On the whole, 2010 has been a positive year for me.
Looking back at the entries in Dec 2009, I was unemployed then. Feeling a bit lost and hoping for better tidings. Partly anxious about jobless status, partly getting rubbish offers. Things change for the positive. By Feb, I had made enough money from the stock market to cover the 'salary' for the first 3 months. I was working flexi at FH's office. Then in April, I started working full time again. Though it was a pay-cut, it was the best offer with the extra perk of being close to home, hence drastically cutting down travelling time. Plus the working hours, though longer than previously, saw me out of the house after the sun has risen and knocking off when the sun is still in the sky. Work wasnt so much that I couldnt leave on time. In fact, sometimes too much hours that I go look to make more resources, and even started baking, got along well with collegues that I can get a few perks here and there. Though there are some bumps along the way. I guess no workplace is perfect. So looking back now, I've come to realize that I can count myself lucky.
On the stock investment front, with some trading; I end off this year with SGD$15k positive. This time only hitting my 2nd investment target. My cpf is about $9k gains also though I cant draw out. I shall endeavor to continue to aim for $30k annual target for cash portfolio to keep growing my money with money, instead of my labour. There were some mistakes made during buying and selling but overall since I am still positive, its good enough for me.
Health is something we often take for granted. Seeing how illness can strike suddenly makes me more appreciative of good health. I shall have to jump-start the exercise routine again as I've completely stopped for a month since the second bout of flu. Its time to manage my health through actions instead of words.
Family and friends are important and will continue to be very dear in my heart. I shall try not to let them bear the brunt of my anger nor neglect them.
In the area of personal pursuits; I've finally gotten an electric guitar and am starting to learn. Though its just the beginning but its a start. I do really need to practice acoustic more cos I've neglected it alot due to busy schedule and excuse of laziness. Just need to make myself practice as regularly for both. Then next year then I shall continue driving practical and test :(]
In the area of personality and way of thinking, I found that I am still changing. A person cant change overnight unless its a near-death aka life-changing experience. So for normal people, it takes time to change. I've been clearing up and throwing stuff from my room and really took time to sort through all those stuff accumulated as an educator. I threw out alot, gave away alot too. Its like letting go of that part of your life and continuing onto the next chapter. Not that I dont miss parts of it, but the fact that I am a more different person so that was part of my history, not my present nor future. At least that's what struck me when I remember that part of my life. I want to become the type who can live in the present, not the past nor the future. I want to live in the moment so that there are no regrets.
With these thoughts, I believe I have the resolutions for 2011 - I want to continue those that I've started and enjoy the journey, not just be blinded by the destination.
Friday, December 31, 2010
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Behavioural Finance - Money Personalities and Dysfunctions
When I first made my initial foray into investment last year, I've realized through personal experience, there is a lot of psychology at play for investment. I wanted to learn more about this behavorial psychology and took the opportunity to visit the national library to search for books to read. Its about time I got an update in more aspects of finance, cos I would like to admit there are many many things I dont know about.
One thing I realized also is that while we have a personality that is expressed socially. There is also a money personality of sort, as in our beliefs on money and also the way we manage our money. While looking through the books about stocks, I flipped through many books about personal finance, which arent anything new, typical stuff, and came across this book. Its about Financial Dysfunctions. Relevant cos in any behaviour, there's functional and dysfunctional.
The title of the book is " Why Smart People do Stupid Things with Money" by Bert Whitehead. The title looks superficial at first but browsing through it, I found it very different from other typical personal finance books.
Its an interesting and easy book to read. Inside for the first time, I am introduced to the concept of Money Personalities, 7 Common types of Financial Dysfunctions, a thorough explaination about the Financial Life Cycle and Functional Asset Allocation. Its not about numbers but explained with analogies that makes sense and also with parallel references to medicine and doctors. I've recognised some personalities and dysfunctions that I had personally experienced and from people I know. Definitely a good read. Almost finished. I need to look through certain parts again so that it stays inside my brain.
__________________________________
From the various new ideas to me. I wanna highlight this - Saving and Paying off debts at the same time and a similar idea of not paying off mortage extra quickly.
To me, previously for the discussion about credit card debt, I mentioned about paying off more than minimum or it will balloon.
But reading this book, where the author advocates Both Paying off and Saving money at the same time.
If a person with excessive consumer debt only focuses on paying off the debts, he will end up with no savings.
The reason why he ends up in large debts because he is good at paying off the debts.
The reason why the person continues to have 0 savings is because he is not good at savings.
So the permanent change is to start saving while paying off the debt. Aim to save 10% of gross income.
Why not pay off the high credit card? The author observes from his clients (he is a fee-based financial planner of 30 years), those who pay off their debts without saving do become debt free more quickly but as they do not replace their old negative habit with a new positive habit, they will end up in debt again as they feel compelled to reward themselves for paying off. Whereas his clients whom save 10% while continue to pay off their debts, end up more positive because after paying off their debts, they have positive savings (money saved in bank) and not still at a 0 saving.
I think this is a very different approach that is more logical financially than what is being preached as common knowledge.
The other is about not paying off mortgage quicker than scheduled. The new concept for me is 'leveraging' in a positive way. So if there is extra money, instead of paying off the mortgage, invest it. To illustrate:
A - has $500,000
$300,000 paid towards home loan (through extra mortgage repayment)
$100,000 in stocks
$100,000 in liquid assets
versus
B
$150,000 in home loan (no extra mortgage repayment)
$200,000 in stocks
$150,000 in liquid assets
B makes more sense cos the extra money helps to 'diversify' into the other two assets and one is not so exposed in the real estate market.
Makes alot of sense but sometimes due to our money personalities and dysfunctions, we dont make alot of good money decisions. Even make irrational ones.
One thing I realized also is that while we have a personality that is expressed socially. There is also a money personality of sort, as in our beliefs on money and also the way we manage our money. While looking through the books about stocks, I flipped through many books about personal finance, which arent anything new, typical stuff, and came across this book. Its about Financial Dysfunctions. Relevant cos in any behaviour, there's functional and dysfunctional.
The title of the book is " Why Smart People do Stupid Things with Money" by Bert Whitehead. The title looks superficial at first but browsing through it, I found it very different from other typical personal finance books.
Its an interesting and easy book to read. Inside for the first time, I am introduced to the concept of Money Personalities, 7 Common types of Financial Dysfunctions, a thorough explaination about the Financial Life Cycle and Functional Asset Allocation. Its not about numbers but explained with analogies that makes sense and also with parallel references to medicine and doctors. I've recognised some personalities and dysfunctions that I had personally experienced and from people I know. Definitely a good read. Almost finished. I need to look through certain parts again so that it stays inside my brain.
__________________________________
From the various new ideas to me. I wanna highlight this - Saving and Paying off debts at the same time and a similar idea of not paying off mortage extra quickly.
To me, previously for the discussion about credit card debt, I mentioned about paying off more than minimum or it will balloon.
But reading this book, where the author advocates Both Paying off and Saving money at the same time.
If a person with excessive consumer debt only focuses on paying off the debts, he will end up with no savings.
The reason why he ends up in large debts because he is good at paying off the debts.
The reason why the person continues to have 0 savings is because he is not good at savings.
So the permanent change is to start saving while paying off the debt. Aim to save 10% of gross income.
Why not pay off the high credit card? The author observes from his clients (he is a fee-based financial planner of 30 years), those who pay off their debts without saving do become debt free more quickly but as they do not replace their old negative habit with a new positive habit, they will end up in debt again as they feel compelled to reward themselves for paying off. Whereas his clients whom save 10% while continue to pay off their debts, end up more positive because after paying off their debts, they have positive savings (money saved in bank) and not still at a 0 saving.
I think this is a very different approach that is more logical financially than what is being preached as common knowledge.
The other is about not paying off mortgage quicker than scheduled. The new concept for me is 'leveraging' in a positive way. So if there is extra money, instead of paying off the mortgage, invest it. To illustrate:
A - has $500,000
$300,000 paid towards home loan (through extra mortgage repayment)
$100,000 in stocks
$100,000 in liquid assets
versus
B
$150,000 in home loan (no extra mortgage repayment)
$200,000 in stocks
$150,000 in liquid assets
B makes more sense cos the extra money helps to 'diversify' into the other two assets and one is not so exposed in the real estate market.
Makes alot of sense but sometimes due to our money personalities and dysfunctions, we dont make alot of good money decisions. Even make irrational ones.
Monday, December 27, 2010
Herculean Task Day 1
Today I got started on cleaning the room. It's a very tough task, but I had steeled myself to throw out more stuff especially those teaching-related stuff. I threw out immense amount of notes and stuff accumulated. When I first packed it back home, I went through another round and reduced it. I aimed to reduce it even further. I've 3 boxes of stationary which I might bring some to work, some throw, some give away. I got rid of a box of 'toys' from all the accumulated Teacher's Day presents. Sadly I didn't use any and I decided to keep the cards n give the rest to salvation. Left 1 extra box of some TBs and WBs, which I have no use. I don't anticipate using for next year or the year after. I cleared quite a bi of stuff but still not done. Will have to continue tomorrow. Think I still have a few boxes to sort through the contents and decide if still relevant or not.
Followed my dad out as he drove me over with 4 bags full of stuff, old electronic items, unused toys, lots of new files. Think it's better than just chucking. Someone might find I useful. After that just stoned. Read a book that my sister dug out while she also cleaned her room. Both of us still not done. So will continue tomorrow.
I am proud to say finally I can let go of things. I don't have to keep so much of those notes even though I had thrown almost 90% away and kept 10% that I thought was relevant but I realized even that 10% I had hardly use so I threw out even more. Amongst those I threw alot of my so-called teaching materials cos I thought they would be useful n so kept them. But seeing how I hadn't even used them once, I threw quite a bit too. Left some which might show Tab to see if she wants otherwise I would have chucked them mostly with little reluctance.
I've also learnt to let go of those stationary and toys. Will let them go to those who need it more. Even things like plastic shelving organizers which I previously bought and used at work but stayed unused cos I don't need them at home, would go to Salvation.
But that's only the teaching stuff. Still have clothes and outside table. I reckon with this sense of letting things go, alot will go.
I've come to realize every long holiday, I would end up clearing my stuff to throw away stuff. It helps cos sometimes during work, we are too busy and things really pile up. Things like old bills and all those stuff from mail. Changing jobs also leave alot of accumulated stuff. Changing size in clothes, but I did a massive wardrobe clear out just the other time.it's more things from my time as an Educator.
I came upon a couple of old worksheets that I made from scratch before NIE and am impressed with the ideas cos I was so much more a keen Educator then. I don't think I can come up with things like those. That's why I was impressed with my younger self. I also looked through the Teacher day cards received over the years, some I can't remember the faces to the names, some I still can. I was deciding whether to throw too but in the end, I decided to keep. It's a form of encouragement as an Educator to receive cards with grateful messages from students. I shall keep them. The other presents lime soft toys I gave away instead.
Also tidied up some miscellaneous DVDs, and the bottles of new alcohol bought. So I tidied them up by putting into the relevant places. So if I can clear those few more boxes, room will be more room-y. Tomorrow hopefully I can clear up alot more before I have to head out in the afternoon.
Followed my dad out as he drove me over with 4 bags full of stuff, old electronic items, unused toys, lots of new files. Think it's better than just chucking. Someone might find I useful. After that just stoned. Read a book that my sister dug out while she also cleaned her room. Both of us still not done. So will continue tomorrow.
I am proud to say finally I can let go of things. I don't have to keep so much of those notes even though I had thrown almost 90% away and kept 10% that I thought was relevant but I realized even that 10% I had hardly use so I threw out even more. Amongst those I threw alot of my so-called teaching materials cos I thought they would be useful n so kept them. But seeing how I hadn't even used them once, I threw quite a bit too. Left some which might show Tab to see if she wants otherwise I would have chucked them mostly with little reluctance.
I've also learnt to let go of those stationary and toys. Will let them go to those who need it more. Even things like plastic shelving organizers which I previously bought and used at work but stayed unused cos I don't need them at home, would go to Salvation.
But that's only the teaching stuff. Still have clothes and outside table. I reckon with this sense of letting things go, alot will go.
I've come to realize every long holiday, I would end up clearing my stuff to throw away stuff. It helps cos sometimes during work, we are too busy and things really pile up. Things like old bills and all those stuff from mail. Changing jobs also leave alot of accumulated stuff. Changing size in clothes, but I did a massive wardrobe clear out just the other time.it's more things from my time as an Educator.
I came upon a couple of old worksheets that I made from scratch before NIE and am impressed with the ideas cos I was so much more a keen Educator then. I don't think I can come up with things like those. That's why I was impressed with my younger self. I also looked through the Teacher day cards received over the years, some I can't remember the faces to the names, some I still can. I was deciding whether to throw too but in the end, I decided to keep. It's a form of encouragement as an Educator to receive cards with grateful messages from students. I shall keep them. The other presents lime soft toys I gave away instead.
Also tidied up some miscellaneous DVDs, and the bottles of new alcohol bought. So I tidied them up by putting into the relevant places. So if I can clear those few more boxes, room will be more room-y. Tomorrow hopefully I can clear up alot more before I have to head out in the afternoon.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
4th Christmas party
This is where blogging helps keep track of stuff. This is the 4th consecutive year of attending the Christmas party at Tab's place. Now my stomach is really full from all I've eaten. I was recounting and it's massive.
This year I brought 4 bottles of wine plus 2 packs of smoked duck breast as it was very popular last year, that meant 1kg of it. Plus 3 packs of muruku, 6 packs of mini sho yue mee. Didn't feel lime bartanding this year. Indeed turned out the wines are very popular too, all finished. The difference being that the wines are flavored; blueberry, tropical fruit n strawberry and the alcoholic content is only a mere 6%, and it's really like having sparkling juice with a slight small tiny kick unless u down a cup in 1 minute. The turkey meat is soft n goes very nicely with the duck breast, onions and carrots and potatoes. Really stuffed.
When I first arrived, ate the muruku none-stop, then after thawing the duck breast n cutting it, ate lots of it, potatoes n bergedel. Then came the whole cracker with dip with a slice of duck breast. When the main lead turkey came, ate turkey with onions, potatoes n carrots. After that, continued munching here and there, ate the fruit cake - first time eating a Christmas one and also ate with vanilla ice cream. Made rootbeer float too. Needless to say, ate way way too much. We played games on IPhones n Touch and stared intently at the screens.
2 types of muruku, sho yue mee, 2 Indo style chips, ruffles, smoked duck breast, the main lead;turkey, onions, carrots, potatoes, bergerdel, crackers, lots of that dip, fruit cake, vanilla ice cream, 3 flavored wine, rootbeer with ice cream n oolong. 21 items. I am so going on a salad n soup diet for the next few days.
This year I brought 4 bottles of wine plus 2 packs of smoked duck breast as it was very popular last year, that meant 1kg of it. Plus 3 packs of muruku, 6 packs of mini sho yue mee. Didn't feel lime bartanding this year. Indeed turned out the wines are very popular too, all finished. The difference being that the wines are flavored; blueberry, tropical fruit n strawberry and the alcoholic content is only a mere 6%, and it's really like having sparkling juice with a slight small tiny kick unless u down a cup in 1 minute. The turkey meat is soft n goes very nicely with the duck breast, onions and carrots and potatoes. Really stuffed.
When I first arrived, ate the muruku none-stop, then after thawing the duck breast n cutting it, ate lots of it, potatoes n bergedel. Then came the whole cracker with dip with a slice of duck breast. When the main lead turkey came, ate turkey with onions, potatoes n carrots. After that, continued munching here and there, ate the fruit cake - first time eating a Christmas one and also ate with vanilla ice cream. Made rootbeer float too. Needless to say, ate way way too much. We played games on IPhones n Touch and stared intently at the screens.
2 types of muruku, sho yue mee, 2 Indo style chips, ruffles, smoked duck breast, the main lead;turkey, onions, carrots, potatoes, bergerdel, crackers, lots of that dip, fruit cake, vanilla ice cream, 3 flavored wine, rootbeer with ice cream n oolong. 21 items. I am so going on a salad n soup diet for the next few days.
Friday, December 24, 2010
Bored and unhappening Eve
Hmm its almost Christmas, but doing nothing much. Well... I dont celebrate it as I am not of the faith that places importance on the day. I do like the festive feeling. Just that we are not doing much today. My parents are away since Wed. I have become a bit of the house-wife.
Dabao lunch and dinner, sweep floor, wash dishes etc. Today I even washed the clothes and used the dryer. Well look forward to the Christmas party tomorrow. I hadnt been exercising much. Just starting to try to manage the amount eaten. Just watched lots and lots of cable tv.
I did borrow 10 books at a go from the library yesterday. Books on BlackJack, Texas hold up, Go, Investments. Quite a bit of reading to do. I opened the fruity Chardonney bought weeks earlier and its quite nice. But drinking two of it meant I might have exceeded the calories for today... Hmm I should try to sleep earlier, now watching more Naruto online.
Dabao lunch and dinner, sweep floor, wash dishes etc. Today I even washed the clothes and used the dryer. Well look forward to the Christmas party tomorrow. I hadnt been exercising much. Just starting to try to manage the amount eaten. Just watched lots and lots of cable tv.
I did borrow 10 books at a go from the library yesterday. Books on BlackJack, Texas hold up, Go, Investments. Quite a bit of reading to do. I opened the fruity Chardonney bought weeks earlier and its quite nice. But drinking two of it meant I might have exceeded the calories for today... Hmm I should try to sleep earlier, now watching more Naruto online.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Free then Busy
Ever had the feeling that when one suddenly has lots of time on hand, suddenly you dont know what to do?
To be more precise, its you know what you have to do, yet dont want to do them. Yep. Finally my holidays are here. It started yesterday. I reached home near 3pm and did nothing much else besides watching cable tv, catching up on episodes of Bones and Dexter recorded. In fact I didnt go anywhere, but I felt bad enough, I did some weights and crunches sets at home, didnt go to the gym. Watched tv until quite late 1.30am plus then head to bed.
Really slept instantly. Woke up several times but finally got up at 10am to key in a stock trade. Then ate yoghurt for breakfast and more cable tv. Finally when I got hungry enough at 1.30pm, I walked over to eat lunch of zar cai and coffee o. Yep quite uninteresting. I was thinking to myself if there were things I could do. At first, nothing comes to mind. But then I remembered quite a number of errands I have to run, things like banking, paying bills.... then included buying the duck breast for Sat and then remembered about heading to the library to borrow some books about Poker. Thinking further, oh yeah... I have to do a big spring cleaning of my room, for the stuff, I really need to throw out quite a bit to make it a more pleasant place to stay in. Need to tidy up my clothes and other stuff too. Suddenly I have ALOT of things to do.
Things like practice guitar, read through the annual reports of stocks, monitor the investments more closely since I have more time, go out to exercise more regularly. Yep I'll be busy indeed. If I can clean up the room and make it more spacious, as well as, go through the annual reports, plus set up an exercise routine, make time to practice some guitar, I would count that as time well spent this 2 weeks.
