? Well, simply there is no purpose for my existence. Humans have long broken free of Mother Nature's Laws, and have instead found means to manipulate the surroundings. Indeed we have gotten out of Nature's cycle of prey and predator, but are not truely freed, cos we have created our own social systems n norms to enslave ourselves. We need some system in-place to function otherwise what are we to do with the additional humans produced, if there is no way for them to 'fit-in' somewhere for some purpose?...That is why I genuinely believe that there is not much real reason to exist, I did not choose to be conscious and to live my life in this world...(this does not mean that I am sucidal n want to say goodbye)... It just seemed that I woke up, to find that I have to live a life. I have social roles n responsibilities, complex interactions that I am just born into. I have to live through my given lifespan n forge my own future...through my choices. I truely believe that even though I might not have chosen life, but living is one of choices, both conscious and unconscious. How do I make my choices? They are based on my personality which is formed from my judgement and knowledge of things. In my choices, I project a personality that defines the 'real' me. I choose 'yes' cos I have my beliefs and thinking that leans towards that choice, the same for choosing 'no'. If life was just a game of 'yes' n 'no', life would indeed be very easy, but unfortunately its not. We live in a very complex world, of social systems and human interactions. Of action and consequences. Very true indeed, whenever we make a choice; be it conscious or not, there lies a direct impact on our lives and an indirect impact that one cannot forsee.... if I choose to wear nicer clothes, immediately I feel good/broke, the future impact might be the change in dress sense, or even getting the attention of the opposite sex. We have no way of knowing the full extent or repercussions of our every action. Then how do I define my existence....? For one, there is no purpose in exisiting in the first place but there might be reasons to justify one's existence when 'living' the life that has been given. If u r the lucky ones, who already subscribe to the earlier reasons, good. But for me, I am still searching by forging through life, though choices get clouded n difficult, that I may find my real self, a genuine reason to define that I have existed in this world before. -------------------------------------------Yenn Hellbound

Hmm my verdict on the Hoegarden beer I had last sat, is that it is nice. Smooth like the Tiger draught of Equinox. But the alot of gas, which is okay given I drink lots of Coke. *grins. Thnks Quetzal's Wind for the treat, though not necessary, but still nice anyway. Wish u all the best!

Continuation of the adventures of the Temp Brotherhood of the Monkeys......
The last time we left off, the temp brotherhood had just started on their perilous journey.... Monkey Hell n X got acquainted when they were thrown into the same monkey cage, after Monkey Hell started her solidatory journey, swinging there after being told by a light (yup the voice in your head type) that she was to be meet someone there. They founded the brotherhood, to stay sane inspite of the dangers that they face, and started towards Mt HeeheeHahaha.... Along the way, they tried to convert zombies, monkeys into the brotherhood, by preaching of the Great Peanut n Banana out there, in the wild compared to the small measley peanuts in the zoo.

Meanwhile the Great One Eye (bigger supervisor), near the potted plant-who sees and notice all who do n dont do work, is worried... The temp brotherhood are surviving admist the insanity thrown upon them, they are gaining followers and popularity. He calls forth his two minions (supervisors), Fatigue n Boredom, and orders them to disintegrate the Brotherhood who are threatening status quo. Onward they flew, menancingly. They assembled their own minions (yup that is delegation-3 baboons MoreWork, HappyGoLucky n KPOcumEternalPMS) n sent them over also... but to intercept the Brotherhood at earlier parts of the journey while they themselves set up some posts at the later part of the journey. Well when Fatigue n Boredom set up tent, they happily went about holidaying n picnicing n sunbathing.....

Meanwhile the 3 baboons, racing at top speed, caught up with the Brotherhood.......(to be continued)

You are the Figher Femme


Which Ultimate Beautiful Woman are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

No wonder I'm still single. But nice pic though...

Great, just yesterday I was contemplating quitting my monkey job, then last nite my application to Deutsche Bank is rejected.. okay still nvm then this morning after taking the 'talent test' by Stantercharted, I got this page that says "Sorry compared to ur peers, u are considered less successful....thank u for ur interest...blah blah" BLOODY HELL! hey they just based their assessment on that crap of personality test...Excuse me but doesnt brains or other skills matter anymore in this day and age?!? I didnt even have a chance to try out their numerical test.....#%(_#&!*
I went ahead and sent them a protest email.....hope to Hear from them real soon.....as if....

Hey this type of online applications for management trainees by large corporations are really becoming a big joke at the expense of poor candidates like me. We scour the net, signing up hoping for a chance to get recognized and be employed then the recruiters throw this type of smoke-bombs and crap at us. Hey We are just honest graduates okay who studied hard and put in tremendous efforts, not to mention blood, sweat, tears and even our eyesight for that piece of paper. And the biggest joke is that when we go into the job market, all wide-eyed and hopeful with dreams, we are treated worst than some of the low-life....sign I must be too stressed already, too many negative things in one week..... "Yup, welcome to the real world baby!" I dunno if others feel the same but Why is it so bloody hard to get a perm job? Actually contract jobs are a plenty...but in view of perm job openings, I've forgone some....I guess next time, I dont keep my hopes at all and just accept anything that is decent so long as its not illegal.

This week has really been one of the ultimate XIAN- with a capital X one of my lifeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.......................which might not last any longer if I am really insane enough to continue working. (if u r wondering why? Cos I took Kheldar's test on 'How sucidal r u?' and the result says that I am likely to commit sucide the next moment....sign) I guess in another 2 weeks, I will be officially unemployed! Yeah!

Well to begin, today was like yesterday.... early in the morning already in 'hot demand', asked to do this, do that.... Still feeling okay then...then go into the room...then hear one of the elder monkey nag and nag non-stop....my ears hurt....and i am really tempted to tell her to shut her trap! Then they switched off the radio that i was using as a distraction from my growing irritation..... (no wonder I am angst feeling, courtesy of another Kheldar's test)...I exchanged written notes with the other temp n mentioned that I would 'put' on my blackest face and see if anyone dare to piss me off...... no it seems.
Until it was like 3 mins to lunch....cos we were waiting for the clock to struck the magical time of twelve, then some of those apes in the same room just call us, telling us to go outside to do work....that really did it!...Why? Cos they were chatting themselves happily, dont wanna to go out too....then just find convenient people to call out....Just tell them that we were going for lunch already...but really when I got back, my mood was super foul..... Monkey J, who is a hardworking collegue or so it seems but she hides her feelings and thoughts....yet want to find out what others are thinking etc....want in on others secrets....etc, smiled at me, but i stared back.....and just went n do my work....I am in no mood to 'entertain' anyone anymore. Then I got stiff neck and felt sleepy so I tilt my head to my right while typing.....then she asked me why I do that.. I replied 'cos I Xain wat...' She gave me a look like warning me that the Supervisor is nearby, but I dont care.

Despite what others think of me, I am a person WITH feelings.....and if I dont like something, I am entitled to my thoughts and views. So if I find work xian, I will say that it is Xian! but I will still do my job inspite of what I feel..... But there is a point where I cannot surpress my feelings anymore. I cannot just pretend that things are okay and live with the lie....I can try to surpress the unhappiness or try to solve the problem. But when it reaches the stage that I have to constantly remind myself not to quit... the reasons why I am working etc....then it seems that if I deny this feeling that is threatening to explode, it feels as though I am killing myself from the inside, slowly becoming 'Numb'. At least I wanna be truthful to myself. It seems that my mind is made up with regards to this monkey job, I will definitely not be around in December. The only thing needed now is the fuse that would cause the explosion......

Hmm decide to digress from the normal incidents to more current ones. In fact these just happened very recently....

Hmm monkey hell is learning quickly about 'monkey (people)-relationship', 'peanut (power) struggle' etc. It seems that each monkey in Zoo No 2 keep their dislike to themselves until the party is not there, then mouth and start condemning them (monkey-stabbing). The undercurrent runs deep that on the surface, it is just a normal zoo with happy monkeys performing tricks gladly for measley peanuts. Then over time as the monkeys 'feel' that u can be trusted, or u suay to be the neutral, mind-your-own-biz type or even back-ground furniture, then they start talking in your prescence. Sometimes the accusations are downright stupid n u feel they just chatter for the sake of complaining. But some are just groundless accusations or genuine complaints that cannot seek redress... Or some just start opening up n pour forth their woes to you (no wonder monkey hell is sucidal.... ;P)

But at least monkey hell is acquainted with another temp monkey, X, who has suffered the crap for a longer time and together they founded the 'Temp' Monkey Brotherhood, seeking to go on a perilous quest to Mt HeeheeHahah to 'evolve' into human form using the Big Banana. It is a dangerous journey that would see them trying to overcome the twin evils of work- Fatigue and Boredom, survive surprise attacks from all sorts of insane creatures that guard the zoo compound feriousciously and litter the path to sanity. Together under the blessing of the One Peanut, will they survive to reach the Great Banana or suscumb to become mindless zombies.....(to be continued)

Incident #2
-This happened shortly after incident one, and involve the same parties.