To be more precise, its you know what you have to do, yet dont want to do them. Yep. Finally my holidays are here. It started yesterday. I reached home near 3pm and did nothing much else besides watching cable tv, catching up on episodes of Bones and Dexter recorded. In fact I didnt go anywhere, but I felt bad enough, I did some weights and crunches sets at home, didnt go to the gym. Watched tv until quite late 1.30am plus then head to bed.
Really slept instantly. Woke up several times but finally got up at 10am to key in a stock trade. Then ate yoghurt for breakfast and more cable tv. Finally when I got hungry enough at 1.30pm, I walked over to eat lunch of zar cai and coffee o. Yep quite uninteresting. I was thinking to myself if there were things I could do. At first, nothing comes to mind. But then I remembered quite a number of errands I have to run, things like banking, paying bills.... then included buying the duck breast for Sat and then remembered about heading to the library to borrow some books about Poker. Thinking further, oh yeah... I have to do a big spring cleaning of my room, for the stuff, I really need to throw out quite a bit to make it a more pleasant place to stay in. Need to tidy up my clothes and other stuff too. Suddenly I have ALOT of things to do.
Things like practice guitar, read through the annual reports of stocks, monitor the investments more closely since I have more time, go out to exercise more regularly. Yep I'll be busy indeed. If I can clean up the room and make it more spacious, as well as, go through the annual reports, plus set up an exercise routine, make time to practice some guitar, I would count that as time well spent this 2 weeks.
Monday, December 20, 2010
Fri, Sat of Mold-airing
Finally got a chance to 'air' the moldy self by heading out with friends over two days.
On Fri, we met up for dinner. I met Tab first and we settled in this potatoe place for some potatoes and salad. I was ranting about the irritation I encountered with Headless then Tab helped me out by giving me her perspective on it. That helped alot. Then we walked around a bit, looking for suitable Christmas presents for her family. Later we met Quetzal for raman dinner at Nantsutei, got various updates about the wedding and the happenings. We shopped around Parco, they got some christmas presents, and both bought that sky-blue dress from that designer cos it was going for 30% discount. We bought bottles of carbonated sake drinks and headed to the top of the Esplanade. Then Tab taught both of us how to say sentences in UK accent. I practiced the 2-3 lines and would use it on Headless the next time she give me broken vague 1-liner instructions. Quetzal sent us home after.
On Sat, I headed for guitar lesson. It has now been converted to electric guitar since 3 lessons ago. I was informed by the counter that my guitar has arrived. I bought the package from the school because I know nuts about electric guitar. No point rushing in to buy an expensive one and later found out I bought a troublesome model. Also at this point, I am just playing power chords. No point getting a $1k one and just play that.... when I more "zai" (skilled) then I get a better one. Also its much less hassle to buy from the school. Its the exact same model used in our lessons. Except I decided to get a different colour. We used the black one, so I decided to get the blue one, so I wont associate the colours as class guitar and the feeling of 'practising at the school'. Everything else is the same. Its not as rock cos there's no double humbuckle, aka the powerful pickup that makes the guitar more rock. But again for my current skills, its enough. Mine are all single pickup. Slowly picking up terms and knowledge from instructor as we start the lesson. So far so good, keeping fingers crossed.
So after guitar classes, I received my guitar and carried it plus the amplifier, to meet my sister, Geoky at the Guan Ying temple. Its to go and give thanks for the blessings this year, and to ask for continued blessing for the new year ahead. On my way over, it rained heavily. I forgot to bring umbrella and had to buy one from those cheap cheap shops. Got a butt ugly pirated Hello Kitty umbrella. So I used that to walk over to the temple. My sister arrived much earlier and I told her to go ahead to pray first. So I just lit the incense and gave donation plus took a tailsman. Then we headed to eat lunch nearby.She got her keyboard lessons after and left. I headed to Illuma to 'kill time' before the dinner meet-up.
I looked around and needed the atm machine cos I had run very very low on cash after the donation and lunch. Just had a couple of bucks left but the only atm in Illuma had run out of cash... I decided to check out the theatre first to see if there's any suitable timing movie that I could catch, that would end just in time. There was, Rapunzel. There was half an hour more then, so I walked over to Bugis to draw cash and then slowly walked back to Illuma via the linking bridge. There was such a huge throng of people in Bugis Junction. Full of christmas shoppers. Didnt felt like doing much cos I was carrying my bag, guitar bag plus an amplifier in a bag on hand. Walked back to Illuma and still had time to buy tickets, go toilet and settle the ang baos that was to be passed back to Tab from the gate-crashing. I purposely chose a seat at the extreme side, near the wall so that I could lean all my stuff against it. The movie was very good! Humourous and quite fast-paced. Very enjoyable way of spending 1.5hrs at an economical price of $10. Think besides Lan gaming at about $2 an hour, watching a movie seems to be the next most economical way of killing hours at a relatively low price. Walking around shopping and eventually having to sit and drink something would cost so much more.
After the movie, I made my way over the bridge again to the mrt to head to meet up for the dinner. Got a ride from FH. This time sat infront and saw all the buttons for the seat. Looked out straight for the window button in case... but didnt have to use it. I was glad to be able to put down the guitar and amp in the car. Dinner was pretty good, liked the sauce for the crayfish, herbal chicken soup most. But its been quite a long while since I've ate so much spicy stuff. Not that it was too hot for me, but cos there were at least 4 spicy dishes of sea food, a bit too much. As after a while, all the unique spicy dishes blended together, until I cant remember which was most impressionable. Also my stomach was a bit aching after that. Too much spice cos I had drastically cut down the amount of spicy food I ate over the years upon advise from mom that spicy food would aggravate my cough. We headed for dessert after and I had this Sencha tea and taste a bit of the 4 slices of cakes ordered. Got a ride home from FH. Thanks!
Sunday, I opened up the electric guitar package and set it up. Practiced a bit. Then went online to find the tabs for "Sunshine of Your Love", Tab would remember this song cos that was what I learnt so many years ago in yamaha music school before the whole fiasco. Well, its really an easy song at that, though I was playing with a lot of noise, due to less than perfect left-hand and right-hand muting. Well it beats playing Chinese rock songs, the one which is my homework, which I've never hear before... Will have 2 weeks time to figure out the song. Wanted to do "Sweet Child of Mine" introd but doesnt sound like.... better check out whether the tabs I printed was correct. Didnt do much besides, eat, watch Bones and Dexter recorded and then some electric guitar playing. Didnt go exercise AT ALL... again. Guess after 2 days of 'airing' am contented to stay home to mold again... But did feel very tired but didnt sleep extra at all...
So regret it this morning when I woke up. I was thinking... "what day is this?" Oh, its a Monday and I have to work. Then got up and ready. Feeling quite out of it. But okay lah, I try to tell myself its a new week, a new start, the last week of work! Wont let anyone spoil my mood. Had 3 lessons and one was with Headless. But she repeated the same activity as last week, meaning she dont have to give me new instructions on what to do, so I didnt have the chance to use my UK lines. Can leave that for next term. So I am in a pretty decent mood, except for feeling tired. But after 1pm, I literally had nothing much else to do. I was monitoring constantly the stock market to see if the buy and sell orders went through, as usual, in current market, its easier to buy than sell. So buy went through, sell still waiting for prices to rise a bit more to my target. Oh well, this whole week, I will be keying in to sell those. Need that final sale to hit $15k target...
So I spent some short time blogging in the free period that I had. Hid upstairs in the kitchen and stone and What's up, FB, check stocks, surf until my batteries were at 39%. Borrowed a collegue's charger, so now its full. Am continuing this entry cos didnt finish just now. Left 1hr to kill. I dont want to ask to help cos that would involve Headless again. I dont want to spoil my own mood plus she didnt ask for help. So I pretend I dont know what is happening and just mind my own biz. Even though its freaking obvious cos I can see when I look over to my left. But I still wanna pretend to be oblivious. Sometimes its easier for them that we dont ask cos whenever we ask, they cant say no. So they have to run around and try to give us work. In Headless case, I rather not, though I wont mind to help the rest due to the way she operates. I rather make things easier for myself since others dont do that for me.
Last time during such times, I would be trying out new recipes in the kitchen cos with at least 3hrs, can try more complicated reicpes. but cos my collegue is away on medical leave reasons, it doesnt feel right to be using the kitchen without her around. Plus I used up the perishable ingredients already. So leave that for next term to continue those cooking experiments. There was once, when I asked another collegue to lend me an acoustic guitar cos I was bored out of my wits. So he was very nice, opened up the room, tuned an acoustic for me and let me use the studio. That guitar was very easy on the fingers... good guitar unlike my budget one. But I dont want to disturb that collegue again. People not like me this free...
So now I am looking at stocks, what's up-ing and blogging.
On Fri, we met up for dinner. I met Tab first and we settled in this potatoe place for some potatoes and salad. I was ranting about the irritation I encountered with Headless then Tab helped me out by giving me her perspective on it. That helped alot. Then we walked around a bit, looking for suitable Christmas presents for her family. Later we met Quetzal for raman dinner at Nantsutei, got various updates about the wedding and the happenings. We shopped around Parco, they got some christmas presents, and both bought that sky-blue dress from that designer cos it was going for 30% discount. We bought bottles of carbonated sake drinks and headed to the top of the Esplanade. Then Tab taught both of us how to say sentences in UK accent. I practiced the 2-3 lines and would use it on Headless the next time she give me broken vague 1-liner instructions. Quetzal sent us home after.
On Sat, I headed for guitar lesson. It has now been converted to electric guitar since 3 lessons ago. I was informed by the counter that my guitar has arrived. I bought the package from the school because I know nuts about electric guitar. No point rushing in to buy an expensive one and later found out I bought a troublesome model. Also at this point, I am just playing power chords. No point getting a $1k one and just play that.... when I more "zai" (skilled) then I get a better one. Also its much less hassle to buy from the school. Its the exact same model used in our lessons. Except I decided to get a different colour. We used the black one, so I decided to get the blue one, so I wont associate the colours as class guitar and the feeling of 'practising at the school'. Everything else is the same. Its not as rock cos there's no double humbuckle, aka the powerful pickup that makes the guitar more rock. But again for my current skills, its enough. Mine are all single pickup. Slowly picking up terms and knowledge from instructor as we start the lesson. So far so good, keeping fingers crossed.
So after guitar classes, I received my guitar and carried it plus the amplifier, to meet my sister, Geoky at the Guan Ying temple. Its to go and give thanks for the blessings this year, and to ask for continued blessing for the new year ahead. On my way over, it rained heavily. I forgot to bring umbrella and had to buy one from those cheap cheap shops. Got a butt ugly pirated Hello Kitty umbrella. So I used that to walk over to the temple. My sister arrived much earlier and I told her to go ahead to pray first. So I just lit the incense and gave donation plus took a tailsman. Then we headed to eat lunch nearby.She got her keyboard lessons after and left. I headed to Illuma to 'kill time' before the dinner meet-up.
I looked around and needed the atm machine cos I had run very very low on cash after the donation and lunch. Just had a couple of bucks left but the only atm in Illuma had run out of cash... I decided to check out the theatre first to see if there's any suitable timing movie that I could catch, that would end just in time. There was, Rapunzel. There was half an hour more then, so I walked over to Bugis to draw cash and then slowly walked back to Illuma via the linking bridge. There was such a huge throng of people in Bugis Junction. Full of christmas shoppers. Didnt felt like doing much cos I was carrying my bag, guitar bag plus an amplifier in a bag on hand. Walked back to Illuma and still had time to buy tickets, go toilet and settle the ang baos that was to be passed back to Tab from the gate-crashing. I purposely chose a seat at the extreme side, near the wall so that I could lean all my stuff against it. The movie was very good! Humourous and quite fast-paced. Very enjoyable way of spending 1.5hrs at an economical price of $10. Think besides Lan gaming at about $2 an hour, watching a movie seems to be the next most economical way of killing hours at a relatively low price. Walking around shopping and eventually having to sit and drink something would cost so much more.
After the movie, I made my way over the bridge again to the mrt to head to meet up for the dinner. Got a ride from FH. This time sat infront and saw all the buttons for the seat. Looked out straight for the window button in case... but didnt have to use it. I was glad to be able to put down the guitar and amp in the car. Dinner was pretty good, liked the sauce for the crayfish, herbal chicken soup most. But its been quite a long while since I've ate so much spicy stuff. Not that it was too hot for me, but cos there were at least 4 spicy dishes of sea food, a bit too much. As after a while, all the unique spicy dishes blended together, until I cant remember which was most impressionable. Also my stomach was a bit aching after that. Too much spice cos I had drastically cut down the amount of spicy food I ate over the years upon advise from mom that spicy food would aggravate my cough. We headed for dessert after and I had this Sencha tea and taste a bit of the 4 slices of cakes ordered. Got a ride home from FH. Thanks!
Sunday, I opened up the electric guitar package and set it up. Practiced a bit. Then went online to find the tabs for "Sunshine of Your Love", Tab would remember this song cos that was what I learnt so many years ago in yamaha music school before the whole fiasco. Well, its really an easy song at that, though I was playing with a lot of noise, due to less than perfect left-hand and right-hand muting. Well it beats playing Chinese rock songs, the one which is my homework, which I've never hear before... Will have 2 weeks time to figure out the song. Wanted to do "Sweet Child of Mine" introd but doesnt sound like.... better check out whether the tabs I printed was correct. Didnt do much besides, eat, watch Bones and Dexter recorded and then some electric guitar playing. Didnt go exercise AT ALL... again. Guess after 2 days of 'airing' am contented to stay home to mold again... But did feel very tired but didnt sleep extra at all...
So regret it this morning when I woke up. I was thinking... "what day is this?" Oh, its a Monday and I have to work. Then got up and ready. Feeling quite out of it. But okay lah, I try to tell myself its a new week, a new start, the last week of work! Wont let anyone spoil my mood. Had 3 lessons and one was with Headless. But she repeated the same activity as last week, meaning she dont have to give me new instructions on what to do, so I didnt have the chance to use my UK lines. Can leave that for next term. So I am in a pretty decent mood, except for feeling tired. But after 1pm, I literally had nothing much else to do. I was monitoring constantly the stock market to see if the buy and sell orders went through, as usual, in current market, its easier to buy than sell. So buy went through, sell still waiting for prices to rise a bit more to my target. Oh well, this whole week, I will be keying in to sell those. Need that final sale to hit $15k target...
So I spent some short time blogging in the free period that I had. Hid upstairs in the kitchen and stone and What's up, FB, check stocks, surf until my batteries were at 39%. Borrowed a collegue's charger, so now its full. Am continuing this entry cos didnt finish just now. Left 1hr to kill. I dont want to ask to help cos that would involve Headless again. I dont want to spoil my own mood plus she didnt ask for help. So I pretend I dont know what is happening and just mind my own biz. Even though its freaking obvious cos I can see when I look over to my left. But I still wanna pretend to be oblivious. Sometimes its easier for them that we dont ask cos whenever we ask, they cant say no. So they have to run around and try to give us work. In Headless case, I rather not, though I wont mind to help the rest due to the way she operates. I rather make things easier for myself since others dont do that for me.
Last time during such times, I would be trying out new recipes in the kitchen cos with at least 3hrs, can try more complicated reicpes. but cos my collegue is away on medical leave reasons, it doesnt feel right to be using the kitchen without her around. Plus I used up the perishable ingredients already. So leave that for next term to continue those cooking experiments. There was once, when I asked another collegue to lend me an acoustic guitar cos I was bored out of my wits. So he was very nice, opened up the room, tuned an acoustic for me and let me use the studio. That guitar was very easy on the fingers... good guitar unlike my budget one. But I dont want to disturb that collegue again. People not like me this free...
So now I am looking at stocks, what's up-ing and blogging.
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Headless plus Gossip
This past week, I have reached the peak of irriatation with this particular collegue at my workplace. Code name Headless. It has accumulated to a point where I dread going into the class with Headless when the rotation comes about. Alot of things that Headless does and asks me irritates me to no end and sees my anger and irritation flaring up.
The reasons are quite a few: It felt better to talk it through with a friend whom can help me put things into perspective.
1) I am put in constant stress by being told things at the extreme, extreme last minute. How last minute? Its when I am already inside the class, with no idea of what I am supposed to do. Then come up to me and tell me to "do this", at times without even answers provided. So I have to do it plus think of answers on the spot immediately. WTF? Others let me know the lesson flow and even which part I will be doing, at least on my way up with them to the class.
2) I have no idea of the flow of the lesson before hand. So going in, I dont know what my role is, no idea of what is going to be done. How do I help students? Increasingly the entire lesson is conducted in pure Jap. It doenst help 2 folds. Firstly though I can understand some, quite a bit I cant too. Doesnt help that I cant understand much to help them. Secondly, students 'regress' backwards to using Jap instead of Eng, though they are studying Eng and supposedly to use it. I really ask myself why am I even inside?
3) She cant communicate. Either tell me one line using the most grammatically strange and extremely vague sentence, thinking that she is using Perfect english (which irriates me as I have to second, third or fourth guess and have to clarify insessiently) OR telling me a one liner and expects me to know how to do it. Eg "Can you do this part?" Hello, different cultural background and there are many ways of "doing", how much more vague can things be? Couple with the extremest last minute, I am constantly put under tension. Basically 'cleaning backside'.
4) Headless asks me the stupidest and most moronic questions at all sort of stupid timing. Usually my irriation meter flares up. Utterly no brain. Dont ask me stupid questions! Period. Tab thinks that Headless is a very lazy person who wants the easy way out of things. True, I think, looking back.
5) In my rotation with her, I have way better classroom control. She does nought while the class is testing the limits and not settling down. No authority at all despite towering over them both in built and height. When I stand beside, I am dwarfed by her size and height, yet I HAVE to be the one to help settle the class, while she does nothing there. WTF? Absolutely no authority and even her style of teaching puts me to sleep. So I pity certain students when they doze off and when I am walking around, I try to pat them awake gently and tell them to focus gently. I was falling alseep myself despite standing on my two feet and walking around.
6) I genuinely question her ability to be the head. She doenst seem to know what is going on around. Supposed to be the one in charge of unifying the entire English curriculum. Does she bother to find things out? I dont think so much, at least from what I've seen in how she does things in many instances. Cannot make it. Argh, I better go to the temples soon to pray and give thanks and ask for greater blessing and protection next year.
Yep that's my work rant all at a go.
The strategy to deal with her after discussing with Tab was to use my most Perfect UK ascent to tell her I have absolutely no idea what she's saying. Yep I need to brush it up and listen to BBC channel and practice infront of the mirror. Put the responsibility back to her.
________________________________
A secondary post is about gossiping. Guess I am not a good one. Plus certain aspects of it does also irritates me. I can listen and I do listen. But I look for an overall picture. Is it big or small incident? how severe?
But maybe its the way I 'judge' people. I wont let first impression stick. I constantly add and deduct marks based on the actions. Cos actions speak louder than words. Even 1 incident with lots of negatives is not really mean the person is beyond redemption in my eyes. It depends on a whole series of incidents, over quite a bit of time. Just like the Headless above, there were so many numerous incidents; large or small and things done that I formed my impression based on them, and it relates to her work. Not to the person. I dont dislike the person that much. But its the whole style of working. If she can redeem herself through more positive actions, my prespective can change for the better.
Well for others in a relationship, I think I am not qualified to make judgements from the sideline. Really, its between both of them. Irregardless of whatever incidents, its up to the two parties involved to resolve. Unless one comes to you for help. In my case, I told Tab and she gave me advise. Vice-versa.
I dont see the entertainment value of just gossiping. This is partially due to my upbringing. My dad doesnt like gossip. My mom doesnt do as much with me. Things like hearing a rumor about relatives otherwise there's no update is fine. Things like whatever incidents, leave one to make own judgement is fine.
Things like a bit of bad-mouthing, verbal bitching of a person is a bit not my thing. True everyone is entitled to their own judgement and impression of things. I guess when one keep 'bashing' on that one person through the use of 'gossip' is not what I like to do. Cos I might see the incident that was 'so severe' and 'telling', in another light where it might appear 'trival' then have a different perspective of it. That's the part of differences in opinions. Sometimes just lay out the facts and let others make their own impressions.
The reasons are quite a few: It felt better to talk it through with a friend whom can help me put things into perspective.
1) I am put in constant stress by being told things at the extreme, extreme last minute. How last minute? Its when I am already inside the class, with no idea of what I am supposed to do. Then come up to me and tell me to "do this", at times without even answers provided. So I have to do it plus think of answers on the spot immediately. WTF? Others let me know the lesson flow and even which part I will be doing, at least on my way up with them to the class.
2) I have no idea of the flow of the lesson before hand. So going in, I dont know what my role is, no idea of what is going to be done. How do I help students? Increasingly the entire lesson is conducted in pure Jap. It doenst help 2 folds. Firstly though I can understand some, quite a bit I cant too. Doesnt help that I cant understand much to help them. Secondly, students 'regress' backwards to using Jap instead of Eng, though they are studying Eng and supposedly to use it. I really ask myself why am I even inside?
3) She cant communicate. Either tell me one line using the most grammatically strange and extremely vague sentence, thinking that she is using Perfect english (which irriates me as I have to second, third or fourth guess and have to clarify insessiently) OR telling me a one liner and expects me to know how to do it. Eg "Can you do this part?" Hello, different cultural background and there are many ways of "doing", how much more vague can things be? Couple with the extremest last minute, I am constantly put under tension. Basically 'cleaning backside'.
4) Headless asks me the stupidest and most moronic questions at all sort of stupid timing. Usually my irriation meter flares up. Utterly no brain. Dont ask me stupid questions! Period. Tab thinks that Headless is a very lazy person who wants the easy way out of things. True, I think, looking back.
5) In my rotation with her, I have way better classroom control. She does nought while the class is testing the limits and not settling down. No authority at all despite towering over them both in built and height. When I stand beside, I am dwarfed by her size and height, yet I HAVE to be the one to help settle the class, while she does nothing there. WTF? Absolutely no authority and even her style of teaching puts me to sleep. So I pity certain students when they doze off and when I am walking around, I try to pat them awake gently and tell them to focus gently. I was falling alseep myself despite standing on my two feet and walking around.
6) I genuinely question her ability to be the head. She doenst seem to know what is going on around. Supposed to be the one in charge of unifying the entire English curriculum. Does she bother to find things out? I dont think so much, at least from what I've seen in how she does things in many instances. Cannot make it. Argh, I better go to the temples soon to pray and give thanks and ask for greater blessing and protection next year.
Yep that's my work rant all at a go.
The strategy to deal with her after discussing with Tab was to use my most Perfect UK ascent to tell her I have absolutely no idea what she's saying. Yep I need to brush it up and listen to BBC channel and practice infront of the mirror. Put the responsibility back to her.
________________________________
A secondary post is about gossiping. Guess I am not a good one. Plus certain aspects of it does also irritates me. I can listen and I do listen. But I look for an overall picture. Is it big or small incident? how severe?
But maybe its the way I 'judge' people. I wont let first impression stick. I constantly add and deduct marks based on the actions. Cos actions speak louder than words. Even 1 incident with lots of negatives is not really mean the person is beyond redemption in my eyes. It depends on a whole series of incidents, over quite a bit of time. Just like the Headless above, there were so many numerous incidents; large or small and things done that I formed my impression based on them, and it relates to her work. Not to the person. I dont dislike the person that much. But its the whole style of working. If she can redeem herself through more positive actions, my prespective can change for the better.
Well for others in a relationship, I think I am not qualified to make judgements from the sideline. Really, its between both of them. Irregardless of whatever incidents, its up to the two parties involved to resolve. Unless one comes to you for help. In my case, I told Tab and she gave me advise. Vice-versa.
I dont see the entertainment value of just gossiping. This is partially due to my upbringing. My dad doesnt like gossip. My mom doesnt do as much with me. Things like hearing a rumor about relatives otherwise there's no update is fine. Things like whatever incidents, leave one to make own judgement is fine.
Things like a bit of bad-mouthing, verbal bitching of a person is a bit not my thing. True everyone is entitled to their own judgement and impression of things. I guess when one keep 'bashing' on that one person through the use of 'gossip' is not what I like to do. Cos I might see the incident that was 'so severe' and 'telling', in another light where it might appear 'trival' then have a different perspective of it. That's the part of differences in opinions. Sometimes just lay out the facts and let others make their own impressions.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Bored, Lazy and Fat from over-eating
Hmm stopped the gym routine again for two weeks due to being sick for two weeks. Sian.
Then this weekend especially, been feeling the muchies really bad.
Sat after guitar, had initially wanted to go with my sister to the Anime and Comic convention at Suntec. I headed down first cos I needed to do some banking at OCBC which has a branch there. But found out that it cost $15 for admission. Think my sister wont want to pay for that so I cancelled with her.
Overeating started... ate nasi lemak for breakfast earlier and some porridge for lunch, yet ate BK after guitar. I headed to Carrefour after eating at BK, bought 6 bottles of the wine that I tried the other time at Tab's place. It was my medicine for the flu then while preparing the gate-crashing food stuff. It was quite a task bringing them back home via public transport. I carried it in a box provided and brought it home via bus. Also bought 2 packs of sushi and ate those too.
Reached home and I ate some of the christmas log cake I made and opened the Blueberry Merlot. Really felt like a pig. Didnt do much after that, watched cable, watched tv and slept.
Gluttony prevailed today too. I ate the log cake with merlot, then ate porridge. After that at 3pm, I ate a pack of Zar Fan, another log cake with merlot. Felt bad enough that I wanted to head to gym but lazing around, meant I missed the time to go cos the gym closed earlier on weekends... Really feel quite bad that I wanna skip dinner. Think I better go drink more tea and water so that I wont feel hungry...
Guess its back to another week of soup and rice for lunch for me. I'll try to control this over-eating part and try to work in exercise again.
Then this weekend especially, been feeling the muchies really bad.
Sat after guitar, had initially wanted to go with my sister to the Anime and Comic convention at Suntec. I headed down first cos I needed to do some banking at OCBC which has a branch there. But found out that it cost $15 for admission. Think my sister wont want to pay for that so I cancelled with her.
Overeating started... ate nasi lemak for breakfast earlier and some porridge for lunch, yet ate BK after guitar. I headed to Carrefour after eating at BK, bought 6 bottles of the wine that I tried the other time at Tab's place. It was my medicine for the flu then while preparing the gate-crashing food stuff. It was quite a task bringing them back home via public transport. I carried it in a box provided and brought it home via bus. Also bought 2 packs of sushi and ate those too.
Reached home and I ate some of the christmas log cake I made and opened the Blueberry Merlot. Really felt like a pig. Didnt do much after that, watched cable, watched tv and slept.
Gluttony prevailed today too. I ate the log cake with merlot, then ate porridge. After that at 3pm, I ate a pack of Zar Fan, another log cake with merlot. Felt bad enough that I wanted to head to gym but lazing around, meant I missed the time to go cos the gym closed earlier on weekends... Really feel quite bad that I wanna skip dinner. Think I better go drink more tea and water so that I wont feel hungry...
Guess its back to another week of soup and rice for lunch for me. I'll try to control this over-eating part and try to work in exercise again.
Wednesday, December 08, 2010
For the record: Paid for an electric guitar
This flu of mine is still not clearing up. I would feel fine and normal at home esp after a good rest, but as the day progresses on at workplace, feel more and more crappy and sickly. Been like this for several days...
After work, I half dragged myself down town to Scape, to look in closer detail at the electric guitar packs for sale at the Maestro guitar. Wanted to see if the models were any better than the basic pack that my music school is offering... Guess what, I can't tell except for the price. So noted down the models n prices and searched for info online while eating soupy dinner in Cineleisure. Quite alot of negative remarks abt certain models... Plus at my current standard of complete noob, no point getting the best. Later can only use it to play Doh Rei Me only...
After dinner, made my way down and felt kinda shitty. Dunno if I could concentrate or function. At least can comprehend the lesson I've missed last Sat. Also asked for permission to video down the basic exercise using I-phone. Can recalling sound better. After class, I thought they would have stock and I can get straight the pack and then bring it n my sickly ass home by cab, but I have to pre-order and I did. They will contact me tom which colours are available. So I am $195 poorer into the early start of this month.
After work, I half dragged myself down town to Scape, to look in closer detail at the electric guitar packs for sale at the Maestro guitar. Wanted to see if the models were any better than the basic pack that my music school is offering... Guess what, I can't tell except for the price. So noted down the models n prices and searched for info online while eating soupy dinner in Cineleisure. Quite alot of negative remarks abt certain models... Plus at my current standard of complete noob, no point getting the best. Later can only use it to play Doh Rei Me only...
After dinner, made my way down and felt kinda shitty. Dunno if I could concentrate or function. At least can comprehend the lesson I've missed last Sat. Also asked for permission to video down the basic exercise using I-phone. Can recalling sound better. After class, I thought they would have stock and I can get straight the pack and then bring it n my sickly ass home by cab, but I have to pre-order and I did. They will contact me tom which colours are available. So I am $195 poorer into the early start of this month.
Monday, December 06, 2010
Monday day-off
Working on a Sunday is surreal especially when one is sick plus lack of sleep. Well I would say that for a good friend's special day, once in a lifetime, it's worth it but I did have to struggle through parts when the flu flared up.
Some interesting points worth mentioning:
That Blueberry Merlot from NTUC @ $9.80 is very good. 6% alcohol and taste pike sparkling juice but tastier. I bought that as my "cough medicine" after I met Tab in J8 for dinner and after that buying the remaining items needed for the 'Gate-crashing' on Sat. Initially on the bus over, I felt real sickly but after dinner, better. Almost back to normal after drinking most of that blue-berry Merlot while preparing the bitter-gourd, chilli, lemon with Krynnder's help.
I dug out the clothes bought for the session to iron them properly but actually accidentally 'ironed' my thigh when my thigh accidentally came into contact with the hot iron. I have a 3-inch long and 1cm width wound on my upper thigh. Ouchy! It's still there, quite red. Called that "murphy's law" striking again. Ate my last bits of meds and slept abt 1.30am.
Woke up at 6.25am and got ready, including hair and make-up. Dabaoed breakfast n hopped on a cab to fetch Krynnder at 7.30am. Bought coffee at the nearby 7-11 cos both of us very stoned from the nite before plus both of us have to wake early on Sunday, the following day due to work. I have to wake at 7am, she got to reach the airport by seven. Tab's keys ended up in my possession from the day before, so we let ourselves in. We joked what would happen if we had the only keys? Thankfully not. Ate without misadventure. Had to be very careful due to the white clothes.
I turned down twice Tab's suggestion to elope on the eve of her wedding and the wedding day itself when we were ready for the gate-crashing. No am not interested. No point trying.
Despite eating breakfast, we got hungry during the reception duty at the church. Never had a Mac hushbrown been so delicious in my life. Think the amount of events, plus rain made one hungry. There was quite a bit of wise-cracking to kill the time, though the bulk was whether we would be stuck by lightning for joking around in the holy place. But the technicality of being outside the main part meant us being safe. Missed the entire mass but its okay. Didnt want to risk joking inside and really getting struck by lightning.
Bought another bottle of Merlot but it's not the same one from Cold Storage after finally gaining access to the Jie Mei's room. I changed out and headed to look for food. Still hungry after the MOS. Settled for soup spoon and that Wolf Blass Red label Merlot @ 13.5% alcohol. It's heavily discounted, supposed to be $42-45 but reduced to $24.50 and it's a 1-litre bottle. It taste pretty good but I prefer it chilled and icey instead of warm. Went back to the room and then had a quick and thorough bath and got ready for the tea ceremony.
FH's girlfriend watched me go through half the bottle after I ate the soup in Tab's room while waiting for them to get ready for the tea ceremony. We chatted happily about make-up and jiu-liang (alcohol limit) cos she watched me go through 2 glasses very quickly. A nice girl, and she helped greatly during the tea ceremony helping to record who gave ang bao n jewellery. I didnt think I could handle having to take pics, keep the valuables plus record on paper. But the task was completed without much glitch though I was in a happily relaxed mode. World not spinning and can still walk straight, can think but just very relaxed. The big glitch was the safe not working. So after several tries, had to go to put into Jie Mei room safe but got misadventure cos Caro used the safe and neglected to inform us of the code. But managed to find in the end so that part was done. FH's gf also helped alot later during the evening reception duty, as she can ask them in malay for names.
My 'cough mixture' effects wore out by the time the 1st dish was served. Didnt drink much, only drank a beer and 2 chinese tea and an orange juice. The serving not prompt and our glasses were left rather empty for long cos of the immense number of people. Later after everything, transferred the tea ceremony valuables to the safe in the bride's room, only after having to call for valet and then getting technician to replace the battery in the unit. After that was done. Stayed on a bit more to drink another glass of Merlot. I left around 2.40am and reached home and slept near 3.30am.
Woke up at 7am the next day for a full day of work. Really sickly then, flu came back with a vengence. I managed to make it through but waiting for the clock to strike 5pm, I fell asleep on my table for 20mins. Really by then too sick to care about killing time productively.
Some interesting points worth mentioning:
That Blueberry Merlot from NTUC @ $9.80 is very good. 6% alcohol and taste pike sparkling juice but tastier. I bought that as my "cough medicine" after I met Tab in J8 for dinner and after that buying the remaining items needed for the 'Gate-crashing' on Sat. Initially on the bus over, I felt real sickly but after dinner, better. Almost back to normal after drinking most of that blue-berry Merlot while preparing the bitter-gourd, chilli, lemon with Krynnder's help.
I dug out the clothes bought for the session to iron them properly but actually accidentally 'ironed' my thigh when my thigh accidentally came into contact with the hot iron. I have a 3-inch long and 1cm width wound on my upper thigh. Ouchy! It's still there, quite red. Called that "murphy's law" striking again. Ate my last bits of meds and slept abt 1.30am.
Woke up at 6.25am and got ready, including hair and make-up. Dabaoed breakfast n hopped on a cab to fetch Krynnder at 7.30am. Bought coffee at the nearby 7-11 cos both of us very stoned from the nite before plus both of us have to wake early on Sunday, the following day due to work. I have to wake at 7am, she got to reach the airport by seven. Tab's keys ended up in my possession from the day before, so we let ourselves in. We joked what would happen if we had the only keys? Thankfully not. Ate without misadventure. Had to be very careful due to the white clothes.
I turned down twice Tab's suggestion to elope on the eve of her wedding and the wedding day itself when we were ready for the gate-crashing. No am not interested. No point trying.
Despite eating breakfast, we got hungry during the reception duty at the church. Never had a Mac hushbrown been so delicious in my life. Think the amount of events, plus rain made one hungry. There was quite a bit of wise-cracking to kill the time, though the bulk was whether we would be stuck by lightning for joking around in the holy place. But the technicality of being outside the main part meant us being safe. Missed the entire mass but its okay. Didnt want to risk joking inside and really getting struck by lightning.
Bought another bottle of Merlot but it's not the same one from Cold Storage after finally gaining access to the Jie Mei's room. I changed out and headed to look for food. Still hungry after the MOS. Settled for soup spoon and that Wolf Blass Red label Merlot @ 13.5% alcohol. It's heavily discounted, supposed to be $42-45 but reduced to $24.50 and it's a 1-litre bottle. It taste pretty good but I prefer it chilled and icey instead of warm. Went back to the room and then had a quick and thorough bath and got ready for the tea ceremony.
FH's girlfriend watched me go through half the bottle after I ate the soup in Tab's room while waiting for them to get ready for the tea ceremony. We chatted happily about make-up and jiu-liang (alcohol limit) cos she watched me go through 2 glasses very quickly. A nice girl, and she helped greatly during the tea ceremony helping to record who gave ang bao n jewellery. I didnt think I could handle having to take pics, keep the valuables plus record on paper. But the task was completed without much glitch though I was in a happily relaxed mode. World not spinning and can still walk straight, can think but just very relaxed. The big glitch was the safe not working. So after several tries, had to go to put into Jie Mei room safe but got misadventure cos Caro used the safe and neglected to inform us of the code. But managed to find in the end so that part was done. FH's gf also helped alot later during the evening reception duty, as she can ask them in malay for names.
My 'cough mixture' effects wore out by the time the 1st dish was served. Didnt drink much, only drank a beer and 2 chinese tea and an orange juice. The serving not prompt and our glasses were left rather empty for long cos of the immense number of people. Later after everything, transferred the tea ceremony valuables to the safe in the bride's room, only after having to call for valet and then getting technician to replace the battery in the unit. After that was done. Stayed on a bit more to drink another glass of Merlot. I left around 2.40am and reached home and slept near 3.30am.
Woke up at 7am the next day for a full day of work. Really sickly then, flu came back with a vengence. I managed to make it through but waiting for the clock to strike 5pm, I fell asleep on my table for 20mins. Really by then too sick to care about killing time productively.
Sunday, December 05, 2010
Petrified / Zombified / Beyond Care
Here I am at my workstation, in an open-space concept office with absolutely no personal space beyond my table. I am stoned. Is petrified a stronger word? I can barely think in my current state. Just am at the ultimate stage of stone-ness I guess.
My sickness is not as bad as yesterday but I am feeling very very groggy, and just want to drop everything. I am beyond care at the time of writing this. Everything seems sureal too. Its a Sunday. I had to work cos its the open-house day. Guess what lessons are as normal with a bit of timetable changes.
Accordingly, I was meant to only have 1 lesson BUT after "Murphy's Law" has struck time and again, I have to go into another, so becomes 1st and 3rd lessons. Fine. My voice sounds so 'sexy' and 'deep', yet I have to conduct one of the activity. Fine.
BUT there's cca! Fine. I go through the motions of walking around and stuff like usual. Even with cca added, it doesnt take the cake as compared to the fact that though students are dismissed at 3pm, all of us have to stay until 5pm!!!IF I wasnt so petrified by sickness and fatique, I would be upstairs trying recipes. But now I am too cant-be-bothered to do anything else productive or otherwise.
Immediately after work, at 5pm sharp, I am heading straight home. Forget gym and breaking the routine, cant help that I am beyond worldly concerns and am only concerned with getting into bed and sleeping.