Lalalalah (music in the background) monkey hell was working when secured bins were delivered for mail disposal. So from then on, no more boxes to use for waste disposal but have to slot waste paper into teeny weeny opening slot. So since monkey hell was the only temp, so slotting job went to her Again. (yup like that was a surprise, no need sherlock holmes to deduce that)

Just her luck that she had to slot two boxes full of papers on that day, so she started doing it (minding her own biz, doing it quickly) A n Good collegue were sitting near to her when she started...

Good collegue: (jokingly) Hey monkey hell, dun need to slot so fast lah, can take ur time loh. Then no need to look for more things to do later mah. Try slotting one piece at a time instead of such a thick pile.....
MonkeyHell: nah nvm, i'll just try to finish quickly.
A:(interuppted) U think temp $$$ so easily to earn meh? (definitely directed at me, no one asked for her opinion)
MonkeyHell: (go n f**k yourself u bloody bitch &#@#$@$) .... (continued doing quickly, then finished in twenty mins)

Verdict: There is definitely some kind of animosity between her n monkey hell though monkey hell did not know why, when or how she ever offended A. She learnt that there are always psychotic, PMS bitches out there in the real world who do not care about the negative impact of their thoughtless words n actions. Again no need to get angry, learn to direct anger positively (by labeling them appropriate names until u r promoted to higher than them, then if they still bully lower personnels, discipline them with your newfound authority, cos unlikely that they will change their behaviour without 'help' from higher authority...."its payback time")

Incident 3
-On one friday, Monkey hell was told abruptly that she will be transferred to Office 2 with effect from next week. She welcomed the news, to get away from the lack of work n A who is such a pain in the ass. A collegue told her about rumour that the Big Boss wanted to observe how monkey hell performed her tricks(tasks), might want to give her Supervisor post. Guessed the rest heard about the conversation. Monkey hell did not believe rumour but is glad to be going to new environment, to do more tricks????

Later, Good collegue n A came up, hinting that after lunch they have something to give me. Monkey hell went out to lunch with another nice collegue. When she returned, got some food from expensive coffee place- pie n dessert. Monkey hell thanked both parties (though she believed that Good collegue paid for the food, n silently cursed A, cos even if A paid for it, is not enough to forgive her for the hurt n anger caused by her thoughtless words n monkey hell did not expect to be given anything nor has she expressed that she wanted anything in return for her short stay). Then A asked why monkey hell not eating, saying that she esp asked for the pie to be heated....(like she is genuinely concerned) and monkey hell replied that will eat later cos just had full lunch.

Later A asked if monkey hell knew how to go to Office 2, n the office number. Other collegues also offered to tell monkey hell how to go there. Monkey hell accepted the advise n info, but noted the sudden change in attitude of A. At the end of the day, though monkey hell was sorely tempted to tell A in her face what she thot of her exactly, but resisted the temptations, cos it was pointless to argue or be seen as unreasonable etc...

So off monkey hell swinged, climbing from branches to branches towards the new Zoo (office) towards uncertain tricks n future...pondering if the peanut would be bigger at the other side or would she have to do even more tricks for the same peanut?

Lesson: No use leaving all grievances to be aired on the last day of work, cos just keeping it all pent up for so long is bad for your mental health. Burning your bridges after crossing them is not the way unless u r not going to see these jokers/monkeys/bitches/pms assholes for the rest of your life. But if u might still be working with them in the future, there is nothing u can do but instead focus on the positive aspects eg coming back as gorrilla (supervisor).

Introd
Today I start off by giving a short introd as to why the term 'monkey' is used in my stories. Well it is a well-known finance maxim that 'if u pay peanuts, u get monkeys.' I found it very amusing when I first learnt it but only recently began to appreciate its simple yet universal truth.