______________________________________
For the record, I am amazed I can make it through Fri and Sat in this condition. Of course, it varys, from okay to sickly throughout the day. Battling with sickness, Murphy's law plus very late nights and early morning. I am waving my White flag in surrender. Monday my day-off, I am staying in bed.
My sickness is not as bad as yesterday but I am feeling very very groggy, and just want to drop everything. I am beyond care at the time of writing this. Everything seems sureal too. Its a Sunday. I had to work cos its the open-house day. Guess what lessons are as normal with a bit of timetable changes.
Accordingly, I was meant to only have 1 lesson BUT after "Murphy's Law" has struck time and again, I have to go into another, so becomes 1st and 3rd lessons. Fine. My voice sounds so 'sexy' and 'deep', yet I have to conduct one of the activity. Fine.
BUT there's cca! Fine. I go through the motions of walking around and stuff like usual. Even with cca added, it doesnt take the cake as compared to the fact that though students are dismissed at 3pm, all of us have to stay until 5pm!!!IF I wasnt so petrified by sickness and fatique, I would be upstairs trying recipes. But now I am too cant-be-bothered to do anything else productive or otherwise.
Immediately after work, at 5pm sharp, I am heading straight home. Forget gym and breaking the routine, cant help that I am beyond worldly concerns and am only concerned with getting into bed and sleeping.
______________________________________
For the record, I am amazed I can make it through Fri and Sat in this condition. Of course, it varys, from okay to sickly throughout the day. Battling with sickness, Murphy's law plus very late nights and early morning. I am waving my White flag in surrender. Monday my day-off, I am staying in bed.
Friday, December 03, 2010
Rather tired and sickly
Last week, I think I caught some bugs from a collegue who sat right beside me. She was ahem-ing since last Tue. After a couple of days, by Thur, my throat started feeling a bit sore. By Friday, it had developed into some sort of upper respiratory tract infection. I suspect she didnt go see the docs at all. I was busy last weekend, went for jie-mei meeting and Sunday headed to RWS, so didnt see any doc.
I had thought I was better on Monday but by evening, I had different thoughts. Same collegue was still having coughing and stuff, and I was following suit. I went to see the Docs on Monday evening instead of going to the gym. It was a good decision, and I felt better on Tue and Wed after the antibodies.
But the bug is still not clearing up. Thanks to crazy sunny-rainy weather plus still think same collegue didnt go see a doc. She is still ahem-ing and coughing... Man, I really hate to have somebody sitting beside me. I didnt have a neighbour until she came in. Of sort, I am not working that well with her. Dont get her style and stuff and not that in-tune with her working style.
I still have one more day of medication. Just that still having traces of it... Plus I felt so tired. If not well enough, shall go and see doc again soon. Since its one of the few benefits that I have from work, might as well make use of it to make sure I recover. No thanks to sickly neighbours beside.
Havent gone to gym yet. Tuesday, stayed home, Wed, stayed home, Thur, stayed home and slept way earlier than usual. This Sunday would have to work. Its a usual day but parents are free to enter the class and observe. My sense of taste is partially being affected by the bug, so has been eating soupy and plainer stuff for lunch mainly. Just glad that assignment had been cancelled this week, but I need to be more healthy by next week...
Today I feel the bugs coming back with a vengence. Took the meds in the morning. But this week has been rather taxing on me. On top of that, quite intense cos I have to be an oral examiner of sort yesterday and today. Feel stoned after. After work, heading over to friend's place to help settle tomorrow's stuff. Then tonight will have to iron clothes and get ready all the stuff plus sleep early. Tomorrow have to wake up early too.... Quite tired. Thankfully Monday is off in-lieu of working on Sunday.
I had thought I was better on Monday but by evening, I had different thoughts. Same collegue was still having coughing and stuff, and I was following suit. I went to see the Docs on Monday evening instead of going to the gym. It was a good decision, and I felt better on Tue and Wed after the antibodies.
But the bug is still not clearing up. Thanks to crazy sunny-rainy weather plus still think same collegue didnt go see a doc. She is still ahem-ing and coughing... Man, I really hate to have somebody sitting beside me. I didnt have a neighbour until she came in. Of sort, I am not working that well with her. Dont get her style and stuff and not that in-tune with her working style.
I still have one more day of medication. Just that still having traces of it... Plus I felt so tired. If not well enough, shall go and see doc again soon. Since its one of the few benefits that I have from work, might as well make use of it to make sure I recover. No thanks to sickly neighbours beside.
Havent gone to gym yet. Tuesday, stayed home, Wed, stayed home, Thur, stayed home and slept way earlier than usual. This Sunday would have to work. Its a usual day but parents are free to enter the class and observe. My sense of taste is partially being affected by the bug, so has been eating soupy and plainer stuff for lunch mainly. Just glad that assignment had been cancelled this week, but I need to be more healthy by next week...
Today I feel the bugs coming back with a vengence. Took the meds in the morning. But this week has been rather taxing on me. On top of that, quite intense cos I have to be an oral examiner of sort yesterday and today. Feel stoned after. After work, heading over to friend's place to help settle tomorrow's stuff. Then tonight will have to iron clothes and get ready all the stuff plus sleep early. Tomorrow have to wake up early too.... Quite tired. Thankfully Monday is off in-lieu of working on Sunday.
Friday, November 26, 2010
Whoopie Pies 2nd try
Having exams this two days; Thur and Fri.
Yesterday I didnt had to do much beside helping to fold the exam papers cos they are printed on A3 paper. So need to fold into halves and then put the relevant pages together. Luckily I decided to make it yesterday. And finished it yesterday.
I wanted to make a bigger batch, 3 to be precise. So I wasnt going to make 1 batch at a time. I tripled the ingredients and made a huge batch at a go. Wow it was an eye-opener with regards to how sticky the mixture became after all are combined. It became thicker than what I made the 1st try. So I followed the steps that I took when I made it successfully the first time. Familarity with experience, I mass-cut the baking paper, lined the baking tins and then proceeded to scoop out a tablespoonful of the mixture on the baking sheet. But an unexpected outcome came about when I took out the baked whoopie from the oven.
It was humongous. Plus it didnt turn out very roundish. Cos the mixture was very viscous. It wasnt easy to scoop out a tablespoon and when it was on the baking sheet. It didnt spread out much. So that accounted for the thick and odd-shaped whoopies. On the first try, cos the mixture was a little bit less viscous, so during baking, it spreaded outwards and I ended up with very nice rounds. But this batch, taste better, cos I up-ed the sugar. Also with such a huge batch with triple ingredients, it taste richer than before. So now I know about the effects of making seperate batch or a massive batch.
Then an accident of sort happened. My butter which I placed on the workstation was too near to the oven. The heat radiated melted the butter. Shit! Luckily my collegue can drive and we drove out during lunch and got 2 bars of butter. Extra cost dammit! Then I proceeded to make the Peanut-butter Buttercream. To the mixture which taste inbetween smooth peanut and butter, I added grounded peanut powder. And the taste improved by leaps. Then I made Matcha Buttercream. This time I added quite a bit of the matcha powder including a pack of my instant matcha milk. It turned out pretty matcha-ey indeed. Just before dismissal, I just finished up to this stage.
After dismissal, I went back upstairs to continue. I painstakingly spread the buttercream onto the whoopie pies and they resemble hamburgers. Then to make sure I used up all the buttercream, I spread them and then had re-open them to add even more. After that, I had to individually wrap up each of them in plastic. Then I put them in a bigger zip lock bag and put them all in the freezer. So only when want to eat, then take out and let it thaw. I did eat one of each. I was surprised that the whoopie is very thick. And the peanut butter can cover the taste of the cocoa whoopie. But towards the end of the whoopie, I can taste it again. The matcha ones, the matcha complements the cocoa whoopies very well. So I would advise eating the matcha ones first then eating the peanut ones.
Luckily finished making everything yesterday. Cos today, they asked us to help them do marking. It meant our planned extended long long lunch went down the drain. Cos I've finished making so that meant I dont have to stay back late today to make. Just bring home and store in freezer. I think I still have 34 humongous whoopies. Will bring some back home for family, some for tomorrow. And the remainder, I think I would cut into quarters (due to the size) and leave for collegues to finish for me. Too much of it, also cant finish also no point.
Yesterday I didnt had to do much beside helping to fold the exam papers cos they are printed on A3 paper. So need to fold into halves and then put the relevant pages together. Luckily I decided to make it yesterday. And finished it yesterday.
I wanted to make a bigger batch, 3 to be precise. So I wasnt going to make 1 batch at a time. I tripled the ingredients and made a huge batch at a go. Wow it was an eye-opener with regards to how sticky the mixture became after all are combined. It became thicker than what I made the 1st try. So I followed the steps that I took when I made it successfully the first time. Familarity with experience, I mass-cut the baking paper, lined the baking tins and then proceeded to scoop out a tablespoonful of the mixture on the baking sheet. But an unexpected outcome came about when I took out the baked whoopie from the oven.
It was humongous. Plus it didnt turn out very roundish. Cos the mixture was very viscous. It wasnt easy to scoop out a tablespoon and when it was on the baking sheet. It didnt spread out much. So that accounted for the thick and odd-shaped whoopies. On the first try, cos the mixture was a little bit less viscous, so during baking, it spreaded outwards and I ended up with very nice rounds. But this batch, taste better, cos I up-ed the sugar. Also with such a huge batch with triple ingredients, it taste richer than before. So now I know about the effects of making seperate batch or a massive batch.
Then an accident of sort happened. My butter which I placed on the workstation was too near to the oven. The heat radiated melted the butter. Shit! Luckily my collegue can drive and we drove out during lunch and got 2 bars of butter. Extra cost dammit! Then I proceeded to make the Peanut-butter Buttercream. To the mixture which taste inbetween smooth peanut and butter, I added grounded peanut powder. And the taste improved by leaps. Then I made Matcha Buttercream. This time I added quite a bit of the matcha powder including a pack of my instant matcha milk. It turned out pretty matcha-ey indeed. Just before dismissal, I just finished up to this stage.
After dismissal, I went back upstairs to continue. I painstakingly spread the buttercream onto the whoopie pies and they resemble hamburgers. Then to make sure I used up all the buttercream, I spread them and then had re-open them to add even more. After that, I had to individually wrap up each of them in plastic. Then I put them in a bigger zip lock bag and put them all in the freezer. So only when want to eat, then take out and let it thaw. I did eat one of each. I was surprised that the whoopie is very thick. And the peanut butter can cover the taste of the cocoa whoopie. But towards the end of the whoopie, I can taste it again. The matcha ones, the matcha complements the cocoa whoopies very well. So I would advise eating the matcha ones first then eating the peanut ones.
Luckily finished making everything yesterday. Cos today, they asked us to help them do marking. It meant our planned extended long long lunch went down the drain. Cos I've finished making so that meant I dont have to stay back late today to make. Just bring home and store in freezer. I think I still have 34 humongous whoopies. Will bring some back home for family, some for tomorrow. And the remainder, I think I would cut into quarters (due to the size) and leave for collegues to finish for me. Too much of it, also cant finish also no point.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Just got my new I-phone 4 and the whole lot of troubles
My sister handed me my brand new I-phone 4 near midnight, after she came home. I had just only finished bathing and brushing teeth. Just logging onto internet to check on stocks and stuff.
THEN I got to start updating the phone. First disaster, I drop the bloody small SIM card and had to dig around my table area searching frantically for it. At the same time, my dad's irritating questions that always almost seem to pop out at the most unopportune timing. He asked me about stock prices while I was trying to find the SIM card. Obviously I told him I got something else more important to do. My sister logged on and checked the prices for him instead. Geez.
Finally my sister spotted the SIM on my chair instead of the floor. No wonder cant find. Then I had to down-load I-tunes. Obviously I have not been updating it. Plus I was using my sister's laptop. Installed I-tunes and used hers to rip some CDs into my I-Touch. Obviously I cant do it on mine cos the CD-drive was busted.
Then I switched on my sister's super slow laptop to try to install the new version of I-Tunes. And after more than 1/2hr of failed installation attempts then I realized why exactly I couldnt do so. Cos she set up 2 logins and I didnt have adminstrator rights... wanted to ask her but she feel asleep.
K du lan already. I go my laptop and download the I-Tunes which didnt take long. The installation did. The syncing did. Cos obviously my files are all in my sister's laptop. So if I just sync, would lose my data. So doing dunno what sorta of syncing now and its taking bloody long. Plus I need to update the new operating software. And this is just only for I-Touch. What about the I-Phone? Obviously cant do much now with it except to wait and see how the stupid syncing procedure turned out....
So sleepy. Now alread 1.24am. Had a full day. Had assignment....
THEN I got to start updating the phone. First disaster, I drop the bloody small SIM card and had to dig around my table area searching frantically for it. At the same time, my dad's irritating questions that always almost seem to pop out at the most unopportune timing. He asked me about stock prices while I was trying to find the SIM card. Obviously I told him I got something else more important to do. My sister logged on and checked the prices for him instead. Geez.
Finally my sister spotted the SIM on my chair instead of the floor. No wonder cant find. Then I had to down-load I-tunes. Obviously I have not been updating it. Plus I was using my sister's laptop. Installed I-tunes and used hers to rip some CDs into my I-Touch. Obviously I cant do it on mine cos the CD-drive was busted.
Then I switched on my sister's super slow laptop to try to install the new version of I-Tunes. And after more than 1/2hr of failed installation attempts then I realized why exactly I couldnt do so. Cos she set up 2 logins and I didnt have adminstrator rights... wanted to ask her but she feel asleep.
K du lan already. I go my laptop and download the I-Tunes which didnt take long. The installation did. The syncing did. Cos obviously my files are all in my sister's laptop. So if I just sync, would lose my data. So doing dunno what sorta of syncing now and its taking bloody long. Plus I need to update the new operating software. And this is just only for I-Touch. What about the I-Phone? Obviously cant do much now with it except to wait and see how the stupid syncing procedure turned out....
So sleepy. Now alread 1.24am. Had a full day. Had assignment....
Sunday, November 21, 2010
A sense of aimlessness
Dunno why this feeling of 'aimlessness' is coming back. Its like are there better things to be doing with my time. Especially the weekends. Stay home, watch videos and sleep are not that productive....
This could partly be the stopping of the exercise routine, hence more 'time' on hand plus I was sick for about 2 weeks and assignment stopped for almost a month. So with the extra time on hand, without much to do, I do question 'where' exactly am I heading towards? What am I building for myself?
I have resumed the Gym routine this week. So far, I've clocked in twice. Today later in the late afternoon, I shall aim for the 3rd which is pure cardio. Hope to keep to it consistently. Its really tough to start again once one stops.
Could also be the fact that almost hitting the big 3 soon plus see friends getting married. I am heading nowhere in that aspect. Not that marriage would be the instant step to happiness but its a progression somehow 'more forward'. I am stuck in this stage for now. Guess its the concept of a soul-mate that is appealing but going nowhere there.
But I guess mostly it comes about from the ageing. As one gets older, wish to 'move forward in life'. Somehow. The prospect of a lonely life gets more and more of a certainity. Yet one can never not be lonely. Even when surrounded by family and friends, the feeling of loneliness doesnt completely leave. The simple fact is that no one else can exactly understand completely what are the thoughts and worries in our head. Unless we voice it out, even so, not everyone can completely comprehend it to your perspective.
Also when one gets older, then start wondering, what achievements are there that I've achieved. Looking back, there are definitely triumphs and loss yet none are outstanding enough to reckon recognition. Definitely not in the millionaire grade nor the wealthy, nor achieve fame. But is that what I want? Definitely much more money is something but that doesnt explain everything...
Then one realises that's what LIFE is about.
Hmm this could just mean that I've once again been covered by the 'dust from daily life' that I hadnt had the time enough to brush off. Think the coming holiday in late Dec, I shall take a short time-out to rejuvenate.
This could partly be the stopping of the exercise routine, hence more 'time' on hand plus I was sick for about 2 weeks and assignment stopped for almost a month. So with the extra time on hand, without much to do, I do question 'where' exactly am I heading towards? What am I building for myself?
I have resumed the Gym routine this week. So far, I've clocked in twice. Today later in the late afternoon, I shall aim for the 3rd which is pure cardio. Hope to keep to it consistently. Its really tough to start again once one stops.
Could also be the fact that almost hitting the big 3 soon plus see friends getting married. I am heading nowhere in that aspect. Not that marriage would be the instant step to happiness but its a progression somehow 'more forward'. I am stuck in this stage for now. Guess its the concept of a soul-mate that is appealing but going nowhere there.
But I guess mostly it comes about from the ageing. As one gets older, wish to 'move forward in life'. Somehow. The prospect of a lonely life gets more and more of a certainity. Yet one can never not be lonely. Even when surrounded by family and friends, the feeling of loneliness doesnt completely leave. The simple fact is that no one else can exactly understand completely what are the thoughts and worries in our head. Unless we voice it out, even so, not everyone can completely comprehend it to your perspective.
Also when one gets older, then start wondering, what achievements are there that I've achieved. Looking back, there are definitely triumphs and loss yet none are outstanding enough to reckon recognition. Definitely not in the millionaire grade nor the wealthy, nor achieve fame. But is that what I want? Definitely much more money is something but that doesnt explain everything...
Then one realises that's what LIFE is about.
Hmm this could just mean that I've once again been covered by the 'dust from daily life' that I hadnt had the time enough to brush off. Think the coming holiday in late Dec, I shall take a short time-out to rejuvenate.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Whoopie cake 1st try
A whoopie cake is like a cake-version of the macarons. Imagine two 3-4cm diameter cake shells that sandwiches the cream filling. I had a rather successful run making it on Friday. The only hic-cup is the Matcha buttercream (round 3) which didnt turn out fluffy enough...
I put them together and cut into halves and left on the table for collegues shortly before I left. I did taste one. I think its pretty good except it wasnt that sweet. So I could consider tweaking the recipe to make it sweeter, either the cake shells or the filling. Both werent that sweet which is actually fine with me.
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Still havent gone about gym yet. I think I shall make a last ditch try today - Sunday. I am a bit tempted to go down for the Anime thingy cos yesterday we didnt go. See how...
One more week of lax before I resume the assignment, which is twice-weekly. Its very hard to start once one stops the routine. Lost the momentum. Hard to regain. Both mind and body are weak.
I went out alone on Friday. After the whoopie cake making, I left at 5pm and went home to change first. Didnt know what to do so I took but 143 all the way to Orchard. Cos I didnt want to squeeze with rush hour crowd on the mrt. Reached Orchard and I walked towards Scape. Used toilet and walk over to Cathay. Was thinking of catching a movie if the timing allows. Ate Mee Hoon Kueh plus very delicious Guo Tie from the basement food court. Was too full to consider BFF - best fries forever. Feeling full and warm after the soupy dinner, I walked over to Paragon to get some drinks. In the end, felt tired and not up for a movie. In the Jasons Marketplace, it was very very Christmasy. Lots of Christmas goodies and chocs and drinks. Its where one really realize that Christmas is coming and the mood is there. After that, I took a bus home again.
Yesterday was a nice trip out. Just that I felt tired at certain points. Think the lack of exercise is affecting my stamina. More a reason to start. The new place we tried out "Strictly Pancakes" serves very good pancakes. Also I bought about 4 Cds. I did change SGD at a pretty high rate of RM$2.385 and thus fatten my malaysian wallet further. Also guitar lesson was better, at least I could understand some stuff. We'll be switching to electric guitar at the end of this set of 4 lessons.
Dinner though was kinda disappointing cos the food was really just like 'canned' or 'ready-made' style. Nothing memorable and it was mediocre. Plus it was pricey. My set dinner cost $11.90 for a drink, a stew (with rice and fries) and I added on a medium fries also. So the stew reminds me of canned soup and I think they put in 'leftover' or 'extra' ingredients that come from their other mains like hotdogs and chicken chop. The rice was pretty good, which is some rice with mushroom and cooked with a sauce. The fries were normal. I ordered the funky and healthy "beetroot with honey" and its not bad. But I would not consider eating there again. Not a good value proposition. Felt tired after that, think lack of stamina. We walked around a bit more before I left to take a bus. I actually dozed and slept on the bus journey. Woke a few times to check that I didnt miss the stop. Reached home around 10.20pm. Took a bath, brushed teeth and slept.
Again I woke up at the ungodly time of 7.30am without alarm clocks at all. Its irritating cos I really wanna sleep more on weekends but my body clock is really tuned to my working hours. Now I am hungry, havent eaten breakfast yet. Think I shall go over to eat something.
I put them together and cut into halves and left on the table for collegues shortly before I left. I did taste one. I think its pretty good except it wasnt that sweet. So I could consider tweaking the recipe to make it sweeter, either the cake shells or the filling. Both werent that sweet which is actually fine with me.
___________________________________
Still havent gone about gym yet. I think I shall make a last ditch try today - Sunday. I am a bit tempted to go down for the Anime thingy cos yesterday we didnt go. See how...
One more week of lax before I resume the assignment, which is twice-weekly. Its very hard to start once one stops the routine. Lost the momentum. Hard to regain. Both mind and body are weak.
I went out alone on Friday. After the whoopie cake making, I left at 5pm and went home to change first. Didnt know what to do so I took but 143 all the way to Orchard. Cos I didnt want to squeeze with rush hour crowd on the mrt. Reached Orchard and I walked towards Scape. Used toilet and walk over to Cathay. Was thinking of catching a movie if the timing allows. Ate Mee Hoon Kueh plus very delicious Guo Tie from the basement food court. Was too full to consider BFF - best fries forever. Feeling full and warm after the soupy dinner, I walked over to Paragon to get some drinks. In the end, felt tired and not up for a movie. In the Jasons Marketplace, it was very very Christmasy. Lots of Christmas goodies and chocs and drinks. Its where one really realize that Christmas is coming and the mood is there. After that, I took a bus home again.
Yesterday was a nice trip out. Just that I felt tired at certain points. Think the lack of exercise is affecting my stamina. More a reason to start. The new place we tried out "Strictly Pancakes" serves very good pancakes. Also I bought about 4 Cds. I did change SGD at a pretty high rate of RM$2.385 and thus fatten my malaysian wallet further. Also guitar lesson was better, at least I could understand some stuff. We'll be switching to electric guitar at the end of this set of 4 lessons.
Dinner though was kinda disappointing cos the food was really just like 'canned' or 'ready-made' style. Nothing memorable and it was mediocre. Plus it was pricey. My set dinner cost $11.90 for a drink, a stew (with rice and fries) and I added on a medium fries also. So the stew reminds me of canned soup and I think they put in 'leftover' or 'extra' ingredients that come from their other mains like hotdogs and chicken chop. The rice was pretty good, which is some rice with mushroom and cooked with a sauce. The fries were normal. I ordered the funky and healthy "beetroot with honey" and its not bad. But I would not consider eating there again. Not a good value proposition. Felt tired after that, think lack of stamina. We walked around a bit more before I left to take a bus. I actually dozed and slept on the bus journey. Woke a few times to check that I didnt miss the stop. Reached home around 10.20pm. Took a bath, brushed teeth and slept.
Again I woke up at the ungodly time of 7.30am without alarm clocks at all. Its irritating cos I really wanna sleep more on weekends but my body clock is really tuned to my working hours. Now I am hungry, havent eaten breakfast yet. Think I shall go over to eat something.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Pan cakes _ Vanilla Ice Cream
After a long stand-still... today I got about to making some pan-cakes during my free period. Since I've finished my solo lessons for today, I had a free period and I decided to cook instead. I dont really know HOW a nice pancake taste like or look like, so its a hard to decide how long to cook it. So though they didnt turn out fluffy or thick, they are chewy. Still have some leftover flour, think I will try to make some with less milk so its less liquid. But its not rising much... hmm have to research more about 'making pancake mix from scratch'.
Which brings me to the newly opened shop near my guitar school, called "Simply Pancakes". Think I need to visit it to check out what and how a good pancake should look and taste like. There's an anime convenction of sort this weekend. Dont think I will go for the concert... see how after guitar this sat. Still need lunch after that.
Then since after meeting still got some time, I spent it cleaning up and cutting up the "chocolate chip pancakes" and serving it downstairs for collegues. Then while watching my collegue, cos now I am free-er after work cos of not starting assignment yet also have been skipping gym...
... so I asked if she would be taking some more time, so I can go and try out the 'Amateurish Ice-cream'. The last 2 weeks, I have been freezing many ice-cubes at work so used them and did a 'Vanilla Ice Cream' but cos didnt really massage it for too long plus maybe too little salt used... so its still more liquidy. So I poured the fluffy melted-ice-cream style liquid into a container and seal and put in the freezer. See how it turns out at tomorrow.
Nothing much else... I am trying to 'jump-start' the gym going and more stuff which I dropped after being sickly for 2 weeks. So hard to get started...
Still have several new recipes to try out. Also still have to do re-match with macarons... also thinking of pairing macarons with tiramisu cos one uses alot of egg white, the other uses only egg yolks.
Which brings me to the newly opened shop near my guitar school, called "Simply Pancakes". Think I need to visit it to check out what and how a good pancake should look and taste like. There's an anime convenction of sort this weekend. Dont think I will go for the concert... see how after guitar this sat. Still need lunch after that.
Then since after meeting still got some time, I spent it cleaning up and cutting up the "chocolate chip pancakes" and serving it downstairs for collegues. Then while watching my collegue, cos now I am free-er after work cos of not starting assignment yet also have been skipping gym...
... so I asked if she would be taking some more time, so I can go and try out the 'Amateurish Ice-cream'. The last 2 weeks, I have been freezing many ice-cubes at work so used them and did a 'Vanilla Ice Cream' but cos didnt really massage it for too long plus maybe too little salt used... so its still more liquidy. So I poured the fluffy melted-ice-cream style liquid into a container and seal and put in the freezer. See how it turns out at tomorrow.
Nothing much else... I am trying to 'jump-start' the gym going and more stuff which I dropped after being sickly for 2 weeks. So hard to get started...
Still have several new recipes to try out. Also still have to do re-match with macarons... also thinking of pairing macarons with tiramisu cos one uses alot of egg white, the other uses only egg yolks.
Saturday, November 06, 2010
Suddenly dunno what to do with myself
Its just 2 weeks of having more free time cos assignments ended for now. I actually said "No" to money. My ex-collegue sms me just one week after the assignment ended to ask if tuition would resume. I sms her back that I intend to take a break and also I was still sick then. Yes, so I do say "No' to money coming my way. Think I needed the break plus too sick to consider others.
So thanks to being sickly for 2 weeks, I have stopped going to gym. No assignments. So that meant I spent numerous hours at home. Quite a lot in bed sleeping. But still not very productive. Maybe due to this, I am started to feel quite bored and at a loss of what to do with the time I have on hand. Cant seem to find anything else much to do at home that would alleviate the feeling. Maybe its due to almost 3 weeks of just work-home and not much heading out. On the other hand, I must say I would have saved quite a bit of money by leading this type of low-expense life for almost a month.
Ironically I didnt lose weight due to illness. Did affect my appetite a bit but when at home, just eat and sleep. So no loss... Due to being unwell for two weeks, didnt try any cooking experiment at work place. Ya think many things came to a stand-still.
Hmm the stock market seems to be heading up. I am waiting in particular for one counter which hasnt moved up to do so, so that I can do my trading and sell for profits. The other stocks that have gained, I dont have so many lots in the first place, so those have to wait and see if they go higher. Only 2 months left until book-closing. Still havent hit the $15k target... Hmm but I dont want to just sell now to realize immediate profit cos the potential for more may lie a few months down the road. Oh well, if by Dec, at most leave that for next year's profits then. Its just a sort of accounting. Not really set in stone.
So thanks to being sickly for 2 weeks, I have stopped going to gym. No assignments. So that meant I spent numerous hours at home. Quite a lot in bed sleeping. But still not very productive. Maybe due to this, I am started to feel quite bored and at a loss of what to do with the time I have on hand. Cant seem to find anything else much to do at home that would alleviate the feeling. Maybe its due to almost 3 weeks of just work-home and not much heading out. On the other hand, I must say I would have saved quite a bit of money by leading this type of low-expense life for almost a month.
Ironically I didnt lose weight due to illness. Did affect my appetite a bit but when at home, just eat and sleep. So no loss... Due to being unwell for two weeks, didnt try any cooking experiment at work place. Ya think many things came to a stand-still.
Hmm the stock market seems to be heading up. I am waiting in particular for one counter which hasnt moved up to do so, so that I can do my trading and sell for profits. The other stocks that have gained, I dont have so many lots in the first place, so those have to wait and see if they go higher. Only 2 months left until book-closing. Still havent hit the $15k target... Hmm but I dont want to just sell now to realize immediate profit cos the potential for more may lie a few months down the road. Oh well, if by Dec, at most leave that for next year's profits then. Its just a sort of accounting. Not really set in stone.
Thursday, November 04, 2010
Pale and sickly
Hmm this week I have been quite stoned and sedated at work. Rather unproductive. After catching something last Monday or so and then seeing the doc on Thur. I have spent many hours lying in bed, hoping to recover quickly. It didnt help that last week, my temper wasnt that good cos of sickness. But after the whole stay-in weekend, still wasnt well on Monday.
Kept having relapse daily of headache and cough and feeling very sickly. I would lie in bed sweating like crazy but still suffer daily relapses. I start off the day feeling normal but by early afternoon, start getting the symptoms again. I tried to sleep it off, really sweated buckets but still not completely well.
Tuesday I asked for permission to leave earlier just before cca cos dont feel good. Went to see a doc in the evening. Got mc that I used on Wed. Its my first mc since I've started. I spent majority of Wed sleeping in bed, sweating buckets again. Only in the later evening, I had to make my way for guitar make-up cos this sat session, the instructor cant make it. I was quite stoned then and again not getting some stuff left me quite frustrated. I guess bo bian since I didnt practice much since I was lying sickly in bed most of the other days this week. Reached home and just slept and slept.
Today is much better. So far no relapse but just feeling weak in general. Collegues said I look sickly n pale.with blue lips. I looked at myself in the mirror after that. True enough, I looked quite pale. So far I just finished the day with cca. Even made myself do some strokes with a couple of students. Man that's tiring. But at least so far no relapse.
Hope to recover enough to resume gym going. Completely came to a stop since last Monday. Dont believe in pushing myself especially when genuinely unwell. Hope to be able to go out also. Quite a few weekend of staying home. Quite boring and unproductive. Also better be well enough to practice guitar more dilligently... really hate to be frustrated.
Kept having relapse daily of headache and cough and feeling very sickly. I would lie in bed sweating like crazy but still suffer daily relapses. I start off the day feeling normal but by early afternoon, start getting the symptoms again. I tried to sleep it off, really sweated buckets but still not completely well.
Tuesday I asked for permission to leave earlier just before cca cos dont feel good. Went to see a doc in the evening. Got mc that I used on Wed. Its my first mc since I've started. I spent majority of Wed sleeping in bed, sweating buckets again. Only in the later evening, I had to make my way for guitar make-up cos this sat session, the instructor cant make it. I was quite stoned then and again not getting some stuff left me quite frustrated. I guess bo bian since I didnt practice much since I was lying sickly in bed most of the other days this week. Reached home and just slept and slept.
Today is much better. So far no relapse but just feeling weak in general. Collegues said I look sickly n pale.with blue lips. I looked at myself in the mirror after that. True enough, I looked quite pale. So far I just finished the day with cca. Even made myself do some strokes with a couple of students. Man that's tiring. But at least so far no relapse.
Hope to recover enough to resume gym going. Completely came to a stop since last Monday. Dont believe in pushing myself especially when genuinely unwell. Hope to be able to go out also. Quite a few weekend of staying home. Quite boring and unproductive. Also better be well enough to practice guitar more dilligently... really hate to be frustrated.
Monday, November 01, 2010
Still sickly???
On Sat, after guitar, my flu flared up. The weather was wet and cold, so I ate a soupy lunch. Managed to walk over to the Cathay before I gave up and headed home. Was still well enough to reach home before it flared up.
I spent the entire Sat lying in bed, sweating non-stop and dozing off and waking. But still not concuss type. Sun was better already. I deferred gym and just stayed at home. Was feeling pretty good until near dinner. Somehow got a bit nausea so ate just a light dinner.
This morning, I was back to normal but until 2 plus, started to stone again. I could feel that it's not fatique but like another flu relapse type of grogginess. Reached home and stayed home. By 7pm, am back to having slight headache forming. Cough with lots of phelghm while bathing. Felt better after coughing and spitting them away. Ate my meds and am trying to let the body rest. If no improvement, am seeing the docs again. Might need stronger anti-biotics. A dull headache is forming at my forehead, the meds managed to dull the ache. Will try to sleep soon.
I spent the entire Sat lying in bed, sweating non-stop and dozing off and waking. But still not concuss type. Sun was better already. I deferred gym and just stayed at home. Was feeling pretty good until near dinner. Somehow got a bit nausea so ate just a light dinner.
This morning, I was back to normal but until 2 plus, started to stone again. I could feel that it's not fatique but like another flu relapse type of grogginess. Reached home and stayed home. By 7pm, am back to having slight headache forming. Cough with lots of phelghm while bathing. Felt better after coughing and spitting them away. Ate my meds and am trying to let the body rest. If no improvement, am seeing the docs again. Might need stronger anti-biotics. A dull headache is forming at my forehead, the meds managed to dull the ache. Will try to sleep soon.
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Sickly week n weekend
Think there's some flu bug going around and I caught it around Monday evening. Maybe it's the haze the week before. But by tuesday evening, was alternating between normal n lousy throughtout the day. But as it was the last session of assignment just before exam, I took a 15min nap and felt better to make my way down.
Wednesday was slightly better, thought I was recovering. Tried to sleep earlier. By Thursday, I felt quite zonked out by late afternoon. Had a headache developing, more zombified. Went to see doc in the evening but declined taking mc.
Friday, I started being quite okay, thanks to medication n rest. But after 4th, where again my temper meter went up cos collegue 'ask me stupid stuff' and can't tell me what she want clearly, felt worn out. Decided not to think or do anything besides finish off what's on hand.
As I had agreed two weeks earlier to attend another level's monthly party. Somrhing like show them face once since they tried to invite me twice already... But that meant $66... I chose to drink cos I know that San Migel draught beer would be free-flow for 2 hrs. Cos if not drinking, got to pay $55 for generally lousy n cheap food. It's like the non-drinkers subsidize the drinkers. So after doing some math, $10 for food. Left $56 which translates to 7 mugs of beer. In general, a mug of draught beer can cost $9-11.
I had to wait around at workplace cos though I knock off at 5pm, it was slated for 7pm. I killed time by hanging around the kitchen, watching n chatting with a collegue while she bakes her cakes. My flu flared up some. I was very stoned. Brain really shut down though I am still functional plysically. Then around 6.45pm, I went down to my work station and found almost everybody gone... I realized they had mostly left together so I walked over there by myself. The pub is very near to Clementi stadium. I could see them walking about 100m ahead of me. So while walking, I kept asking myself WHY the hell I ever opened my mouth to agree. Cos literally feel like shit, plus extended my day of sort, cos this whole week, I tio about 10hrs of computer lab duty which actually eats into my free periods. Also though I could surf the net, just need to keep an eye on that few students, I couldn't do anything too productive. That's why this entire week seem so long. Like never-ending.
Anyway I reached there and sat at an empty seat right smack in the middle of guys. They also seem to follow this 'rigid' way of ladies one side, guys one side. I just sat where it's not too unpleasant for me, cos actually this whole week, the 2 new female collegues have been pushing my "irritation button" by either asking me really stupid stuff or using extremely vague and strange English to sort of 'tell' me what they wNt me to do in their classes when I go into theirs. But dunno why, though they actually stay n work in Eng-speaking countries, when they work here, suddenly their English regresses so much until I can't make out what is it they are trying to tell me in the vague, round-about manner. I literally have to be a psychic to guess out what they want... AND that really irks me. My temper wasn't so good especially when I am unwell already. Then asking or telling such 'stupid' things really drives me nuts. I snap at them the few times they did so. So I decided not to sit near the two ladies to give myself time out n also not to have to spoil anything by snapping when they unknowingly push my "buttton". Think that was the best choice of the day.
Dinner food wasn't fantastic. Fried rice, smoked duck breast like the one I bought from seng siong, potatoe wedges, a tray of assorted fried dumplings, fish cake. IF I had to pay $55 for this, I would be grossly overpaying. Hence that's why I decided to drink. To help with the calories, I had lor mee n coffee in the morning, Plain pork porridge for lunch.
I dug in and for the first time, eat dinner with beer. I don't eat dinner while drinking, maybe for liquor but not for beer. Also usually alcoholic drinks come after dinner. Then had some conversations here n there. Mostly collegues ask about why I become teacher, quit teaching, ask about family. Cos these are not so personal topics, so I just tell them frankly. Though I did ask them about similar stuff.
When they wanted to refill my partially drunk beer, I told them I would after I've drunk more cos I wanna keep count, to know and test my limit. The Aussie collegues were quite chatty and funny at times. But I've realized, for all thr insistence on getting free flow of beer, they don't really drink that much. As in, they don't hi the value they are paying. Plus its obvious they are ripped off cos they don't let us locals or Aussies help negotiate n plan such parties. There are so many fantastic deals a budget of $70 can fetch yet they just settle
for such. Leaves us sighing at times. Think it would be much cheaper just to order ala-carte n happy hour. Still pay much lesser.
After it ended, I've finished 6-7 mugs of draught beer in the 2 hrs of free flow. So got my money's worth. I was tipsy but can still think, walk in straight line, no spinning world. Can feel the alcohol but not as strong as other times when I drank alot of spirits or Martinis. Walked home after and reached home in 10minutes. It was unexpectedly more enjoyable than some ofthe other parties I've been to, think it's cos I've talked more, the beer tastes good too plus I got the value for it - for a change. Whether I would go for another, mostly no unless it's a value proposition.
I reached home and drank 2 cups of water n was too full to drink the soup my mom made. Then I changed and slept. With the amount of alcohol, I had a good night's sleep. Slept through until I woke up naturally at 8.30am!