Well as a temp currently, I am paid only S$6.00 per hr and still have to contribute CPF, food and transport so what I have in the end can only be appropriately termed 'measley', or 'peanuts'. Then the job scope is very routine; dull n boring, mostly manual labour and data-entry. Hence termed 'menial' or 'brainless' or 'zombie' work. It was only recently that I started using the term 'monkey work', inspired after a sms exchange with Krynnder, with us coining the term 'performing monkey work in XYZ zoo'. Why is it a zoo? U might want to ask, well becos of all the wierd n funny personalities u encounter, moreover it is a jungle out there in the working world, where back-stabbing, one-man uppership, chest-beating, survival of the fittess or oscar-winning performances rendered by slackers....etc. it really has been an eye-opener for me. I shall try to present the incidents in chronological order, for some, i was involved, but for others, i am just a spectator, but nevertheless, my short working experience has REALLY been one hell of a rollercoaster ride....

Incident 1: starring Monkey Hell(me) n A
-Background: Monkey Hell had just worked for 3 weeks in ABC co in office 1 but did not interact much with A who was hospitalized. Hence Monkey Hell got along quite well with the rest after proving to be a good but quiet n shy worker. This incident happened in the week that A came back. The co had some cost measures implemented, that perms asked to go off earlier, but monkey hell not told to do so. So A got pretty sore. (it affected their salary as OT cut)

One day while in the same room with the rest of the collegues, including monkey hell, she said out loud, "I dont understand why perms must leave earlier, why dont they ask ahem ahem to leave instead? Not enough work to go around....I'm going to ask Supervisor tom...." But she was hushed up by the rest of the collegues. Monkey hell felt demoralized, 'if got better things to do, u think i want to snatch your measley ricebowl meh?' she thought. She was fuming also at this betrayal and outright unfair remark for the work that she has done, mostly with best efforts even if she did not enjoyed the work. Later....nearing lunchtime, a nice collegue came up to monkey hell, n tried to console her saying that A did not meant what she said, (so i guess all the collegues present knew n heard what A said so bluntly), how A was a direct person who speaks her mind. (But it was stilll a damming statement). Later monkey hell consulted agent on solution to this problem, n was told to ignore A. (that didnt stop me from labelling A a bitch)

Well as Heaven is really fair, later A was infuriated the Supervisor by questioning the temp job as well as some other perm issues, that the supervisor later held a meeting the next day to clarify certain issues (but no temp issue came up), When he asked if anyone wanted to clarify anything else more, no one esp A spoke up. So case closed. But from then on A had a condemming attitude towards monkey hell n does not mince her words. (more in future incidents)

The Lesson learnt: if encounter such bitches, do not be unduely affected by their thoughtless remarks. Anger generated by them if directed towards proper means can help one achieve even greater success. And not blowing up the issue and by ignoring (be viewed as the victim) is sometimes the best way for the issue to die down. Which when it does, only serve to enhance your standing and embarass the tormentor.

Some Philosophical Ramblings
Hmm nowadays I am very preoccupied with alot of issues. My mind drift aimlessly through the chaotic thoughts that I have; from money issues, career, my status as a "monkey" earning peanuts, to the next step to take in my life. Sadly I have not reached any inspirational conclusion to my uncertain future. I feel as though I am drifting aimlessly, but I am aware that I do not want to live my life in this manner. I do not want to be caught up in this routine; where one lives each day in the same manner as the one before. Catch the same bus, walk the same route, do the same repetitive work and even have the same lunch. I seek something else but I cannot express what I am seeking. I will know when I finally find it. (Inspired by Matrix or is it just me?)

These incidents are actual people I encounter in my temp work, in ABC company now. First off, after graduation, I have been trying to get a job so as not to add to the unemployment statistic in Spore, as well as serve that bloody 3 yr bond. Sign...sadly things are not to be and I only managed a temp job. Well I have been relating some incidents to my friends and they told me that I can write a mgt book on 'Monkeys and Me, Working in a Corporation' or 'The things they didnt tell ya about working life'. Great idea, now I only need to get started and get a publisher to notice my work...... The next great self-help guru is here! (Only that she doesnt know how to help herself. *Note that she is still working at ABC company as a monkey earning peanuts). Okay I'll start in the next entry.

Well, hi. My first attempt at a blog. Name is Yenn Hellbound.

To start off, I just recovered from a bout of food poisoning. Just picture this, one min you are doing your work in the office and the clock just showed ten, and for the next agonizing half hour, u suffer from cramps, wanting to puke. And before eleven, u have rushed out of office and landed in the nearest toilet, wishing that u dont have to take the bloody public transport home cos u dont know whether u can make it back without leaking.....*sign....I wished that toilet would fly me home instead....anyway I dont want to remember how I ever made it home. Then I found out that my whole family is afflicted, must have been the dinner. Dunno why it didnt acted up until u are in the office.... Anyway feeling better now.