Was feeling okay, went over to buy breakfast but after that, felt sickly. Like the flu flaring up. Ate meds and rested until guitar. But after guitar, flu flared up again. I thought of killing time by watching a movie. After lunch at PO-MO, I actually walked over to the Cathay. But headache starting up and alternating light-headedness n heavy-headedness. Decided to go home instead.
Reached home, ate meds and lie in bed. My mind is alert and can't fall asleep but kept sweating. My mom said I dragged on too long, didn't let body rest enough. It's a pity I can't head out or stay out longer. Will miss the Halloween signts n dinner but really don't think I would want to wear the same outfit even if I am not sick.
Would just want a simple meal to catch up but not have to 'kill' so many hours waiting for the meal. Maybe cos I want my weekends to last longer, so I prefer to be out more in the rapier afternoon. More hours to do things before dinner.
If I am at home, just meet for dinner, I also find that it shortens time. Cos I can't make any plans inbetween dinner time. Rather meet for lunch or around tea time. Still have time to do other stuff then wait until dinner and after dinner to walk around.
Then if I am already out, it's even worst. Got so many hours to kill. At least 4-5hrs in town, alone. What is there to do, that would interest n occupy me for that long? It's very difficult in my normal physical state. Can't go gym cos no public ones that near. Go home and come out again is a very time-wasting and tiring thing. Spend 1hr to go back then shortly have to travel 1hr out again. I won't make it out of the house, too much effort. Shopping doent occupy nor interest me much. I don't like to browse too long hours at bookshop nor can I read properly in a cafe. I don't see the merits of sitting at a cafe to just play I-touch or people watch for 4hrs. Nor just settling for a movie to while away time. I would rather have the time to either rest, exercise at gym or practice guitar. All which requiresme to be at my area. Though I make the effort to come out. Having to while away several hours alone, doing things that don't really appeal to me, is q waste of time, effort n by the time, I am mentally n physically tired cos doing all those is taxing.
A Sat is a precious day. Make full use of the morning, afternoon and evening hours to do something useful, relaxing n enjoyable. Not wait until evening to start. From 7pm until 10pm, it's just 3 hrs before everywhere is closing. Then really nothing much to do except eating or drinking. A bit more then it's midnight, and it's over. I wanna stretch it out by enjoying the morning with breakfast, free n easy hours until it's time for guitar. Though I sometimeswinder why I put so much effort to go down for it but after it, there's many more hours to do things before evening arrives. On days, I can even go gym by 5pm-6pm and finsih by 7-8pm. Still have a few hours to watch tv, read manga, relax before it's time to sleep. That's an ideal.
Wednesday was slightly better, thought I was recovering. Tried to sleep earlier. By Thursday, I felt quite zonked out by late afternoon. Had a headache developing, more zombified. Went to see doc in the evening but declined taking mc.
Friday, I started being quite okay, thanks to medication n rest. But after 4th, where again my temper meter went up cos collegue 'ask me stupid stuff' and can't tell me what she want clearly, felt worn out. Decided not to think or do anything besides finish off what's on hand.
As I had agreed two weeks earlier to attend another level's monthly party. Somrhing like show them face once since they tried to invite me twice already... But that meant $66... I chose to drink cos I know that San Migel draught beer would be free-flow for 2 hrs. Cos if not drinking, got to pay $55 for generally lousy n cheap food. It's like the non-drinkers subsidize the drinkers. So after doing some math, $10 for food. Left $56 which translates to 7 mugs of beer. In general, a mug of draught beer can cost $9-11.
I had to wait around at workplace cos though I knock off at 5pm, it was slated for 7pm. I killed time by hanging around the kitchen, watching n chatting with a collegue while she bakes her cakes. My flu flared up some. I was very stoned. Brain really shut down though I am still functional plysically. Then around 6.45pm, I went down to my work station and found almost everybody gone... I realized they had mostly left together so I walked over there by myself. The pub is very near to Clementi stadium. I could see them walking about 100m ahead of me. So while walking, I kept asking myself WHY the hell I ever opened my mouth to agree. Cos literally feel like shit, plus extended my day of sort, cos this whole week, I tio about 10hrs of computer lab duty which actually eats into my free periods. Also though I could surf the net, just need to keep an eye on that few students, I couldn't do anything too productive. That's why this entire week seem so long. Like never-ending.
Anyway I reached there and sat at an empty seat right smack in the middle of guys. They also seem to follow this 'rigid' way of ladies one side, guys one side. I just sat where it's not too unpleasant for me, cos actually this whole week, the 2 new female collegues have been pushing my "irritation button" by either asking me really stupid stuff or using extremely vague and strange English to sort of 'tell' me what they wNt me to do in their classes when I go into theirs. But dunno why, though they actually stay n work in Eng-speaking countries, when they work here, suddenly their English regresses so much until I can't make out what is it they are trying to tell me in the vague, round-about manner. I literally have to be a psychic to guess out what they want... AND that really irks me. My temper wasn't so good especially when I am unwell already. Then asking or telling such 'stupid' things really drives me nuts. I snap at them the few times they did so. So I decided not to sit near the two ladies to give myself time out n also not to have to spoil anything by snapping when they unknowingly push my "buttton". Think that was the best choice of the day.
Dinner food wasn't fantastic. Fried rice, smoked duck breast like the one I bought from seng siong, potatoe wedges, a tray of assorted fried dumplings, fish cake. IF I had to pay $55 for this, I would be grossly overpaying. Hence that's why I decided to drink. To help with the calories, I had lor mee n coffee in the morning, Plain pork porridge for lunch.
I dug in and for the first time, eat dinner with beer. I don't eat dinner while drinking, maybe for liquor but not for beer. Also usually alcoholic drinks come after dinner. Then had some conversations here n there. Mostly collegues ask about why I become teacher, quit teaching, ask about family. Cos these are not so personal topics, so I just tell them frankly. Though I did ask them about similar stuff.
When they wanted to refill my partially drunk beer, I told them I would after I've drunk more cos I wanna keep count, to know and test my limit. The Aussie collegues were quite chatty and funny at times. But I've realized, for all thr insistence on getting free flow of beer, they don't really drink that much. As in, they don't hi the value they are paying. Plus its obvious they are ripped off cos they don't let us locals or Aussies help negotiate n plan such parties. There are so many fantastic deals a budget of $70 can fetch yet they just settle
for such. Leaves us sighing at times. Think it would be much cheaper just to order ala-carte n happy hour. Still pay much lesser.
After it ended, I've finished 6-7 mugs of draught beer in the 2 hrs of free flow. So got my money's worth. I was tipsy but can still think, walk in straight line, no spinning world. Can feel the alcohol but not as strong as other times when I drank alot of spirits or Martinis. Walked home after and reached home in 10minutes. It was unexpectedly more enjoyable than some ofthe other parties I've been to, think it's cos I've talked more, the beer tastes good too plus I got the value for it - for a change. Whether I would go for another, mostly no unless it's a value proposition.
I reached home and drank 2 cups of water n was too full to drink the soup my mom made. Then I changed and slept. With the amount of alcohol, I had a good night's sleep. Slept through until I woke up naturally at 8.30am!
Was feeling okay, went over to buy breakfast but after that, felt sickly. Like the flu flaring up. Ate meds and rested until guitar. But after guitar, flu flared up again. I thought of killing time by watching a movie. After lunch at PO-MO, I actually walked over to the Cathay. But headache starting up and alternating light-headedness n heavy-headedness. Decided to go home instead.
Reached home, ate meds and lie in bed. My mind is alert and can't fall asleep but kept sweating. My mom said I dragged on too long, didn't let body rest enough. It's a pity I can't head out or stay out longer. Will miss the Halloween signts n dinner but really don't think I would want to wear the same outfit even if I am not sick.
Would just want a simple meal to catch up but not have to 'kill' so many hours waiting for the meal. Maybe cos I want my weekends to last longer, so I prefer to be out more in the rapier afternoon. More hours to do things before dinner.
If I am at home, just meet for dinner, I also find that it shortens time. Cos I can't make any plans inbetween dinner time. Rather meet for lunch or around tea time. Still have time to do other stuff then wait until dinner and after dinner to walk around.
Then if I am already out, it's even worst. Got so many hours to kill. At least 4-5hrs in town, alone. What is there to do, that would interest n occupy me for that long? It's very difficult in my normal physical state. Can't go gym cos no public ones that near. Go home and come out again is a very time-wasting and tiring thing. Spend 1hr to go back then shortly have to travel 1hr out again. I won't make it out of the house, too much effort. Shopping doent occupy nor interest me much. I don't like to browse too long hours at bookshop nor can I read properly in a cafe. I don't see the merits of sitting at a cafe to just play I-touch or people watch for 4hrs. Nor just settling for a movie to while away time. I would rather have the time to either rest, exercise at gym or practice guitar. All which requiresme to be at my area. Though I make the effort to come out. Having to while away several hours alone, doing things that don't really appeal to me, is q waste of time, effort n by the time, I am mentally n physically tired cos doing all those is taxing.
A Sat is a precious day. Make full use of the morning, afternoon and evening hours to do something useful, relaxing n enjoyable. Not wait until evening to start. From 7pm until 10pm, it's just 3 hrs before everywhere is closing. Then really nothing much to do except eating or drinking. A bit more then it's midnight, and it's over. I wanna stretch it out by enjoying the morning with breakfast, free n easy hours until it's time for guitar. Though I sometimeswinder why I put so much effort to go down for it but after it, there's many more hours to do things before evening arrives. On days, I can even go gym by 5pm-6pm and finsih by 7-8pm. Still have a few hours to watch tv, read manga, relax before it's time to sleep. That's an ideal.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Time and Effort Dilemma
Last night I was typing this very long passage about the above dilemna but lost it when I tried to post it. Here's a repost.
The time and effort dilemma exist for everybody. It manifests very acutely at work. On a 2x2 matrix, there is the 4 matrixes,
more time, less effort more time, more effort
less time, less effort less time, more effort
For most of us, we are paid a salary for putting in effort and time at work. If one could put in lesser time and lesser effort and yet be paid the same, it would bring about more satisfaction. Cos we would perceive that we are getting a better deal. Then how to bring about putting in less time and effort. This comes about by being efficient. It would mean having to commit lesser hours and lesser effort to the job. Methods of efficiency differs, be it a systematic one or it could be personal eg priortise tasks, a to-do list, breaking task down into small steps and doing, filing and doing things a bit at a time. There are many of these little things one can do to 'help yourself'. So consequentially we end up with spending lesser time and effort. Though pay didnt increase, its being paid the same for less. Job satisifaction increase of sorts.
My previous job at MOE had me working at the more time, more effort matrix. Though my salary was higher, everything else is more. I value my personal time but had to put in long hours and working intensely. Couldnt continue on with that type infinitely. Job satisfaction was low cos I felt salary-wise, doesnt compensate me enough for all that I am doing. Decided I need a rest from burning out.
My current job meant I had to take a pay-cut. Its quite a bit of paycut of several hundred dollars and also less bonus. Only 1 month compared to the previous of at least 2-2.5 months. The trade-off is the lesser effort involved. The hours are longer but still end earlier enough in the day, like office hours. Also I have free time in the working hours unlike previously. So there is some satisfaction from just the pure effort-time matrix. But the whole matrix shifts to the left due to the lowered salary.
I decided to expend some time and effort outside of work to derive added income. It meant I had to put in extra hours and effort thrice weekly. It wasnt easy at all. Could feel the fatique and tiredness. But bo bian, its my decision to do it to make the extra money. Whether one is able to put in extra time and effort depends partly on your job, whether there are available hours and also personally, whether you can and will make the time. Definitely money wont drop in the lap without some exchange of time and effort. There's no free or easy lunch.
Luckily for me, I have my investments, which helps me generate some extra income. I had to put in some extra time and effort to monitor them daily, make decisions daily. But I dont take any short-cuts. Its not really possible to realize gains if I just take the so-called easy way of "listening to what other people say and tell me". I do my own research and make my own decisions. I want to make gains NOT lose my capital. So just meant more time and effort.
With the 3 income streams, I actually almost matched my previous Nett salary. Definitely not able to match the Gross salary yet. The rest depends on the stock market. Whether I can sell off and realize the profits. Though at times I ask myself, why is it that I had to do 3 of these just so I could match my previous income? Why not just stick to one and enjoy the same income level. The matter of fact is that I dont think I could continue on at my previous job. Its too much time and effort that left me in a perpetual zombie mode, grumpy and dissatisfied. At least though I needed 3 income just to match, but overall I am happier in a sense. I dont really think I would be able to manage my investments along side the job.
But as fatique catches up with me from the extra time and effort, I do find myself wishing for my job to pay more, so I dont have to do the assignments. Next year, I might just be doing one instead of current two. It meant halving the income. I could try to live with lowered income of sort. Even with investments, investment gains realised are never certain. Depends on market conditions. So if my main stable job gives me more, can reduce the time and effort on others.
Its the same dilemma for other stuff. Things like exercising, learning a course, learning an instrument, going out. All of them requires extra time and effort. It seems the only things that dont really requires that are watching tv and sleeping. That's why many of us do it mostly on weekends. There's still time but really much much less effort. Just too bad those 2 activities dont pay us monetarily. Also they dont count for anything when looking back at one's life. There's no sense of accomplishment nor is there any skills gathered. Furthermore doing these meant clashing with work - time and effort. All these whittle down personal time.
I have quite a bit on my plate and something gave. I gave up tv and gaming. I only watch tv on weekends and its only to watch recorded cable tv shows at one go. Then I havent gamed on my PS2 in years. Even my PSP is neglected. On public transport, I find myself listening to mp3 more than playing games.
To sum it all up, at least for me. " The worthwhile things are the ones that requires time and effort." No free lunch, easy way out. Sometimes the 'easiest way' is just to start something in small steps and continue and persisting. Doing a bit a day, meant accumulation starts. Over time surely there is something more tangible at the end. Yet due to time-energy constraints, its best to do a few things that one can manage, then priortise and do. A schedule helps. Surely at times, some lapses here and there but overall still a more positive picture.
I have work stuff to do during work hours. I am having more and more to do but I try to clear them during work hours, not bring back home. I still have the holiday work syndrome. Easier to segregate work and personal life this way. At work I file my stuff and clear things as quickly as I can. Trying to work smart so that I can enjoy the free time to do other stuff.
Though now, my weekdays are finally freed up. Glad for the lax. Need to rest my tired and a bit sickly body. On the weekly agenda includes - exercise 2 times, practice guitar, monitor stocks and rest.
The time and effort dilemma exist for everybody. It manifests very acutely at work. On a 2x2 matrix, there is the 4 matrixes,
more time, less effort more time, more effort
less time, less effort less time, more effort
For most of us, we are paid a salary for putting in effort and time at work. If one could put in lesser time and lesser effort and yet be paid the same, it would bring about more satisfaction. Cos we would perceive that we are getting a better deal. Then how to bring about putting in less time and effort. This comes about by being efficient. It would mean having to commit lesser hours and lesser effort to the job. Methods of efficiency differs, be it a systematic one or it could be personal eg priortise tasks, a to-do list, breaking task down into small steps and doing, filing and doing things a bit at a time. There are many of these little things one can do to 'help yourself'. So consequentially we end up with spending lesser time and effort. Though pay didnt increase, its being paid the same for less. Job satisifaction increase of sorts.
My previous job at MOE had me working at the more time, more effort matrix. Though my salary was higher, everything else is more. I value my personal time but had to put in long hours and working intensely. Couldnt continue on with that type infinitely. Job satisfaction was low cos I felt salary-wise, doesnt compensate me enough for all that I am doing. Decided I need a rest from burning out.
My current job meant I had to take a pay-cut. Its quite a bit of paycut of several hundred dollars and also less bonus. Only 1 month compared to the previous of at least 2-2.5 months. The trade-off is the lesser effort involved. The hours are longer but still end earlier enough in the day, like office hours. Also I have free time in the working hours unlike previously. So there is some satisfaction from just the pure effort-time matrix. But the whole matrix shifts to the left due to the lowered salary.
I decided to expend some time and effort outside of work to derive added income. It meant I had to put in extra hours and effort thrice weekly. It wasnt easy at all. Could feel the fatique and tiredness. But bo bian, its my decision to do it to make the extra money. Whether one is able to put in extra time and effort depends partly on your job, whether there are available hours and also personally, whether you can and will make the time. Definitely money wont drop in the lap without some exchange of time and effort. There's no free or easy lunch.
Luckily for me, I have my investments, which helps me generate some extra income. I had to put in some extra time and effort to monitor them daily, make decisions daily. But I dont take any short-cuts. Its not really possible to realize gains if I just take the so-called easy way of "listening to what other people say and tell me". I do my own research and make my own decisions. I want to make gains NOT lose my capital. So just meant more time and effort.
With the 3 income streams, I actually almost matched my previous Nett salary. Definitely not able to match the Gross salary yet. The rest depends on the stock market. Whether I can sell off and realize the profits. Though at times I ask myself, why is it that I had to do 3 of these just so I could match my previous income? Why not just stick to one and enjoy the same income level. The matter of fact is that I dont think I could continue on at my previous job. Its too much time and effort that left me in a perpetual zombie mode, grumpy and dissatisfied. At least though I needed 3 income just to match, but overall I am happier in a sense. I dont really think I would be able to manage my investments along side the job.
But as fatique catches up with me from the extra time and effort, I do find myself wishing for my job to pay more, so I dont have to do the assignments. Next year, I might just be doing one instead of current two. It meant halving the income. I could try to live with lowered income of sort. Even with investments, investment gains realised are never certain. Depends on market conditions. So if my main stable job gives me more, can reduce the time and effort on others.
Its the same dilemma for other stuff. Things like exercising, learning a course, learning an instrument, going out. All of them requires extra time and effort. It seems the only things that dont really requires that are watching tv and sleeping. That's why many of us do it mostly on weekends. There's still time but really much much less effort. Just too bad those 2 activities dont pay us monetarily. Also they dont count for anything when looking back at one's life. There's no sense of accomplishment nor is there any skills gathered. Furthermore doing these meant clashing with work - time and effort. All these whittle down personal time.
I have quite a bit on my plate and something gave. I gave up tv and gaming. I only watch tv on weekends and its only to watch recorded cable tv shows at one go. Then I havent gamed on my PS2 in years. Even my PSP is neglected. On public transport, I find myself listening to mp3 more than playing games.
To sum it all up, at least for me. " The worthwhile things are the ones that requires time and effort." No free lunch, easy way out. Sometimes the 'easiest way' is just to start something in small steps and continue and persisting. Doing a bit a day, meant accumulation starts. Over time surely there is something more tangible at the end. Yet due to time-energy constraints, its best to do a few things that one can manage, then priortise and do. A schedule helps. Surely at times, some lapses here and there but overall still a more positive picture.
I have work stuff to do during work hours. I am having more and more to do but I try to clear them during work hours, not bring back home. I still have the holiday work syndrome. Easier to segregate work and personal life this way. At work I file my stuff and clear things as quickly as I can. Trying to work smart so that I can enjoy the free time to do other stuff.
Though now, my weekdays are finally freed up. Glad for the lax. Need to rest my tired and a bit sickly body. On the weekly agenda includes - exercise 2 times, practice guitar, monitor stocks and rest.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Why so many many parties n invitations? S1, 2, 3, whole place plus Pink(ladies)
In the end on Sun, I didn't go for third cardio. Will try again this week. Good news is that today, another of the pants went back to being loose, but since it's a size bigger, so it's not much yet. Still got long way to go.
This Friday, my mouth agreed to go for another level's party... Cos I work across levels, so other levels have tried to invite me for their monthly or termly party. So far I've 'missed' one from both levels which I don't belong to. Missed another 2 from my own level, those were mainly due to assignments n lessons. But there's still the Ladies party plus whole-school parties.... That's really alot. To cut the story short, I'll be $66 poorer cos I opened my mouth to agree. So it meant I would be drinking at least 6 mugs of beer from the tap... So I have to watch the calories the whole week. Better squeeze in as much gym as I could. Also need to find time to cut hair, make myself practice guitar n not keep putting it off.
Today settling the paper work of my collegue's insurance case to get ready to get a legal counsel, cos the other insurance is sitting on his claims n no payment forthcoming. So Bo bian, have to help him this last part, to settle the paperworks, ger duplicates receipts n invoices n medical report from the hospital again. Then going to pass to lawyer to represent. Hopefully can get the lawyer in, by this week cos this case might have been dragged out a bit too long by the other party's "inaction".
Think I would look forward to the beer from tap this Friday. Still think they kena katuk but Bo bian, my other collegue helped out n gave them so much cheaper deals with much much better food but they so hung up about the free-flow beer for just 2 hrs... After this, I won't be going for anymore of this level's party cos technically I don't belong, so it already meant I got invited to so many more parties compared to the other local collegues. My pocket and waist-line cannot tahan too. Rather spend that same amount eating way way way more quality food. With what I am paying, I could eat that crab buffet n still have change. So definitely no more.
This Friday, my mouth agreed to go for another level's party... Cos I work across levels, so other levels have tried to invite me for their monthly or termly party. So far I've 'missed' one from both levels which I don't belong to. Missed another 2 from my own level, those were mainly due to assignments n lessons. But there's still the Ladies party plus whole-school parties.... That's really alot. To cut the story short, I'll be $66 poorer cos I opened my mouth to agree. So it meant I would be drinking at least 6 mugs of beer from the tap... So I have to watch the calories the whole week. Better squeeze in as much gym as I could. Also need to find time to cut hair, make myself practice guitar n not keep putting it off.
Today settling the paper work of my collegue's insurance case to get ready to get a legal counsel, cos the other insurance is sitting on his claims n no payment forthcoming. So Bo bian, have to help him this last part, to settle the paperworks, ger duplicates receipts n invoices n medical report from the hospital again. Then going to pass to lawyer to represent. Hopefully can get the lawyer in, by this week cos this case might have been dragged out a bit too long by the other party's "inaction".
Think I would look forward to the beer from tap this Friday. Still think they kena katuk but Bo bian, my other collegue helped out n gave them so much cheaper deals with much much better food but they so hung up about the free-flow beer for just 2 hrs... After this, I won't be going for anymore of this level's party cos technically I don't belong, so it already meant I got invited to so many more parties compared to the other local collegues. My pocket and waist-line cannot tahan too. Rather spend that same amount eating way way way more quality food. With what I am paying, I could eat that crab buffet n still have change. So definitely no more.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Stay-home weekend plus rain
Friday was having some mild cramps n decided to head home. Changed plans of gy
that night. Think I watched cable tv and stoned infront of laptop. Not really productive I guess.
Sat is stay-home cos my guitar was postponed, and everyone else was busy with wedding lunch n dinners to attend. So I stayed at home. Woke up naturally at 9am and headed over to buy breakfast for family. After that watched cable tv again. I was quite determined to go for gym. So at 6pm, despite the rain I changed and headed for gym. Felt very accomplished after that. Felt more 'settled' n no more of the unsettling feeling staying indoors.
Today my mom and two sisters headed to Genting until tue evening. Home
with dad and a list of daily chores to do. Plus sister needed me to check her phone and emails for interviews. Yep. Thinking of heading to gym to do the 3rd slotfor this week. I am considering making this a pure cardio, meaning stepper, rower and stationary bike. 1hr of cardio. At least it won't make my gym workouts too repeatitive cos if I do the same regime 3 times a week, it gets boring and might put me off. Try this out and see how.
Next week is last week of assignment plus payment. Yipee. But at work hot some sorta open class aka observation of sorts. Plus tha piece of admin... See how things go then. I am just gonna charge my batteries and try to reset my irritation n cranky meters. Hopefully with the exercise routines back to 2-3, I'll be less irritable. My tolerance was waning especially with certain 'silly or stupid' questions asked to me by the two new collegues whom I have to work with. Oh well... Just take it a day at a time.
that night. Think I watched cable tv and stoned infront of laptop. Not really productive I guess.
Sat is stay-home cos my guitar was postponed, and everyone else was busy with wedding lunch n dinners to attend. So I stayed at home. Woke up naturally at 9am and headed over to buy breakfast for family. After that watched cable tv again. I was quite determined to go for gym. So at 6pm, despite the rain I changed and headed for gym. Felt very accomplished after that. Felt more 'settled' n no more of the unsettling feeling staying indoors.
Today my mom and two sisters headed to Genting until tue evening. Home
with dad and a list of daily chores to do. Plus sister needed me to check her phone and emails for interviews. Yep. Thinking of heading to gym to do the 3rd slotfor this week. I am considering making this a pure cardio, meaning stepper, rower and stationary bike. 1hr of cardio. At least it won't make my gym workouts too repeatitive cos if I do the same regime 3 times a week, it gets boring and might put me off. Try this out and see how.
Next week is last week of assignment plus payment. Yipee. But at work hot some sorta open class aka observation of sorts. Plus tha piece of admin... See how things go then. I am just gonna charge my batteries and try to reset my irritation n cranky meters. Hopefully with the exercise routines back to 2-3, I'll be less irritable. My tolerance was waning especially with certain 'silly or stupid' questions asked to me by the two new collegues whom I have to work with. Oh well... Just take it a day at a time.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Admin work suddenly drop on my lap
This is a bit of work grouse. It just happened out of the blue, after everything has ended. Like after the event and just before cca.
I was doing up one of the activity for a collegue's lesson, when A told me she was told by B to tell me that I should continue this ALT spreadsheet that he was doing. Basically the collegues have no idea which class we would be going into. Initially in the earlier days, I did it by counting manually and writing it down in my teacher book, which I still do for my Sec 3 slots. Then I would inform them. Then out of the blue, B decided to do for the Sec 1 level. He clustered certain classes together such that I was with each teacher for a cluster of 4 lessons.
BUT when now you are asking me to take over suddenly. And I opened up the excel format, its too complicated. There's like monitoring every class for the Sec 1 is at the nth lesson, then choose to cluster the classes that are having the same nth lesson. Basically the story is its toooooo taxing to manually do it, unless there was a system that is used. So I would have to ask it from the horse's mouth tomorrow.
IF there is no system to aid this, I would just make it simple and easy for me. I would make my own format. I see NO reason why I should continue this taxing format when the whole aim about this is to inform all the rest earlier when exactly we are going in for the lessons. Plus I would have to print and put on relevant teacher's tables weekly.
It puts a sore taste in my mouth. Partly was that I was initially doing it manually and counting it originally. THEN you decided to take it over. Now after 1.5 terms, you decided to 'give' it back to me to do instead. You left behind this complex excel spreadsheet and obviously I am not going to follow if its so inconvenient for me to update and make a weekly update. I dont mind doing this cos its just a simple job of counting and writing down which class we are going into, except it can be done via excel for the benefit of others. BUT giving it back to me in the mid of the term... I think since you wanted to do it, then continue lor. Duh!
So tomorrow I am going to ask B about the existence of a system. If not, I would do it my way. The easy, fast and most effortless way. My excel skills are considered good, but its not for me to use it to follow your complex table for something so trival. I rather use it on other things, like my stocks and savings.
This left me sore though generally today was a pretty good day. I was looking forward to the end of the day after cca. But being told this out of the blue by a collegue who was only helping to relay a message cos the collegue wasnt around, kinda spoils the mood. After cca, which also left me frowning a bit cos of the level of skill... but nevermind. I went back to my seat and finished up by writing up two big tongue twisters. Then that finished my work. Walked up to the cooking room and chatted with collegue and complaining about the sudden piece of admin work. And she told me that they actually have a system they use for timetabling. So I would ask B instead. Actually B is a good guy, he is dilligent and he actually do up all the activities, so I just carry out in class. So there might be a miscom. I would clarify. Felt better after that.
Let me think about how to do ice-cream proto-typing or work on the next recipe, cheese cake.
I was doing up one of the activity for a collegue's lesson, when A told me she was told by B to tell me that I should continue this ALT spreadsheet that he was doing. Basically the collegues have no idea which class we would be going into. Initially in the earlier days, I did it by counting manually and writing it down in my teacher book, which I still do for my Sec 3 slots. Then I would inform them. Then out of the blue, B decided to do for the Sec 1 level. He clustered certain classes together such that I was with each teacher for a cluster of 4 lessons.
BUT when now you are asking me to take over suddenly. And I opened up the excel format, its too complicated. There's like monitoring every class for the Sec 1 is at the nth lesson, then choose to cluster the classes that are having the same nth lesson. Basically the story is its toooooo taxing to manually do it, unless there was a system that is used. So I would have to ask it from the horse's mouth tomorrow.
IF there is no system to aid this, I would just make it simple and easy for me. I would make my own format. I see NO reason why I should continue this taxing format when the whole aim about this is to inform all the rest earlier when exactly we are going in for the lessons. Plus I would have to print and put on relevant teacher's tables weekly.
It puts a sore taste in my mouth. Partly was that I was initially doing it manually and counting it originally. THEN you decided to take it over. Now after 1.5 terms, you decided to 'give' it back to me to do instead. You left behind this complex excel spreadsheet and obviously I am not going to follow if its so inconvenient for me to update and make a weekly update. I dont mind doing this cos its just a simple job of counting and writing down which class we are going into, except it can be done via excel for the benefit of others. BUT giving it back to me in the mid of the term... I think since you wanted to do it, then continue lor. Duh!
So tomorrow I am going to ask B about the existence of a system. If not, I would do it my way. The easy, fast and most effortless way. My excel skills are considered good, but its not for me to use it to follow your complex table for something so trival. I rather use it on other things, like my stocks and savings.
This left me sore though generally today was a pretty good day. I was looking forward to the end of the day after cca. But being told this out of the blue by a collegue who was only helping to relay a message cos the collegue wasnt around, kinda spoils the mood. After cca, which also left me frowning a bit cos of the level of skill... but nevermind. I went back to my seat and finished up by writing up two big tongue twisters. Then that finished my work. Walked up to the cooking room and chatted with collegue and complaining about the sudden piece of admin work. And she told me that they actually have a system they use for timetabling. So I would ask B instead. Actually B is a good guy, he is dilligent and he actually do up all the activities, so I just carry out in class. So there might be a miscom. I would clarify. Felt better after that.
Let me think about how to do ice-cream proto-typing or work on the next recipe, cheese cake.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Finally...
Headed to the first gym session this week. Last week only went once plus delayed until mid-week meant that I've broke the 7-day break between a routine. Felt way way weaker. Only did one set for the free weights. Think I have to build up my fittness level again.
Its great to finally make myself go to gym. Because of the gym reduction, I attribute my tighter pants, weight gain, fall in energy level, rise in crankiness and grouses to it, less patience and less smiley. So after the gym, suddenly my state of well-being went up. Feeling accomplished and brain not thinking of anything work-related. Think I really NEED to keep up at least twice a week. Otherwise I would morph back into a grumpy, tired and impatient educator.
Finally picked up the dusty guitar after almost a month of not even touching it. Watched a you-tube for "I dont want to live on the moon" by Burt in Sesame street. Printed out the guitar chords and inspired to try. Then wiped off the dust from the guitar and tuned it before practising. Slightly better when I looked at the previous lesson BUT there are still many parts I dont understand. It doesnt sound like what I heard... argh felt my irriation meter rising. Practiced the basic but still nowhere near playing the song.... so decided to take a break. Otherwise, I might just ignore the guitar again for weeks...
Think a break is good. Though it didnt mean I wasnt thinking about guitar. But sometimes forcing oneself to do something kills the passion and interest. So the breather is welcome. Same for assignment, glad next week is the last one. I am going to take several weeks off first.
Plan to pick up the gym and guitar routine and continue on. There's still 9 more weeks of work to go... That's almost a full MOE term... body still not used to that. The lack of exercise meant my stamina also lowered...
So many incentives to exercise, I just have to and this is one exception to 'taking a breather'. This exercise routine really have to persist.
Its great to finally make myself go to gym. Because of the gym reduction, I attribute my tighter pants, weight gain, fall in energy level, rise in crankiness and grouses to it, less patience and less smiley. So after the gym, suddenly my state of well-being went up. Feeling accomplished and brain not thinking of anything work-related. Think I really NEED to keep up at least twice a week. Otherwise I would morph back into a grumpy, tired and impatient educator.
Finally picked up the dusty guitar after almost a month of not even touching it. Watched a you-tube for "I dont want to live on the moon" by Burt in Sesame street. Printed out the guitar chords and inspired to try. Then wiped off the dust from the guitar and tuned it before practising. Slightly better when I looked at the previous lesson BUT there are still many parts I dont understand. It doesnt sound like what I heard... argh felt my irriation meter rising. Practiced the basic but still nowhere near playing the song.... so decided to take a break. Otherwise, I might just ignore the guitar again for weeks...
Think a break is good. Though it didnt mean I wasnt thinking about guitar. But sometimes forcing oneself to do something kills the passion and interest. So the breather is welcome. Same for assignment, glad next week is the last one. I am going to take several weeks off first.
Plan to pick up the gym and guitar routine and continue on. There's still 9 more weeks of work to go... That's almost a full MOE term... body still not used to that. The lack of exercise meant my stamina also lowered...
So many incentives to exercise, I just have to and this is one exception to 'taking a breather'. This exercise routine really have to persist.
Friday, October 15, 2010
Mini maple pancake - plain with maple syrup & chocolate chips
I gradually brought all the ingredients I bought to put at a corner in the prep room in the kitchen at workplace. Knowing today, I have enough free time to start cooking, I brought the fresh ingredients over, eggs and butter.
Today's agenda is to make mini-pancakes from scratch, flour, baking soda, powder, milk, egg, butter and maple syrup. Then instead of using a griddle to cook, bake for abt 8mins in the oven. Had enough to make 3 batches.
First try prototyping batch I baked too long so it's a bit dry.Cos I don't really eat pancakes to know what is the exact texture. Is it supposed to be crispy, hard, soft, moist? Later my local collegues told me should be soft and moist... So shorten timing and try out remaining batter from first batch with chocolate chips sprinkled. I ate one and it's moist and soft and the chocs were hersheys semi-sweet so it taste good.
Then made 2 more batches, one is with chocolate chips generously mixed in, the other is plain but can dip in maple syrup. Then after they are done, I took 7 of them back home. The rest I arranged on 2 plates and with a small bowl with generous maple syrup, brought down for collegues.
Personally I prefer the plain ones, it has some maple syrup in the batter already and looks n taste okay by itself but once it's dipped generously with maple syrup, very light tasting. The choc chips are good enough to eat by itself. Can't taste the maple syrup even when dipped with maple syrup. The choc chips are not that sweet, so it taste good too. Learnt that if there's lots of chips, it enhances the taste. Wouldn't mind eating this version too.
When I brought it down, there werea few collegues standing around and they dug in. High praises, I was too full after sampling 3 of the plain ones and 1 choc chip from the 1st batch. Had a delicious lunch at Thai express. The pineapple rice set is good. Enjoy the tapioca too. Really really too full from all these. I just ate my dinner. Try to eat normally.
It's already 7.36pm, really hard to dig myself out... Just settle for animes and relax and sleep. Tomorrow I better control the ice-cream buffet at the Udders course... :( little wonders my weight is still going up n down....
Today's agenda is to make mini-pancakes from scratch, flour, baking soda, powder, milk, egg, butter and maple syrup. Then instead of using a griddle to cook, bake for abt 8mins in the oven. Had enough to make 3 batches.
First try prototyping batch I baked too long so it's a bit dry.Cos I don't really eat pancakes to know what is the exact texture. Is it supposed to be crispy, hard, soft, moist? Later my local collegues told me should be soft and moist... So shorten timing and try out remaining batter from first batch with chocolate chips sprinkled. I ate one and it's moist and soft and the chocs were hersheys semi-sweet so it taste good.
Then made 2 more batches, one is with chocolate chips generously mixed in, the other is plain but can dip in maple syrup. Then after they are done, I took 7 of them back home. The rest I arranged on 2 plates and with a small bowl with generous maple syrup, brought down for collegues.
Personally I prefer the plain ones, it has some maple syrup in the batter already and looks n taste okay by itself but once it's dipped generously with maple syrup, very light tasting. The choc chips are good enough to eat by itself. Can't taste the maple syrup even when dipped with maple syrup. The choc chips are not that sweet, so it taste good too. Learnt that if there's lots of chips, it enhances the taste. Wouldn't mind eating this version too.
When I brought it down, there werea few collegues standing around and they dug in. High praises, I was too full after sampling 3 of the plain ones and 1 choc chip from the 1st batch. Had a delicious lunch at Thai express. The pineapple rice set is good. Enjoy the tapioca too. Really really too full from all these. I just ate my dinner. Try to eat normally.
It's already 7.36pm, really hard to dig myself out... Just settle for animes and relax and sleep. Tomorrow I better control the ice-cream buffet at the Udders course... :( little wonders my weight is still going up n down....
Saturday, October 09, 2010
An Epiphany from peeling and eating sweet potatoes...?
It was a simple act. Peel some Jap sweet potatoes infront of the laptop. I suddenly got an epiphany (sudden realisation) about one aspect of myself.
It was a hot and boring afternoon. I was debating whether to go for gym or even head out while seated infront of the laptop. Then my mom came over with a small plate with 3 jap sweet potatoes.
To be honest, I am NOT a fan of the jap species cos they are so miserably thin and its not easy to peel them. I prefer the bigger species of sweet potatoes that taste sweeter too. So I started peeling grudgingly cos as each was very thin, it meant, I have to peel quite a lot of skin off for a relatively little bit of potatoe. It also meant, I have to wait quite a long while to finish peeling off all the skin before I could get a few mouthful. That was all my past experience.
Then after putting the small plate of jap sweet potatoes, I made a face and asked my mom how she eats it. She just breaks off a small stick, about 1 inch. Then breaks into half. Peel off the skin and eats. I tried that for the first time but realized I wasnt happy with it, mainly cos it meant I have to peel some, eat some, then go back to peeling.
Which wasnt what I usually do. I would peel off almost all the skin at a go and then enjoy the fruit of the labour. It hit me then. Why I didnt enjoy eating this. Its cos I couldnt do the "Sian Ku Hou Tian" (hard work first then enjoy) which is the way I usually do. This time round, I have to "do some work, enjoy the fruit" and continue again. I realized that I should be able to do some work, enjoy part of it before repeating.
Why so hung up about having to do all the work in a go, then enjoy everything later. A bit too depriving at times. So I settled for peeling parts of the not-so-tasty-and-thin-Jap-sweet-potatoes and then eating, then going back to peeling and eating another part. Its not the way I would have liked to approach but the other approach is okay with the current me.
Actually this is the first time, I actually did this half work, half enjoy thingy. Not that I dont do this at work. But I realize that even at work, I rather finish all the work first before I play. This reminds me that I am and can be more flexible with the way I approach some of the stuff in my life.
Wow all these from just eating sweet potatoes in a hot and lazy afternoon.
It was a hot and boring afternoon. I was debating whether to go for gym or even head out while seated infront of the laptop. Then my mom came over with a small plate with 3 jap sweet potatoes.
To be honest, I am NOT a fan of the jap species cos they are so miserably thin and its not easy to peel them. I prefer the bigger species of sweet potatoes that taste sweeter too. So I started peeling grudgingly cos as each was very thin, it meant, I have to peel quite a lot of skin off for a relatively little bit of potatoe. It also meant, I have to wait quite a long while to finish peeling off all the skin before I could get a few mouthful. That was all my past experience.
Then after putting the small plate of jap sweet potatoes, I made a face and asked my mom how she eats it. She just breaks off a small stick, about 1 inch. Then breaks into half. Peel off the skin and eats. I tried that for the first time but realized I wasnt happy with it, mainly cos it meant I have to peel some, eat some, then go back to peeling.
Which wasnt what I usually do. I would peel off almost all the skin at a go and then enjoy the fruit of the labour. It hit me then. Why I didnt enjoy eating this. Its cos I couldnt do the "Sian Ku Hou Tian" (hard work first then enjoy) which is the way I usually do. This time round, I have to "do some work, enjoy the fruit" and continue again. I realized that I should be able to do some work, enjoy part of it before repeating.
Why so hung up about having to do all the work in a go, then enjoy everything later. A bit too depriving at times. So I settled for peeling parts of the not-so-tasty-and-thin-Jap-sweet-potatoes and then eating, then going back to peeling and eating another part. Its not the way I would have liked to approach but the other approach is okay with the current me.
Actually this is the first time, I actually did this half work, half enjoy thingy. Not that I dont do this at work. But I realize that even at work, I rather finish all the work first before I play. This reminds me that I am and can be more flexible with the way I approach some of the stuff in my life.
Wow all these from just eating sweet potatoes in a hot and lazy afternoon.
Thursday, October 07, 2010
Cold and creamy pudding with banana n wafers
Copied a recipe for an easy pudding that is cold and creamy and topped with bananans n some vanilla wafers. So after talking, checking stuff online and then a delicious lunch of curry fish head at ginza, I started after students were dismissed.
It's pretty easy to make. The only thing about it is the lack of mention of the no of servings for the portions I was making. Then after it's combined, it's a bit too liquidy, so meant have to chill. No mention of chiller or freezer. Due to time constraint, I put 2 in the freezer to see how they hold up. The rest I put in the chiller.
I made 8 bowls and 4 each using 2 diff types of vanilla wafers. Wanted to see if the block type or the long thin cigar type matches better. So I took out the one with the block. Interestingly, the texture turns to ice-cream style. And I had tasted it before chilling, too sweet... But too liquidy. After freezing, it tastes better, can tasted the banana cos it's put in and then chilled. Think it's good enough without the wafers. Think need to freeze a bit longer, put more sliced bananas and maube just use one long vanilla to garnishjust b4 serving.
After eating the first proto-type, I was writhing from the sweetness. The other proto-type I kept in the freezer for tomorrow.
I noted that the other 6 bowls remain liquidy despite 2 over hours in the chiller. It meant that unless I want to serve tomorrow, otherwise I should put into the freezer. I didn't want to bring back home. Partly nobody eating plus mom and dad shouldn't be eating this... So with an hour to spare before it's time for me to go home, I chilled the 6 and then brought it downstairs. Collegues were marking, and not so much of it to pass around, so I just put on the table and then return the tray. Dunno if anyone would eat. Think they would. So I returned the tray, left one more to see how it fares after it's mostly frozen solid, see if it can hold or is too hard, etc etc.
After all these, the curry fish head and the bowl of cold and creamy vanilla pudding eith banana n vanilla wafers. I felt too full. After work, I headed home, tired. Took a nap of 50mins and woke up to head to gum around 7.30pm. Didn't do any leg exercise cos knee caps still crackling, sore. Did stomach and arms plus stretch. Came home then ate dinner.
Resting up after dinner. Going to bath and sleep earlier. Partly cos I want to clear some checking of files tomorrow. I be 'free' the whole day. So want to clear that first then going to continue to check the other proto-type. Won't be cooking. See if all the tasks I have to do tomorrow doesn't occupy all the hours, I would consider asking for the use of the guitar again. Work before play, so can play in peace and no guilt. Plus no last minute pile-up of work to clear. Less stress this way. Think that's a good plan to stick to.
It's pretty easy to make. The only thing about it is the lack of mention of the no of servings for the portions I was making. Then after it's combined, it's a bit too liquidy, so meant have to chill. No mention of chiller or freezer. Due to time constraint, I put 2 in the freezer to see how they hold up. The rest I put in the chiller.
I made 8 bowls and 4 each using 2 diff types of vanilla wafers. Wanted to see if the block type or the long thin cigar type matches better. So I took out the one with the block. Interestingly, the texture turns to ice-cream style. And I had tasted it before chilling, too sweet... But too liquidy. After freezing, it tastes better, can tasted the banana cos it's put in and then chilled. Think it's good enough without the wafers. Think need to freeze a bit longer, put more sliced bananas and maube just use one long vanilla to garnishjust b4 serving.
After eating the first proto-type, I was writhing from the sweetness. The other proto-type I kept in the freezer for tomorrow.
I noted that the other 6 bowls remain liquidy despite 2 over hours in the chiller. It meant that unless I want to serve tomorrow, otherwise I should put into the freezer. I didn't want to bring back home. Partly nobody eating plus mom and dad shouldn't be eating this... So with an hour to spare before it's time for me to go home, I chilled the 6 and then brought it downstairs. Collegues were marking, and not so much of it to pass around, so I just put on the table and then return the tray. Dunno if anyone would eat. Think they would. So I returned the tray, left one more to see how it fares after it's mostly frozen solid, see if it can hold or is too hard, etc etc.
After all these, the curry fish head and the bowl of cold and creamy vanilla pudding eith banana n vanilla wafers. I felt too full. After work, I headed home, tired. Took a nap of 50mins and woke up to head to gum around 7.30pm. Didn't do any leg exercise cos knee caps still crackling, sore. Did stomach and arms plus stretch. Came home then ate dinner.
Resting up after dinner. Going to bath and sleep earlier. Partly cos I want to clear some checking of files tomorrow. I be 'free' the whole day. So want to clear that first then going to continue to check the other proto-type. Won't be cooking. See if all the tasks I have to do tomorrow doesn't occupy all the hours, I would consider asking for the use of the guitar again. Work before play, so can play in peace and no guilt. Plus no last minute pile-up of work to clear. Less stress this way. Think that's a good plan to stick to.
Wednesday, October 06, 2010
Paid to do nothing?
Yes this thurday and friday are exams.
And for the whole day, I have nothing to do.
Yes. Nothing.
I have to go for work as normal and end as normal. Without a thing to do...
Though at times I am glad for the lax. Am I getting too lax?
Like now, I have just almost killed an hour surfing stuff online and watching a few youtube videos. To be fair, I had a long day today, with 3 lessons taught by me solo in a row. Then have cleaning supervision and followed by another Eng class where I go in to assist. I want to help out with the exam by helping them manually fold the papers but its still not finished printing. I helped a collegue for one of the level. Waiting for them to call me to help. Otherwise, I might prefer to hide in the kitchen....
Not that I have anything to cook on hand. Think straight after work, I am going to Cold Storage. I need to get a few items for the new recipe to try, "Creamy and Cold Banana Wafer Pudding" thingy. If I remember the name correctly. So gonna proto-type it tomorrow, aka experiment with it for the first time. Then I cant decide what to do on Friday... Think I should ask to use the acoustic guitar again.... The lax is welcome but sometimes is really too lax that its too un-natural... IF not then its Cheesecake proto-type..
Thinking of heading to gym, I missed on Sun due to heading to Ikea until quite late. Also on Mon, my assignment changed day, so missed, plus knee cap still painful. Think even if I head to gym, would skip the legs exercise until knees are better. Just stomach and arms. Think an hour will do. Maybe I should do it tomorrow straight after work, then can still head out... Head where and do what is another thing though. No worries for that. If not, head home and finally practice guitar.
I wish the stock market would make up its mind to either go up and keep going or drop and keep dropping. Its already Oct, and I've only hit the $10k target... Where's my next target of $15k??? I want to look forward to getting $1k.... Hmm... This non-moving or slight fluctuating market is really irritating at times. Hope to get more 'gains' this month and up til the end of the year.
And for the whole day, I have nothing to do.
Yes. Nothing.
I have to go for work as normal and end as normal. Without a thing to do...
Though at times I am glad for the lax. Am I getting too lax?
Like now, I have just almost killed an hour surfing stuff online and watching a few youtube videos. To be fair, I had a long day today, with 3 lessons taught by me solo in a row. Then have cleaning supervision and followed by another Eng class where I go in to assist. I want to help out with the exam by helping them manually fold the papers but its still not finished printing. I helped a collegue for one of the level. Waiting for them to call me to help. Otherwise, I might prefer to hide in the kitchen....
Not that I have anything to cook on hand. Think straight after work, I am going to Cold Storage. I need to get a few items for the new recipe to try, "Creamy and Cold Banana Wafer Pudding" thingy. If I remember the name correctly. So gonna proto-type it tomorrow, aka experiment with it for the first time. Then I cant decide what to do on Friday... Think I should ask to use the acoustic guitar again.... The lax is welcome but sometimes is really too lax that its too un-natural... IF not then its Cheesecake proto-type..
Thinking of heading to gym, I missed on Sun due to heading to Ikea until quite late. Also on Mon, my assignment changed day, so missed, plus knee cap still painful. Think even if I head to gym, would skip the legs exercise until knees are better. Just stomach and arms. Think an hour will do. Maybe I should do it tomorrow straight after work, then can still head out... Head where and do what is another thing though. No worries for that. If not, head home and finally practice guitar.
I wish the stock market would make up its mind to either go up and keep going or drop and keep dropping. Its already Oct, and I've only hit the $10k target... Where's my next target of $15k??? I want to look forward to getting $1k.... Hmm... This non-moving or slight fluctuating market is really irritating at times. Hope to get more 'gains' this month and up til the end of the year.
Tuesday, October 05, 2010
Negativism and the act of complaining
The question is WHEN is negativism and the act of complaining too much. This post comes after another collegue told me how she felt my counterpart is too complain-y. It's a long story. But to sum it up, the truth is that collegue is REALLY negative and complain-y about stuff. But think the other just concluded that after half year plus personal interactions. Seriously IF I had thought I was negative and complain-y during my time as an educator under bond, she takes the cake.
I am careful NOT to let the negativism get to me by choosing just to let stuff go one ear in and out the other ear. I remind myself to be appreciative of my job with the pretty decent pay and working hours plus the perk of having free time to do stuff like monitoring stocks, though I can't trade, do other stuff plus little or no admin work nor OT nor have to bring work home nor is anything at the back of my head once I walk out of the workplace. I only turn on the work-mode once I open the laptop at work. Also music calms the savage or bored beast.
I have learnt in the period of time that I was unemployed, to be grateful for small things, to be contented with some things and Not just compare everything and expect everything to live up to one's expectations. Of course these all didn't come to me in a flash, I had to really dig at my psyche to extract issues that really bothers me, the things that Really makes me happier, the things that I Now have and should be grateful for, and also what sort of achievements I wanted to work on; not according to other's measure of success, BUT according to my own sense of what is success for me realistically and also how I might work towards the greats, even though I am starting realistically. For me, when there is nothing more to look forward in Life, it really makes life dull, boring and a dread. What many fail to realize is that nobody but yourself can define what are the things one should look forward to, dream about.
Don't try too hard to live up to other people's nor society's expectations. You are no longer in school. Already graduated and earning own pay. The need to live up to "parental" expectations is there to guide in the earlier years but once earning own pay, we should move out of this "what-others-think-matters" so much more than what we think. As pong as I am not doing anything illegal, there's nothing wrong to value own health more, value own free time after work, pursuing a passion pushed aside in favor of realistic work, to start and develop new hobbies and passion, to remake one's perspective and parts of the personality for the better. To rely more on oneself to define who you are, be comfortable with that.
To be able to look back at decisions and say "Yup, I wouldn't have done it any other way."
But these comes from taking ownership of one's life. Recognize that there are limitations everywhere even yourself, yet there are aspects one can control and work on. There are things that no matter how much u try, it can't nor be easily changed eg work systems but there arethings in your control; how am I going to approach the situation, the thoughts and attitude I would adopt. Think that is important. If finally, things still can't be changed, either u reject and leave or learn to live with it with certain compromises.
That's the way I deal with many things now. I find I am not stressed about much things. Take it a day at a time, don't let things get to me easily, continue to work on areas and goals that I deem important (irregardless of other's opinion), and continue to 'enjoy' and 'find joys' in each day that comes. Even if not new 'adventures' come, so long as I find it 'fruitful', 'accomplished' even at tiny, non-existent thing like, I finished my work, I came home earlier, managed to help out, all means something to me. THAT makes me happy, feeling happy. Small things like these defines happiness according to what you value.
Even when feeling down, there's exercise, family and friends, tonnes of stuff to work off the negativism. Don't end up complaining just for the sake of complaining, that's the bad habit I think that collegue has. Don't let negativity creep up and sap the energy at work or outside work. Recognize if you are the one being negative to a situation or is the situation Really so negative? Many a times, it's we who react negatively to a neutral/positive situation. Recognizing this can help one adjust the attitude away from being negative.
Needless to say, there's already too much negativity in our lives, since young through the education system where ouristakes are highlighted but not the good parts. We hardly praise ourselves, we try to earn praises from others. We try to live up to high expectations which seems to be built mainly on other's high expectations and fail at times. Nobody celebrates the mistakes, no one praise you for standing up after a fall. The real thing is people don't get praised for alot of things, we can live with it and learn to be alright with some self-praise and less of such 'hard-to-get' praises.
No worries for me. I am still more positive person despite having to hear all the trival complaints about almost everything under the sun, from food disliked to dislike of certain way of doing things, to sleepiness and more. So long as I recognize my own feelings and thoughts, such won't affect me much, would forget after listening type. Though I would like to listen to positive things after too much of it and that's where music saves me.
I think everyone has their own grouses, and we do at times air our complaints to get support, advise, comments from others. BUT when it's all purely about grousing, and leaving the issues untouched, repeating same grouse over and over and over again, one better be careful not to irk those who have to put up with it and be wary of falling into this 'cycle' of negativism that breeds even more negativism.
I am careful NOT to let the negativism get to me by choosing just to let stuff go one ear in and out the other ear. I remind myself to be appreciative of my job with the pretty decent pay and working hours plus the perk of having free time to do stuff like monitoring stocks, though I can't trade, do other stuff plus little or no admin work nor OT nor have to bring work home nor is anything at the back of my head once I walk out of the workplace. I only turn on the work-mode once I open the laptop at work. Also music calms the savage or bored beast.
I have learnt in the period of time that I was unemployed, to be grateful for small things, to be contented with some things and Not just compare everything and expect everything to live up to one's expectations. Of course these all didn't come to me in a flash, I had to really dig at my psyche to extract issues that really bothers me, the things that Really makes me happier, the things that I Now have and should be grateful for, and also what sort of achievements I wanted to work on; not according to other's measure of success, BUT according to my own sense of what is success for me realistically and also how I might work towards the greats, even though I am starting realistically. For me, when there is nothing more to look forward in Life, it really makes life dull, boring and a dread. What many fail to realize is that nobody but yourself can define what are the things one should look forward to, dream about.
Don't try too hard to live up to other people's nor society's expectations. You are no longer in school. Already graduated and earning own pay. The need to live up to "parental" expectations is there to guide in the earlier years but once earning own pay, we should move out of this "what-others-think-matters" so much more than what we think. As pong as I am not doing anything illegal, there's nothing wrong to value own health more, value own free time after work, pursuing a passion pushed aside in favor of realistic work, to start and develop new hobbies and passion, to remake one's perspective and parts of the personality for the better. To rely more on oneself to define who you are, be comfortable with that.
To be able to look back at decisions and say "Yup, I wouldn't have done it any other way."
But these comes from taking ownership of one's life. Recognize that there are limitations everywhere even yourself, yet there are aspects one can control and work on. There are things that no matter how much u try, it can't nor be easily changed eg work systems but there arethings in your control; how am I going to approach the situation, the thoughts and attitude I would adopt. Think that is important. If finally, things still can't be changed, either u reject and leave or learn to live with it with certain compromises.
That's the way I deal with many things now. I find I am not stressed about much things. Take it a day at a time, don't let things get to me easily, continue to work on areas and goals that I deem important (irregardless of other's opinion), and continue to 'enjoy' and 'find joys' in each day that comes. Even if not new 'adventures' come, so long as I find it 'fruitful', 'accomplished' even at tiny, non-existent thing like, I finished my work, I came home earlier, managed to help out, all means something to me. THAT makes me happy, feeling happy. Small things like these defines happiness according to what you value.
Even when feeling down, there's exercise, family and friends, tonnes of stuff to work off the negativism. Don't end up complaining just for the sake of complaining, that's the bad habit I think that collegue has. Don't let negativity creep up and sap the energy at work or outside work. Recognize if you are the one being negative to a situation or is the situation Really so negative? Many a times, it's we who react negatively to a neutral/positive situation. Recognizing this can help one adjust the attitude away from being negative.
Needless to say, there's already too much negativity in our lives, since young through the education system where ouristakes are highlighted but not the good parts. We hardly praise ourselves, we try to earn praises from others. We try to live up to high expectations which seems to be built mainly on other's high expectations and fail at times. Nobody celebrates the mistakes, no one praise you for standing up after a fall. The real thing is people don't get praised for alot of things, we can live with it and learn to be alright with some self-praise and less of such 'hard-to-get' praises.
No worries for me. I am still more positive person despite having to hear all the trival complaints about almost everything under the sun, from food disliked to dislike of certain way of doing things, to sleepiness and more. So long as I recognize my own feelings and thoughts, such won't affect me much, would forget after listening type. Though I would like to listen to positive things after too much of it and that's where music saves me.
I think everyone has their own grouses, and we do at times air our complaints to get support, advise, comments from others. BUT when it's all purely about grousing, and leaving the issues untouched, repeating same grouse over and over and over again, one better be careful not to irk those who have to put up with it and be wary of falling into this 'cycle' of negativism that breeds even more negativism.
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